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AIBU?

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Original poster

Driving without licence - WWYD

321 replies

Washingyourcurtains · 28/09/2019 20:32

I've recently found out my father in law has never had a driving licence. He's in his 60s and has owned and driven cars all his adult life, just never took his test. I'm shocked about this so would be interested to know what others think and if this is more widespread. Obviously it's a big secret so I can't discuss it with people in real life.

He drives my 2 young children around, sometimes long distances and on motorways as we live the other end of the country and sometimes meet half way to hand over the children and they go to theirs by themselves (which in itself is great for all of us). But I feel really uncomfortable about them being in his car now as he doesn't have insurance (presumably). It will cause a massive issue with my partner if I stop them from being driven by him as he will think I'm overreacting. But what if he has an accident and they are seriously injured and there is no insurance? Should I just overlook it? What would you do.

OP posts:
Lifecraft · 30/09/2019 12:56

Driving without a Licence will invalidate any insurance you may think you have.

Right, let's nail this nonsense once and for all. Anyone reading this, go and look at your insurance certificate. Under the section marked
persons who can drive or people entitled to drive or whatever.

I guarantee it'll say something like the names of those who are covered to drive, plus it'll also say something like "providing they have a licence to drive or have held a licence and are not disqualified from holding one

So if you held a licence years ago, maybe just a provisional, but for whatever reason no longer have one, you are still covered if your aren't disqualified from getting another. So this blanket statement of Driving without a Licence will invalidate any insurance you may think you have. is clearly not true, as shown by your certificate.

andyoldlabour · 30/09/2019 12:59

"I think this is much more widespread than we realise"

You are right familycourtq, this article suggests 1 in 40 drivers are unlicenced.

www.nopenaltypoints.co.uk/penalties-driving-without-full-licence.html

Provincialbelle · 30/09/2019 13:36

I would do what my desperately missed late DF taught me. No compromise with road safety or anything to do with cars, ever. I had that drummed into me from day one. Never go in a car without seatbelts, never with a drunk driver, never with a reckless driver, never in a car with no MOT, always maintain your cars properly and always drive appropriate to the conditions. He had 60 years of safe motoring and we have carried on with the same principles, always.

The key thing he taught me is this: there is no discussion for road safety. So he would immediately bar the children from travelling with an unlicensed driver and wouldn’t have the slightest hesitation in saying why - directly to the bloke’s face. Anyone who complained would be shut down instantly and he would not give a flying monkeys what anyone thought, said or did.

feelinghelplesstoday · 30/09/2019 17:30

My ExH was same. I only discovered when we were stopped by police on way home from hospital with our new baby! Yep that was a shock. Arsehole that he was.
Personally I'd report him x

Luluinkent · 30/09/2019 17:38

I don't understand how he has got insurance as you need a driving licence to get it...so does this mean he is nothing driving without a licence but also uninsured? Either way, id be having a quiet word in his ear, and if he doesn't apply to sit for his license then I'd be shopping him to the police.

exaltedwombat · 30/09/2019 18:21

How did you 'find out'? I smell a distinct possibility of someone having added 2 and 2 and getting 5.

I think the insurers require you to 'hold a licence or be entitled to hold one'. A loophole for people who have merely forgotton to renew.

Anyway, the next thing you do is speak to HIM about it. If you inhabit a generally law-abiding section of society I suspect there's an explanation.

ForalltheSaints · 30/09/2019 18:31

Never get in a car with him, never have any other family member or your children do so either.

The only question is whether were he to agree never to drive again, whether you would not report him to the police.

ton181 · 30/09/2019 18:36

Enter his vehicle registration here, ownvehicle.askmid.com/

Consider reporting him anonymously?

Whycantibeapuppy · 30/09/2019 18:46

Report him. I can’t abide drivers with no insurance and no licence. A friend of mine when I was younger was hit by one and has been in a wheelchair since paralysed from the neck down. Makes me so angry. He could kill someone

CountryGirl1234 · 30/09/2019 18:49

Run a check on it you can type in AA CAR REG SEARCH and type in the reg number you may have to pay for more details there is a free site but I can’t find it.
I would sit down and have a word with him. Hubby obv knows but say you don’t care it’s making you feel uncomfortable knowing they’re not insured and to just ask him to take his test.

