Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To opt for 2 embryos to be put back? (I want twins from IVF)

82 replies

AliceAbsolum · 19/09/2019 20:33

34 years old. Trying for 4 years. 3rd and final cycle.

Dr in Cyprus is keen to put back 2 (if we even get 2) because I have never seen a whiff of a positive test.
I think they want their success rates to stay high (they report by pregnancy not live birth rates).

I've always opted for 1 before. But now I'm mulling it over I'm starting to think maybe it is worth the risks. Miscarriage rates are higher, babies in the NICU, health problems. 2 newborns! The financial and emotional impact... Its really scary. BUT people do it all the time don't they?
The thought of completing our family in one go just sounds amazing.

DH is concerned but happy to go along with what the Dr is saying.

Thoughts?

OP posts:
WarshipWarrior · 19/09/2019 20:34

God I have no idea but I'd get this moved to another board for better advice.

GeorgieTheGorgeousGoat · 19/09/2019 20:35

I would.

Notthetoothfairy · 19/09/2019 20:35

I would say go for it.

Windydaysuponus · 19/09/2019 20:37

When a friend was having Ivf she was told 2 doesn't give you more chances. If 1 fails it could take the other one with it.
Better 1 high grade embryo. Then if that splits you get twins!
Just repeating what she was told.
Not a Dr!

Floralnomad · 19/09/2019 20:37

I would think the only relevant bit was the miscarriage rate and if that is significantly higher then it’s probably not the best option . Best wishes whatever you decide .

Original poster
AliceAbsolum · 19/09/2019 20:37

Nah I love AIBU advice!

What say you vipers?

OP posts:
babbi · 19/09/2019 20:40

I had 2 embryos placed ... one made it to a live birth ... absolute joy of my life ..

Go for it
Good luck x

Gruzinkerbell1 · 19/09/2019 20:40

Go for broke and get two put back. Good luck!

PaulGalico · 19/09/2019 20:40

I thought two embryos was standard practice. I had two put back (result was one baby) but that was 18 years ago so standard advice might be different now. Do you usually have enough good embryos to freeze?

nocoolnamesleft · 19/09/2019 20:41

Personally, in that position, I would want the highest chance of taking home a healthy baby, not the highest chance of getting pregnant. Given how many IVF multiples I've seen born very premmie, I personally would go with 1 embryo. However, we all have a different perspective on balance of risk, and you will need to do what you can best live with.

TheGonnagle · 19/09/2019 20:43

I had two put back. Dd is just dropping off to sleep upstairs.
Good luck x

PrayingandHoping · 19/09/2019 20:44

I had ivf earlier this year and the stats are that 2 embryos back doesn't actually increase the success rate

If you look on the hfea website I'm sure the stats are on there

TwinsetBeck · 19/09/2019 20:44

I had 2 put in and had very healthy twins at 38 weeks. Good weights, no intensive care etc. Talk to your doctor. They should have your well-being as their primary focus.

mypuddin · 19/09/2019 20:44

I'd go 2. Definitely as you've already tried before. We've done ICSI a couple of times. Had 2 put in on second round and only one of them implanted.

Original poster
AliceAbsolum · 19/09/2019 20:46

Premmie babies is a scary prospect.

Yes I think these days most clinics will opt for 1 if you're under 40 (in the UK at least).

It depends on whether they survive the thaw and how much that effects the quality.

OP posts:
Minai · 19/09/2019 20:46

I’d definitely get 2 put in if you are ok with twins.

Adelais · 19/09/2019 20:47

With it being your third cycle I would put two back this time.

Littletabbyocelot · 19/09/2019 20:48

I had two put back as I thought I had very little chance of it working and wanted to maximise my chances. Both took and I now have 5 year old twins. Not going to lie, it's hard - financially, emotionally, physically. Definitely worth it though.

What I wasn't warned about was the risk of quads. Ivf embryos have an above average chance of splitting so the risk of two sets of identical twins is real, if small. I could not cope with higher order multiples so I'm glad I didn't know at the time.

AnchorDownDeepBreath · 19/09/2019 20:49

When a friend was having Ivf she was told 2 doesn't give you more chances. If 1 fails it could take the other one with it.

This is what my friend was told too. I'd ask about stats and see if you can find out if this is more or less likely than getting twins.

rainylake · 19/09/2019 20:49

I have had IVF (successful). I was adamant when I looked into it that I didn't want the risk of twins. Have you read the original report on multiple births in IVF. Google "one child at a time report" and you can get it online. It makes very sobering reading (it made a big impact on best practice at fertility clinics) and was what made me certain I wasn't going to allow 2 embryos back even if the doctors suggested it. So do look into the risks and the statistics before you decide, and think about how you'd cope with that, as well as the lovely fantasy of two happy healthy children. Also bear in mind that there is evidence that a weaker embryo can make the stronger one less likely to take, so your chances of having a successful pregnancy (or two) is overall higher if you put in one embryo at a time. Finally, bear in mind that the chances of an embryo splitting are higher with IVF so if you put back 2 you could end up with 3, which is quite dangerous. I do understand the temptation though.

Mrswalliams1 · 19/09/2019 20:49

I had 2 put back after 9 years of trying and 4th failed attempt. Result was healthy twin girls. Go for it - wishing you the very best of luck

SinkGirl · 19/09/2019 20:52

I have twins (not via IVF, not identical).

We had lots of complications. One twin had IUGR, stopped moving and came close to being a stillbirth. Only five weeks premature but spent two months in nicu with a rare endocrine disorder. Both twins have autism, one has multiple other disabilities.

I know lots of twin parents and the number of complications, issues etc does seem to be higher than amongst us than the singletons I know.

If I were you, I wouldn’t opt for two, but that’s just me.

Original poster
AliceAbsolum · 19/09/2019 20:52

Argh it's so hard to know.

Thank you @rainylake I shall read that report.

OP posts:
NearlyGranny · 19/09/2019 20:53

Two is a great choice! Twins are not massively more risky and it does mean you get extra special care and more scans, etc. Mine were assisted conception buy not IVF. We lost a single IVF pregnancy at 12 weeks after having two embryos replaced. I wouldn't hesitate.

44PumpLane · 19/09/2019 20:57

Chap I worked with, his Mrs had ivf and had 2 put in and ended up with twins.

Chap I met through twin group had ivf and had 1 egg which split, got identical twins.

I have twins (no ivf, just spontaneous) and it's bloody hard. Physically, mentally, financially and emotionally.
I love my twins but honestly, recently we had to separate them for a day and parenting one on one was like the easiest thing I've done in nearly three years!!