AIBU to ask for the slatterns of MN to come forward?

[MarianaMoatedGrange]

Inspired by another thread. I am a self confessed slattern. Would rather read a book or browse MN than clean to a rota. I wash dishes, do laundry and am clean in person, but happily coexist with cobwebs until they get quite bad (adds to the Victorian Gothic of my home is my reasoning).

I will have a cleaning frenzy every couple of weeks or so then subside back into lassitude, draped becomingly on my sofa with a book or phone (aka slobbing out in leisure wear or PJs with chocolate to hand).

DC grown into adulthood with various views on cleaning. Oh, I lived briefly with one man when young, then never again so it was and is entirely up to me how I lived. DC taught how to clean/tidy/cook, which they did age appropriately. One enjoys cleaning.

Levels of squalor never enough to incite interest from authorities - just vaguely smug looks from my cleaner, tidier friends

So, any more of you rota free, as-and-when sisters out there?

I stuff things in drawers, don't iron things unless they absolutely need to be ironed, I don't clean windows (because when I try I always leave a smeary mess that's worse than before) and don't always clean up spills on the worktop

MrsLeclerc I remember those huge random piles of stuff when the DC were living at home. I too found things I'd forgotten I'd bought when I eventually tackled them, along with 'missing' things that I'd rebought. I had 5 books of stamps once as they kept getting lost in the piles.

Re: 'missing out on life' - I'm sure there are lots of people who manage to keep much cleaner/tidier houses than I do and still make time for lots of other exciting stuff but...

...I always think about a lovely mate of mine who never, ever accepts daytime invites on a Saturday (eg, coffee, lunch, shopping, generalised mooching) because she is cleaning. Her house is lovely but surely not as lovely as brunch?

Sorry, too many 'lovely's in that post...

Ah, my people!!

I think my approach comes from being brought up by a parent who would let it get pretty bad, then blitz, then let it go, then blitz etc. We never really were asked/told to do anything and thought it was all totally normal.

My DH was brought up in a very clean and tidy house and did daily chores from a young age. He is still very house proud.

So our house is very in between. I’m on maternity leave and do bare minimum all week, he has a go at the bigger jobs at the weekend. The house is never immaculate!

Hello fellow slatterns. I actually posted a few days ago about not doing housework. With DC at nursery and a very part time job, there's no excuse. Don't get me wrong I keep kitchen surfaces, loo and bathroom sink clean and makr sure rubbish and recycling go out but that's it. I too would rather do anything than housework but the mess stresses me out at the same time. I'm the worst I've ever been and in the past have kept a very vaccumed and tidy home. I rarely dust and have a clean laundry mountain. The vacuum comes out when it looks terrible.

It's my weekend cleaning, haven't kept up with it and now have the whole house to do.
I don't clean to a rota and prefer working on my hobby and writing my book.
I do cook most of the time as dh is usually working during this time and we'd never eat if I had to wait for him to do it. He does do more than his share round the house though and cooks when he can.
There's more to life than living in a clean house, I love my spiders and cobwebs, but dh hoovers them away, and takes spiders outside.

I hate cleaning so much. It is so soul destroying.

We have a lovely cleaner who comes every week. She makes the house sparkle so in between times I just have to wipe the kitchen surfaces.

Before we had her I would avoid it until it got so bad I couldn't really bear it any longer. Because she's doing all the big stuff I can easily manage the daily laundry, dishwasher stuff.

Ahhhh, my people 🧘‍♀️

MaudBaileysGreenTurban Yes! I will never forget an ex colleague turning down a girly pub brunch on a lovely sunny day because she had an ironing pile to tackle

Is it wrong to just paint over tea stains on a wall because I cannot be arsed trying to clean them?

I clean when everything starts to feel a bit less fresh and maybe a bit grimy. So one half arsed proper clean about once every 12 days, one big one that takes about a day every two months (couch covers get washed, throw blankets get washed, pillow cases, deep hoover). Inbetween I tidy up and do laundry and brush crumbs, wipe the dirty cooker top and sticky counters down etc but that's it. Though I have to admit I've not done more than swept the kitchen floor in 4 months until the other day when I scrubbed it. I wipe up big spills obviously but mopping the kitchen floor every day or aeek? Nah. Fuck that.