Aridane · 30/09/2019 18:51

So many misconceptions about insurance

  1. yes - your insurers do check you have a licence, where they do not require you to provide evidence yourself (Irish style!), they check online

  2. uninsured drivers are not uninsured as regards 3rd parties since the Motor Insurers Bureau provides compensation for victims of uninsured (or untraced) drivers

By the way, does anyone recall what happened to the poster on another thread who shopped her 15 year old son to the police for driving under age and without a licence or insurance in order to get the delinquent father into trouble?

EllenMP · 30/09/2019 19:14

It will be hard, but I think you have to have a conversation with him and ask him to either get a license or not drive your kids. If he was in an accident and it was discovered that he was driving illegally he could be jailed. I would not want responsibility for him running that risk because he was ferrying my kids. The evidence suggests he is a very good driver - he hasn't been caught in 40 odd years, so he must have avoided accidents very effectively. But I don't think you can tacitly condone it.

manicmij · 30/09/2019 19:18

When applying for insurance you are usually asked about convictions eg speeding, drink driving. He obviously is declaring he has none as he hasn't incurred the wrath of the law. He has though lead the insurance company to believe he does have a license. Not only will he have no insurance he is committing fraud. Wonder if he is prone to deception in other matters in life. Your DH and family need to wake up as to the seriousness of the situation. Stop allowing him to transport children, you know about it therefore you are part and parcel to the offence.

Ated · 30/09/2019 19:20

If he has an accident then the fine would be enormous and if someone was hurt then that is everything that he owns gone as well, including car, house, bank account, furniture and his life.

Loveyou3000 · 30/09/2019 19:32

@exaltedwombat OP has said he got caught speeding and told them he didn't have a licence, that's how they found out

DanceItOut · 30/09/2019 19:35

Nope sorry, my kids would not be going in a car with him again if I were you. Drama or overreaction or not. It's the law. It's the example being set etc. My foot would be down on this one and it would be non negotiable.

gill1960 · 30/09/2019 19:37

Stop him driving straight away

If he refuses to stop then tell the police

He will be charged immediately with driving crimes

Its simpler for him to take a driving test immediiately than end up with a criminal record which will stop him driving legally

I can't believe that your partner lied about this crime

B9ddy · 30/09/2019 19:39

are you seriously asking peoples opinion as to whether you should let your children in a car with an uninsured driver
good grief

nuxe1984 · 30/09/2019 19:39

Report him anonymously.

And don't let your children get into his car.

Why risk their lives for the sake of a family fallout?

Ferretyone · 30/09/2019 19:42

@Borderterrierpuppy

It's not quite as bleak as you paint! In the UK if you are injured by a non-insured driver [as possibly here] then the Motor Insurance Bureau steps in

Ferretyone · 30/09/2019 19:46

@Washingyourcurtains

From this instant please do not allow your DCs and any one else that you care for or have cares for to get into this man's car. Although I question "how" you can possibly know that he has not and never has had a licence until he can prove that he has you must not.

Do please go to the police if you have really good evidence of what you saying for all the wider society.

exaltedwombat · 30/09/2019 19:46

If he "got caught speeding and told them he didn't have a licence" his
comeuppance will already be in progress.

Lifecraft · 30/09/2019 19:50

Stop him driving straight away. If he refuses to stop then tell the police.
He will be charged immediately with driving crimes

Your confidence in the police to spring into action in the way you describe is so naïve, it's rather charming. If my experience is anything to go by, they will shrug their shoulders and say "nuffink we can do darlin' unless we catch him in the act."

FelicisNox · 30/09/2019 19:50

Dear me... I thought I'd see it all on MN tonight.

  1. your husband needs a smack upside the head.

  2. so do you for going along with this and putting your kids at risk.

  3. report him anonymously.

That is all.

(I'm not inciting violence, my post is tongue in cheek).

NearlyGranny · 30/09/2019 19:54

I've read the whole thread and there's only one way this makes sense. MiL has a driving licence, the car is in her name, likewise insurance, she lets him drive unlicensed and uninsured and when he triggered the speed camera, she took the points or paid the fine or went to the sessions.

If he is ever involved in a collision or pulled over for a faulty light or breaking the speed limit, it will all come crashing in.

I agree you cannot trust him to drive your precious children and this is a moment to put your foot down, regardless of what label your DH might use to minimise it. It's clear this kind of carry on is normalised in his family but I'd encourage you to see it stops right here!

Of course FiL can put this right easily by taking his test. If he's such a great, knowledgeable, safe and experienced driver, where's the problem?

Just tell him and DH that DC's DGF can drive the children again as soon as he shows you his DL. Meantime, it might mean he sees less of them. Sad but unavoidable and not OP's fault.