Aibu to think this just isn’t right

[Deyes999]

I have lived in my house for ten years. My neighbour has never once opened his windows or curtains in that time. Other neighbours in the street who have lived here for 20 years say he hasn’t opened them since they lived here either. He is a middle aged male lives alone, comes and goes to work each day, says hello if he sees me, not enough to make conversation. He keeps to himself, He rarely has any visitors but when he does he speaks to them outside and never invites anyone in. It’s all very strange and weird, anyone else ever known anyone like this? Would you do anything

@flyingspaghettimonster you ‘hate daylight’? Do you not go outside during the day?

In 15 years i have seen our neighbours open a window about 3 times, they are both smokers, never have washing on the line outside and never mow their back lawn. weird to me especially as they are younger than us by a mile. they pay an older neighbour to mow the front lawn every few months. a couple of years ago they went to the trouble of cutting grass, laying a new path and creating a small enclosed area with a water feature and a fire pit, saw it used once and its now covered in bramble. the grass is now 3 ft high and the water feature cannot be seen. I do wonder why they bought a house with a front and back garden when they have no interest. When they first moved in they built a greenhouse which has now gone and they cut down both the lovely trees in their garden which is such a shame as they never even use the garden.

If you saw the front of my house only, you'd probably think similar things.

My living room curtains are never pulled back - because I have a tropical fishtank in the window which does not like extra light. Due to the layout of the room its the only place this tank fits. Whilst I have a background on the tank, the window gets full sun all day and overheats the tank if the curtain is open.

The curtain in my front bedroom is also drawn, its a junk room, its too full to open the curtains at the minute.

The curtains at the back are open once the full sun is off the back of the house, I sit by them and work by them, in full sun the glare off my monitor is too much, or upstairs its casting a shadow over my drawing board.

I don't invite strangers in often, only those I need to. It requires organisation as I have a dog who would bite visiting strangers (hes easily managed outdoors but in the narrow confines of my terrace, a stranger coming in is a major trigger).

So.. good reasons that don't make me a total weirdo for not always opening all the curtains and not inviting the world and his wife into my home.

You know what though, if I liked the dark and lived like Mr Trebus, it wouldn't be any of your business!

There could be so many reasons that someone doesn't open their front window/ curtains. If you were concerned for him, then fair enough, but if you've seen him and he seems ok, then try not to judge. He might well be an introvert, as someone else has said. If I'm in a particularly introverted mood and have had to engage in conversation with colleagues etc all day, I am so relieved to get home and shut the world out. It's best to be open- minded and understanding about it. Everybody is different. I actually find it hard to engage with neighbours if they come across a bit nosey or pushy. Doesn't mean I am up to anything. Luckily I have unintrusive ones right now. We're all friendly, warm and polite when we see each other, but i couldn't tell you what's growing in their gardens or what time they opened their curtains etc.

Thanks for all of your comments. I am being careful what I put just in case my neighbour happens to be on here. Just to clarify, I can see quite easily (without) being nosey the front and back of my neighbours house because of the way our properties are positioned. Both front and back curtains/windows have never been opened and they are not on the latch (you can see the mould on the glass). The back garden is very overgrown which does affect neighbouring properties. Hence why I happened to have one conversation with another neighbour who informed me that it has been the same for 20 years. I do not go around gossiping about my neighbours it was a one off conversation. I have children and I just find it a bit weird. I am not a horrible judgemental person. I care about my neighbours and would help anyone who needed it. I have just never come across anyone else who doesn't ever open curtains/windows and wanted to hear others thoughts on it. Now I know from the comments on here that it's obviously not that unusual so I shall just forget about it and carry on with my own life.

@deyes999 says: "I have children and I just find it a bit weird. I am not a horrible judgemental person."

You literally contradicted yourself here. You just judged him.

I am not judging him at all, I am just judging the situation as unusual behaviour to me because I have not come across it before.

Only on mumsnet would this be considered normal. I wouldn't like it and think he's hiding something and that his house stinks. I'm the complete opposite and my neighbours probably think wtf am I doing I open the windows as wide as they will go especially in the morning houses need air. My neighbours never open there widows of blinds and I just think there scruffy. Each to their own

I'm amazed how many posters on this thread live that way. I couldn't bear to live without natural light and being able to see the outside world. And I've never seen a house with all the (visible from the street) curtains drawn all the time, yet clearly a decent percentage of MNers responding here seem to have curtains drawn 24/7.

I wouldn't do anything about the neighbour, but like the OP, I'd find it weird. And slightly unnerving.

I thought this was just a man thing 😂, my DH never opens curtains if I'm out or away and there's a man who lives across the street from us, he is the same.

However recently we've had a lady move in who's mid 50s and single. First time I've seen her today and she hasn't opened her curtains in her front or back bedroom since she moved in a month ago and her livingroom curtains are a little open.

Am I going to say anything? No, maybe he can't afford blinds? Maybe he forgets.

You could say the same about me
I have black out blinds in my kitchen however I can see out through them but no one can see in. Same for the windows upstairs that overlook the front of the house . I rarely if ever open the front window which is where my kitchen is situated.
However at the back of my house I have my patio doors open, back kitchen window open and all the bedroom windows open
I just don’t like nosey fuckers looking into my house from outside . I might want to shag my DH or walk around naked but I don’t want nosey cunts looking in my house

People live differently. My next door neighbour hasn't turned their downstairs bathroom light off for the last 4 years.

we moved into a house, and because we were new in the area, we had people pulling up at the drive way staring in at us then driving away, this happened lots, then we were the talk at a local get together at the town hall.... we shut all the curtains on that side of the house, the landlord came over and said she had been told we had our curtains closed all week ( ??????) i said yes because everyone keeps driving along the road and pulling up and staring in at us and its fucken weird... she got us net curtains!!!! maybe he has his curtains open on the back where you cant see in, maybe he hates being on display as much as i did

Our blinds at the front of the house are always closed as the dog is a pain in the arse woofing at anything and everything but we regularly have the windows at the back of the house or back door open and have patio doors so get plenty of light - it’s really not that unusual and really non of your business