How do you and your SO view inheritance/gifts of money/value?

[letsjog]

So it got me thinking with recent threads and how messy it gets.
How do you and your OH view any monetary/high value gifts or inheritance the other gets?

Me and my OH generally have a pretty laid back attitude about it. I wouldn't try to lay claim on anything he is due to inherit and likewise. However I know we will both turn to each other to discuss what the best course of action would be.

Any monetary gifts would probably go towards the credit card and a small sum for a treat if we could afford it. Neither me or OH would go crazy and just buy expensive things for ourselves without consulting each other.
I'm due to be gifted something soon and he said he is happy for me to do as I please with it and it's mine. But I know I will turn to him and ask him to make a decision on it together as I want it to benefit both of us and DCs also.

Any large or small sums of money that might come as a gift from family we would leave to each other but then again I know we would both do something to either benefit the family/pay off something or at least use a bit of it to treat the other person.
Unless the money was gifted for a specific purpose in which case we would use it for that purpose.

I wouldn't dream of dictating to him what to do with inheritance from his side but I also trust and know he would be very sensible with it and do what's best for our family. If he was to blow 10k on his hobby whilst we sit up to our ears in debt then he wouldn't be who I thought he was and likewise.

So I was wondering how does everyone else view inheritance / monetary gifts / property in their relationships?
Is it all 50/50 or not ?

It would go in the family pot. When I became a SAHM for about 5 years dh set up a standing order that meant the same amount went from his wage to each of our ISA's every month.

He is the higher earner, but our wages go into a joint account and our savings are equal.

I will more than likely inherit more than DH, but either way it would be family money.

We share all money.

My DH and I put everything in as we are married but I guess because we have similar backgrounds and similar potential financial inheritances it’s not something we ever really think twice about.

DH gets a very large bonus each year which goes in the family pot.
Neither of us have inherited but if we did I imagine it would be the same. I can’t imagine keeping it for myself... I don’t know what I would spend it on that wouldn’t feel like me living the high life while he was sat at home! We would obviously discuss how we both felt the money would best be spent. I imagine it would be used for something like paying the mortgage/saving for DC’s education/family holidays.

This hasn't arisen for us as we both come from pretty poor backgrounds but I would imagine we would share. We share everything else so wouldn't think that this would be any different. When we win the euromillions tonight though I will come back and let you know how it goes.

Me and DH have always shared all money except birthday money gifts. Married 40 years and only have a joint account.

DH received an inheritance a couple of years ago of £200,000. We both decided what to do with it. We bought a house and had a nice holiday

Considering I subsidise our family income with money from my trust, I feel under no obligation to put in a "shared pot". Any inheritance will be mine and up to me if I want share it or not.

Any inheritance or money is just our money. If we received something now it would go to debt payments and house repairs.

We have fully joint finances most of the time but when my grandparents died and left me some money I wanted to do something with it to remember them. So a big chunk went on travelling as a family, which both my grandparents loved. The rest went on our house. DH was happy with this and if he wants to do something special with an inheritance in future I would be perfectly happy for him to because I think inherited money can come with emotional ties.

We have been married for years, and I am unlikely to inherit anything because my parents have bugger all. My DH more likely to inherit anything significant and I trust him to use it for the good of the family. I won't be wading in telling him what I want him to use it for, but then I know he will invest it wisely for OUR retirement and spend some on nice holidays for both of us. Ultimately I think it's his decision to make but if he was the type to fritter it on gambling or personal hobbies I might have a different outlook!

In the past he has been gifted chunks of money and it has always gone on family holidays/ helping our dc out/buying things for the house.

1st inheritance (DP family): he spent a small amount on buying us a second hand car (£4k), he kept the rest (£96k).
2nd inheritance (DP family): he bought us a house outright (£200k), he kept the rest (£50k)
3rd inheritance (my family - £18k): as of yet undecided. Will use at least some of it for something for us both, likely on something we wouldn't otherwise do/buy, and will put the remainder in my savings account.

I realise this makes it sound like we're loaded, but our families are actually quite similar with the difference that DP's family are all in the SE, whereas mine live in a cheap part of the country.

We're married, so I guess legally we don't have a his/mine distinction any more. His inheritances were from before we were married, but the house is jointly in our name. We also keep our own bank accounts, but transfer a set amount every month into two joint accounts (one savings and one current account).

We have only joint finances (have done all our married life, including pre children). Some are in separate names for tax reasons (eg we each have ISAs in our sole name) but we regard even those as joint, and we discuss / agree how to invest or spend.

If there was an inheritance, we would probably do the same, although I think that the spouse whose family it came from might get more of a say in the situation. Were I to get an inheritance I would hope to buy a grand piano with part of it and I don't think my husband would object, but I wouldn't dream of suggesting that if it was my husband's inheritance (actually, his parents have just done some tax planning and given us enough to buy a nice one, but I haven't looked upon it as money for "me" so it's not even crossed my mind. It's currently invested in joint names, as we have no immediate spending needs right now).

