How do you and your SO view inheritance/gifts of money/value?

[letsjog]

So it got me thinking with recent threads and how messy it gets.
How do you and your OH view any monetary/high value gifts or inheritance the other gets?

Me and my OH generally have a pretty laid back attitude about it. I wouldn't try to lay claim on anything he is due to inherit and likewise. However I know we will both turn to each other to discuss what the best course of action would be.

Any monetary gifts would probably go towards the credit card and a small sum for a treat if we could afford it. Neither me or OH would go crazy and just buy expensive things for ourselves without consulting each other.
I'm due to be gifted something soon and he said he is happy for me to do as I please with it and it's mine. But I know I will turn to him and ask him to make a decision on it together as I want it to benefit both of us and DCs also.

Any large or small sums of money that might come as a gift from family we would leave to each other but then again I know we would both do something to either benefit the family/pay off something or at least use a bit of it to treat the other person.
Unless the money was gifted for a specific purpose in which case we would use it for that purpose.

I wouldn't dream of dictating to him what to do with inheritance from his side but I also trust and know he would be very sensible with it and do what's best for our family. If he was to blow 10k on his hobby whilst we sit up to our ears in debt then he wouldn't be who I thought he was and likewise.

So I was wondering how does everyone else view inheritance / monetary gifts / property in their relationships?
Is it all 50/50 or not ?

Any money including inheritance etc is pooled but we are married with DC.

Dh got a ppi payout last year and kept it all.
I didn't say anything but made a mental note.
Any tips /work bonus I get I keep now!
We are married with 1 dc and I have other dc. Monies in general aren't shared anyway.

We pool every penny together also married with DC

DH keeps half of his yearly bonus and the other half normally goes towards a family holiday. He is due to get a small inheritance soon... I have earmarked it for a new kitchen despite his protests - he knows we need one and would say if he didn't agree but tends to be quite frivolous with money so I'm putting my foot down haha!

It's all shared, although under our local laws unmarried cohabiting couples have the same financial rights as married ones.

The exception is inheritance which is legally ringfenced only for the inheriting partner. In practice we would share that too, or at least share the decision-making about how to use it.

We pool every penny apart from small personal birthday gifts.

Everything shared here. Over the last few years we have received inheritances worth about £200,000. All went into family pot.

Money is seperate, especially inheritance.

Each can choose to spend how they want, my dp is putting his in as depsoit to next house, and its being protected by a deed of trust.

Married w dc. We were discussing it the other night - inheritance would be pooled just like any other money and we discuss how we spend/save that. Anything like jewelry or personal items would belong to the person inheriting.

We pool everything apart from birthday gifts too. We have both had inheritance and shared it. We are married with two dc.

we’ve basically agreed then any inheritances will be passed through to the dc. Saves us arguing over it- ha ha

My DP lost both his parents within about a year, unexpectedly and he’s only in his early forties - and now has a fairly significant amount of money (not millions or anything, but a lot more than a couple of thousand)

It’s his as far as I’m concerned - we’ve been together 24 years and have children together and the rest of our money is pooled.

If he wasn’t willing to use some of it if we had financial issues or debts I suppose that could cause problems, but we don’t so it’s his.

He does talk to me about possible plans for it because we’re a family, but ultimately it’s his to do what he wants with, it’s not money they purposely set aside for him to inherit... they died and that’s all he has from them now.

Other unexpected money like PPI just went in the general shared money, but I feel this is different.

It’s all shared. Married with DC.

We pool all money. I recently received one and it went into the joint account and he used savings accumulated before we were together for joint things. We got a joint account once we were living together

In my case I grew up in a house where we sometimes went hungry because my dad had already given my mum a paltry amount of housekeeping money for the month. I prefer to pool money, although I didn't in a previous relationship where I was with someone who was financially irresponsible. What other people do is totally their choice though.

House deposit - he was a tiny bit miffed that I used the £3k my parents gave us as part of my side of the contributions.

I pointed out that they had saved that money to provide ME with a home, and that they wouldn't be financing a home for him if he weren't with me. He realised he was being a plonker.

They gave us £10k for our wedding. That was for OUR wedding, so it went in our pot. It was much more than we needed, and we've still got £5k in joint savings as a result.

I've told him what my perspective on inheritance is (I don't think he's thought about it). Depending on the amount, I'd want to make all the major decisions about the money (e.g. we're buying a holiday home, or investing, or spending it on travel). Then we'd make the small decisions together - which holiday home, what investments, where to travel. If it were a smallish amount, say £1k, I'd probably just buy a single one off treat for us both.

Same principles go for lottery wins etc, but if I won a huge amount (£10m+), I'd also want both of us to have a completely independent, secured fund, then go nuts with the rest together.

I bank on nothing, but as it is, I potentially stand to inherit various sized shares of estates that total £2m (a family farm, an unmarried aunt, another aunt, my parents, all with significant assets). I don't like to think on it, but it's foolish to ignore.

Issues like this haven't arisen for us

If I got gifted/inherited/won money I would share it with my partner and if it was alot, my sisters too

If she was gifted/inherited/won money then she'd probably do the same

We dont have really joint finances, no joint bank account but we both contribute to mortgage

We pool money except for birthday gifts.

But if either of us got a large amount, the one who received it would probably take a bit out for a treat for them, before pooling the rest.

All shared, he gets a big bonus each year and it's pooled. Inheritance has been put into the family pot, we share everything and wouldn't think of not but I know that doesn't work for everyone so no judgement.

Married with DC and all money is joint. DW received a significant inheritance few years back. We paid off mortgage, went on holiday and have saved the rest for the DC. DW always treated it as our money and I will do the same if I receive any inheritance (even if we divorced).

We just share anything and everything. Not married but been shacked up for nearly 30 years with 4 kids, so I guess we are pretty committed.

With inheritances and family gifts it's always been left to the person recieving to decide what to do with it. But it's unspoken that the expectation is that it should be for family benefit except for a small treat for the recipient.

It's all joint. DH had received a significant inheritance (6 figures) before we met; that has been sunk into the house which we jointly own. I received a substantial (though not 6 figure!) inheritance recently, and it'll definitely be a joint decision as to what it's spent on.

We're married but with separate bank accounts, bills divided up evenly.

Anytime either of us have gotten a bit of extra cash we talk about what we would both like and what we actually need then make a decision together what to spend it on.

It’s all pooled, but inheritance has to wait until whoever inherited is emotionally ready to make a proper decision. It’ll sit in savings until then.
One small pot of money is currently my magic money set aside for gratuitously frivolous stuff, but that was due to the extraordinarily stressful bureaucratic process I had to go through to obtain it. If it becomes needed for joint expenses, it’ll go into the shared pot.

This is really interesting. DH and I pool our salaries and take small equal allowances of 'fun' money out.

DH is due to receive payment from an inheritance some time fairly soon. He would like to spend some of it on something specific for him, which would be in memory of his relative, and will probably put the rest in our joint fund. I agree with OP that if he spunked it away on frivolities for himself or hoarded it away then he wouldn't be the person I know him to be.

Also, we own our current property jointly despite the fact that it was funded in part from the equity from my flat. I did this deliberately as we were married and committed to each other. So if he were to invest some of the inheritance in paying off our mortgage or buying our next property then this would even things out.