to say that the term "date night" gives me the rage?

[DelphicOracle]

Just that really...... why is it that weve adopted this term in the last 5 years. I know its irrational - but it just grates on me. What happened to "going out", "catching up over a drink", "spending the evening together", "going out for a meal".... aarrghh.

It makes it worse the longer someone has been together..... you cant "date" your husband, youve already married him! I would suggest that if youve been with someone for more than 6 months its not really a date.

Arent dates meant to be something you do whilst not being a relationship or with someone you dont really know, but have been out with once or twice before?

Maybe Im grumpy, maybe Im old, but Im not sure when I was in my twenties (2.5 decades ago) anyone "dated". Men or Women just asked someone if they fancied a drink... or you all went out with work or a group of mates, and went home with someone you had your eye on, at the end of the night?

AIBU to say its twee, and makes me feel a bit cross .... Dont even get me started on parents taking their kids on "date nights" - not envy

We are pregnant is so much worse we are pregnant makes me want to poke somebody in the eye!

We’re pregnant is worse yep

IME and IMO the more people give this kind of terminology to stuff in their relationship the more problems they’re having in said relationship.

Up there with people checking into places with “the love of my life,” and declaring their forever love on social media and the like.

For me the term date night says “we’re going out alone to see if this relationship can be saved.”

I don’t care for “play date”. Sounds as if you are imposing adult expressions on little children. Much prefer “having a friend come around” for tea, watch tv pay in the garden etc. As for date night. Sounds really odd. Let’s have a nice night in and a take away etc sounds more loving and comfortable. But then folks I am old.

'Courting', 2.5 decades ago? (Forget who said it.)

Courting was what my granny did, and she was born around 1890!

Though she did once tell me about giving one of her courting fellows short shrift, because, '...he tried to get his hand down my placket fastener!' 😄

People have odd ideas of history. Our parents all fought in the war etc

A bit like renewing wedding vows equals one of them has been having an affair

I am confused Stealth what you on about ?

Sorry just the though that 25 years ago, way back in history everyone talked about 'courting'. 25 years ago was the late 90s :) you see it in posts about the older generation, how they made sacrifices during 'the war' - assuming they mean WW2, my almost 90 year old grandad was a child during the war!

Im loving how people seem to infer that because I dont like labelling an activity with a slight trite phrase, that must mean I have either:
Problems in my relationship
Dont like dressing up
Am lucky becuase I have nothing else to moan about
Should get a life becuase there are bigger problems in this world
Have endless childcare

Please...... its meant to be lighthearted! Ive gone through years of paying £1.5k per month in childcare so I could keep working at our fledgeling business. Ive been so skint I couldnt buy new clothes (not even tights or kickers) for a year.
Ive thought my relationship has suffered through the early years of having babies. I missed going out and having fun with friends and my DH because we were too skint. and I was too ashamed of how fat Id got, and couldnt fit into anything remotely nice......

But not once, through good times and bad, have I ever felt the need to label time out / at home with my DH as fucking Date Night. Again for those who cant grasp it - Its the PHRASEOLOGY that is ridiculous, and the sentiment behind it. Its not cringey to go out for a beer with your husband... just the action of feeling the need to label it

Ah yes I get you now i did see a thread about carseats in the 90s they were going pn about climbing about the car i had 90s babies and we had carseats

Dh used it recently when dc were staying with my parents for a few days and I decided we'd take a trip to ikea after work and spent two hours looking at stuff before buying lots and trying to cram it in the car. Dh commented "this 'date night' sucks!" can't imagine ever using it without it being jokingly.

No one should be have a date with their own dc though, that's weird!

Why the sneering at people who might want to make an effort during a difficult patch? E.g.

It sounds like the couple are trying to reinject romance into their relationship when things have gone a bit stale or wrong

For me the term date night says “we’re going out alone to see if this relationship can be saved.”

The assumption seems to be that this is embarrassing. I don't think it is. DH and I have a laugh doing all sorts, but I don't look down on people who want to dress up and make an occasion of going out sometimes, as if they're 'trying too hard' by not wanting to stay in and play scrabble every night.

I hate it too. Another silly American phrase we don’t need, like play date.

No doubt people on ‘date nights’ post it to instagram with a ‘living my best life’ hashtag. 🤮

Why the sneering at people who might want to make an effort during a difficult patch?

There’s no sneering at people making an effort. It’s the vomit-inducingly twee phrase that’s being ridiculed. And the fact that it only became a recognised phrase because people feel the need to proclaim their ‘date night’ to the world and his dog.

Go out with your spouse. Have a great time, or even a mediocre time. Make the effort to shore-up your relationship if it needs it. Nothing wrong with any of that. But there’s need to announce your ‘date night’ all over the shop. It sounds rather desperate.

colourlessgreenidea - exactly - its the phrase rather than the action. I was rather hoping that 6 pages in, people who have rtft would have worked that out

agree, dont like it, or playdate
out for a meal, is not datenight.

Lol @ "Lover's Night" 🤣🤣🤣

I suppose I used it think going out for was just going was something you did for a purpose

Cinema - see a film
Restaurant- experience different food / no cooking / Mark an occasion
Pub - escape 4 walls / drink alcohol.

But 'date' night was different.
It was a time for just the 2 of you do something away from the usual hum drum stuff.
And benefitted your marriage.

Week in week out family responsibilities and TV can ware a bit thin ......

Don't know what else you'd call it.

To be honest.... just reading the comments here... the people who don't like the term "date night" just don't sound like very nice people.

You don't date your husband but you can be on a date with them. It's just a romance-based time together. Date night is far fewer words than your many examples which are all long and specific.

I listened to some of Zoe Ball’s utterly mindless Radio 2 breakfast show the other morning.

It’s aimed at people who want to do Date Nights with hubbie after the Little Man came along.

The whole thing makes my teeth itch. Even the way she speaks. It’s like an ikkle pink cup cake.

I thing I belong in a different land to be honest

I hate it as well. It's very American and completely pointless. I prefer 'having a night out'. I agree that it's usually used by people who call their husbands 'hubby'.

It's very American

Why exactly is this a negative thing?

I can't stand it either. Grown adults who have been married for years? Yuk. It's all of a piece with the infantilised language from American that is dumbing down everything.