Married with a child, view inheritance as joint money. He was left some before we got together, we used it to buy our first home, joint mortgage. I am about to inherit almost the same amount and it will be spent clearing debts and a family holiday. We will also have about £1k each for personal spends.

I would assume to make joint decisions on any inheritance he gets and happy with vice versa. We dont totally subscribe to the mn one account for everything, but our finances are pretty entertwined and debt and spends are all family money. (Though we have our own personal accounts as well as the joint one).

Being married it makes sense to do it this way. I would not be happy with him keeping or deciding what to do with an inheritance and vice versa.

dh has had 3 pay-outs, 2 small inheritances of around £15k, a PPI of around £10k and an endowment policy from first mortgage of around £18k. I've had a 24yr redundancy payment of around £45k.

Our finances are joint but each time the person who had the payout has decided what to. It has been mostly a combination of - put a chunk in the mortgage, put a chunk in ds's savings, buy a new (to us) car twice, some kept in rainy day savings (as I am older and no longer have the security of 24 yrs service in my job and redundancy payout if I lost it).

Because they came in drib and drabs over the space of 15 years there was never a significant amount of money to make huge life changing decisions about, but the mortgage is now paid off, we have some savings and are both happy with what we did with them.

I inherited £150k from my parents when I was still married. My mum had asked that I use it for something fun, not boring like a mortgage etc. However by that point we had almost got to the point of declaring bankruptcy as our houses value had fallen dramatically, losing all our equity, so we ended up using it for a mortgage on a new house.

When we divorced I was adamant that the inheritance was to come to me, as XH was still in a high earning job with a pension whereas I’d been a SAHM Earning very little for years, no pension, not even voluntary contributions towards state pension, so I need the money for the future. He’s now off earning mega bucks with no responsibility while I hold the fort with the DCs and am still limited due to lack of experience and qualifications, so I’m very glad to have the inheritance money locked in the house for my future. Had we still been together of course it would still be family money.

All of 'our' money is 'our' money. Even in the early days of our relationship we pooled everything. I've had contributed much more inheritance money but my husband has put in a lot more salary money. We've never squabbled about money ever.

We have given our kids money to buy houses etc and have not put any conditions on the gifts at all, however, I would secretly prefer it if they kept the money for themselves. I like their partners a lot but I'm not interested in giving them money. I wouldn't say that to my kids though. It's up to them. We chose to give the money to them without any conditions.

small amounts we keep ourselves (but in reality it all ends up going on things for the house or children anyway) larger amounts are mostly pooled but if there was something that individually we particularly wanted, we'd get it, but generally it gets used as a family (mainly in boring ways such as paying off bills or the car).

I'm married, no DC.

Everything is 'ours'. There's no mine/his.

Houses are in both our names, joint accounts, joint savings, joint investments.

Of the sum total of our assets, I contributed 10% and DH contributed 90%.

He was happy to share, as we're a team.

Everything is 50:50. Any windfalls would probably go 3 ways (the 3rd into my DS's savings).

Everything is shared.

My DH inherited and it wasn’t even a discussion. He text me to say he’d sent me the remainder owed on my personal loan, paid off the mortgage which is in his name and then got new deeds with my name on them too. Remainder he put into savings but offered me a ‘bonus’ to buy something nice if I wanted. I would’ve done same for him if it was my inheritance.

Luckily it never even came up as I would’ve be upset if he was very ‘my money’ and sat on it while we still paid mortgage, loans etc. We are a team and it was in both our best interest to clear any debt we have and paid interest on. We are now saving each month what we would’ve paid off mortgage.

Happy I have such a wonderful DH 😃

Both dh parents passed away; inheritance discussed his wishes were for it to go towards debt which then allowed us to pay for the children’s uni fees. I asked if a small amount could go towards settling immigration problems I was having and needed legal help to resolve. He had no issues sharing.
I’ve received inheritance from grandparents and used it to upgrade the family car after discussing it.
I’ve received gifts of money 1-5K from my parents and use it primarily for me but still shared to a certain extent (artwork or home upgrades).
However! Neither one of us have serious money problems, generous incomes and tendency to save.
I will at some point inherit from my remaining parent, at this point my wish is to upgrade the home.
Married over 40 yrs everything in joint names. No financial concerns with siblings or children.

We pool everything. I work, DH doesn't. DH inherited 200K, I didn't. It all works out in the wash.....

His if they come to him. 'Ours' if they come to me!

And by 'ours' I mean into a joint account with a verbal agreement that we 'consult' each other on purchases over a nominated amount. That amount never got revised and it got to the point where technically I should have been asking for his approval every time I filled the car up so I could go to work! He still wouldn't revise the agreement. Essentially, I handed him powers of veto. Silly me.

I'm so glad he got his little inheritance first so I got a clear demonstration of what he was really up to. By the time I got a lump sum, I'd got a separate account to put it in.

Don't get me wrong, I've shared lots: holidays, experiences, things for the house, a car etc. But I wasn't going to hand him control of it and have him dictate what I could and couldn't do.