How do I lose a stone by Saturday?

[Gracie300]

Meant to diet. Forgot. And I like wine and carbs.

Maybe if I cut a leg off? Just knee to foot?

Egg diet 👍🏼

Go for the limb you'll miss the least

If you've got really long hair you could cut it off?

This Saturday?

That will be tricky.

Military diet? 3 day one.

Military diet!!!

Food poisoning???!

Norovirus?

Spanx!

Stand up really straight and tall and buy spanx?

It doesn't have to be a stone's worth of body fat does it? You could lose a stone's worth of, erm, stones.

You could always try contracting dysentery. It worked well for me, but still took 2 weeks of starvation.

😂 😂 Yep, a limb is the only option. Sorry.

Strict Atkins diet. Lose lots of water fast although you might not have a bowel movement for a while.

When weighing yourself, gently lean on another surface. Job done.

Zip your mouth

What’s happening on Saturday?

Would s distraction work? Big hat or soneygung?

When weighing yourself, gently lean on another surface. Job done.

This is far and away my favourite.

Are you going somewhere with someone else? Could you pad them out somehow so you look smaller in comparison?

When weighing yourself, gently lean on another surface. Job done.

Going by the responses, I'm assuming it's lighthearted so I'll lay off my don't be so fkn ridiculous, you can't immediate response
Live off cabbage water smoothies for three days, get weighed nekkid, cut your hair/nails, do a dump and cross your fingers

I feel like the general consensus is that this cannot be done...

Just feeling a bit fat. Not enough to do anything about it until a days notice, but fat all the same. I’ll just get drunk quickly and forget about it. Thanks all.

Also love that people are giving me actual diets, I’m definitely not gonna look them up and hope for the best just in case they work... Ha

Go on Trip Advisor to look for the worst run down hotel, or go round town looking for restaurants with a food hygiene rating of 1.

Order the mussels, the main with the 3 chilli symbol next to it and the cheese board. Wash it down with a bottle of Sambuca.

If by any chance you are Teresa May, taking your necklace off before weighing yourself might help.

When weighing yourself, gently lean on another surface. Job done

My favourite too. And one I actively practice and always feel so much better. Depending on the lean, I have been as light as 6 stone. That was brief fun. My clothes don't play ball though. Spoilsports.

I once lost a stone in one day... any chance you are 9 months pregnant? Having a baby will shift a stone easily.