Celebelly no it not wrong. It is sensible

I never think I'm full slattern, until i go to people who have these very empty pale grey homes that seem so spotless. I go home and do a load of cleaning/tidying in a frenzy.

Then the toddler destroys it and the cat leave a fluff everywhere and I actually cook in my kitchen, regularly, that makes some mess

Oddly, it's messier with me on mat leave, because the toddler and I are at home to make a mess!

I'm really good at mental housework! I make lists in my head of all that needs to be done, then I do exactly what I'm doing now- drink tea and MN on the sofa looking at the cobwebs! grin

This is me! I’ve found my twin!!!! 🙏🙏

I did take a cobweb down today, it’s been there 2 months and I’ve been watching Mr Spider make it bigger every day. But I haven’t seen him for 2 weeks, so I think he may have moved home. He was a good housemate. Clean, tidy, quiet, kept himself to himself. I will miss him.

Thanks @TwattingDog! I’ll look into that.

I wonder how many people would actually think our houses are disgusting though. Sometimes I honestly think people exaggerate how much time they spend doing their precious cleaning and how much time the rest of us are way too hard on ourselves and think it’s never enough. Besides my MIL (who is relentless in looking for faults in me and pointing them out) and my DH (who listened to her) no one has ever said my place isn’t clean. And I’ve pressed brutally honest people. It’s never going to be spotless. Not that sort of house. But I’m not a hoarder and there’s no faeces on the floor so...

Crazy to miss out on anything to do cleaning!
Despite sporadic efforts on my part, our house always looks a state... It's comfortable and lived-in, but also kind of sticky looking
I have two messy DC, a husband who cooks, washes up and takes out bins, but does little else, and a thieving cat who nicks clothes from the clean laundry pile heap and flings them around the house.
I do the bare minimum: toilets, laundry, food shop, wipe surfaces... The rest is for when guests are invited round!
I did try 'everyone tidy for 10 minutes a day' with a timer to ensure we didn't do too much, but even that only lasted 2 days

My people!!

I wash up and wipe kitchen surfaces daily, I change the bed and clean bathroom weekly, and I keep on top of the laundry mountain, but other than that, nah. I grew up with a housework obsessed mother; it was not fun and I just think there is more to life.
I work full time, pets, teens, and I’m trying to have a life. I don’t want it to include a duster or a hoover permanently attached to my body. I will admit that I do piss myself off about my lack of ability at folding up and putting away laundry after it’s dried. Always struggled with that.

Its the posters who co.plain on mumsnet about how stressful their lives are and list what they do evert day thst leave me agog

The idea here is that DH (who is carer for MiL who shares the house) has full responsibility for all household duties - laundry, cleaning, shopping, cooking - for all 3 of us plus our lovely old puss. Reality is that he doesn't see the piles of washing, dust bats hanging in every corner of every room and doesn't note when we've run out of milk, butter or, worst of all, cat food.

I could nag but instead I merely step in occasionally when I am out of knickers or don't want puss scratching me to death at 5 am wanting her breakfast. I did cave and sweep the kitchen floor when I started tripping over debris but more out of self defence (recent knee replacement) than out of a lack of scruffy slatternliness.

It's a big change from living at home with an OCD mom who insisted on a spotless house when I was growing up with my flock of brothers.

We generally have 3 days a week when our house looks good starting from when our cleaner comes. Then I have a 4 day run where my 3 year old isn’t at nursery and the house looks like a bomb site before I run around trying to tidy for the cleaner.

Also would like to say that I think DCat is letting the side down, she is meant to be keeping the spiders and cobwebs out, and instead she just leaves masses of fur everywhere.

I also have a Eufy robo-vac, I paid £170 a few weeks ago so worth keeping an eye on. It is brilliant. DS named it Jeff. Both kids love it, it's oddly easy to anthropomorphise.

Life is too bloody short to adhere to a rota to clean your house. My house is clean, but it is quite untidy at times ( piles of clean laundry that I haven't yet put away, toys and colouring bits and bobs from my dd, and general stuff that accumulates). I don't want to live in a show home. I do like things clean, but cant be arsed to be constantly tidying.

Vulpine Yes I get you. There's really no need to fill every day with busyness. A little Slatterinity never hurt anyone!