To think that it is up to me what I do when my child in swimming lesson.

[swimmingmum6]

My children have swimming lessons at a lovely local swim school. The groups are small. Teacher is with 3-4 children in pool, parents poolside but not involved in lesson. I enjoy watching but also chatting to the other parents and answering the odd email so that I don't have to do it when my children are in bed, or when I'm properly with them.

Just had this posted on Facebook page. AIBU to dislike the tone? I'm not glued to my phone, look up and encourage frequently but I am also a working mum who gets little space in the daytime and reserve the right to catch up with a couple of emails while my child is in the pool supervised and learning.

The post reads:
Recently I have noticed a sharp increase in the use of mobile phones and tablets on poolside during our lessons.

Understanding how busy our lives are parents can be, I would like to trial our poolsides as ‘Digital free’ zones.

I would like to give you all permission to step out of your hectic day whilst your child is swimming with us by turning your phone off or onto silent.

It is wonderful to see a child encouraged and supported by their parent/Carer poolside when they have achieved something new or master a skill they have been working on. These shared experiences will create memories of their precious early years.

I am hoping by giving you permission to delay writing that email or text will enable you to relax, focus on quality time with your child and create a closer ** (name of swimschool) Community!

If you have a sibling waiting for their lesson or their brother/sister why not encourage them to watch, pick up additional teaching points or bring a book or homework to do.

Should you have a pressing matter to attend to or need to make an urgent call, please may I ask you to step out of the pool to do this when swimming with us.

I would appreciate your thoughts on this idea, so please do respond to this post with a 👍🏼 or ❤️ or comment below.

With much love and many thanks,
(Name of swimschool teacher)

What do you think?

Watching a swimming lesson is as boring as hell! In addition, your child doesn't need you to encourage them as they should have their he'd in the water or be listen to the instructor and not be distracted by parents waving and gesturing from the side. Watch if you wish, but it shouldn't be compulsory! As for safeguarding, what a load of tosh!

I'm not sure I'd agree with 'patronising'. Perhaps just trying to word it as nicely as possible so that people don't take offense and kick off. I think it's a great idea, we spend waaaay too much time on our phones.

The tone of the email is patronising but I agree with the sentiment.

I remember when DD was learning to swim in a small local pool the viewing area was fairly small and always quite crowded. There were only a few seats near the window and if you had to have one of the seats further back the view of the pool was restricted. It always frustrated me that the same two mums would do their damnedest to bag one of the best seats near the window - but having got them they just sat and nattered to each other the whole time, paying no attention to what was going on in the pool. I would think "WTF do you have to get those seats if you are not bothered about watching the lesson?" I guess it would have felt the same if they had pushed their way in to those seats and then spent all the time on their phones.

I studied for a masters while my 3 were at lessons. All on phone. Doing research. Taking notes. They'd have loved me patronising message imo. No probs with no phones poolside re safeguarding but that's not what they said

I think it's a great idea, we spend waaaay too much time on our phones.

doesn't stop you from being on MN right now!

What's the difference between doing homework or answering work emails? You aren't actually watching either way. I'd respond with a similar tone to your op, that catching up on work emails during swimming allows more "quality time" with your children.

Is it the fact it's a phone that's the issue or would she be annoyed at you reading a book or something too?

Stuff that. I sit at the back and read in my tablet. I save quality time with my child for when I’m actually, you know, with my child.

because my DH or their grand parents are interested in seeing their progress, and it hurts no one if I record my own kids

Aah, so you're one of those very important people to whom the rules for the rest of us don't apply, how ridiculous.

I enjoyed a short time each week to read a book in peace when my DC had swimming lessons, are books banned too?

I'd respond with a similar tone to your op, that catching up on work emails during swimming allows more "quality time" with your children.

I think this is a very fitting response.

My only thought as I read that was “Ah, fuck off”.

What an awful email. It would have pissed me right off. Who are they to police parent behaviour? Surely if they are properly focussed on their pupils they shouldn't even be aware of what the parents are doing.

At my sons swimming lessons parents aren't allowed in. I sit in the changing cubicle and either read my book, read emails, sort banking stuff or just generally arse around on fb. There is one evening in the block that parents are invited poolsodr to watch their child and recieve feedback on how they are doing

I would be fuming if I read that. You are paying them to teach your child to swim, not to try and teach you how to parent!

Yes it's a lovely gesture to want to spend 30 minutes watching your child swim however let's be perfectly honesty 1. It'll get boring after the first 10 minutes and 2. You will end up distracting your child if you're constantly waving or making eye contact.

I would reply stating the potential issues raised on this thread.

I’m just surprised they don’t have a blanket ban on photography at the poolside. Most places do, it’s not optional.

No mobile phones allowed on poolside at all where my daughter swims for Safeguarding reasons.

Condescending! I would probably just sit in the car and leave her to do what she's paid to do.
If she's got the ratio of adults for children, what you do whilst s/he teaches is your choice.

Parents aren’t allowed poolside anymore at our local swim school. They cited too much chatter from parents and it distracts the instructors.

The whole area is tech free as well, so no phones poolside or anywhere else. I’m amazed you are allowed a phone poolside. I’d have thought it’s a safeguarding issue.

I think it's a great idea, we spend waaaay too much time on our phones

The 30 mins or so I spend on my phone when my DD was in a class meant that I could spend quality time with her afterwards. I don’t class watching a swimming lesson with other kids in the pool as quality time.

WOuldn't kill you to do without texting for half an hour.

I'm on the teacher's side.

would be concerned if a teacher wrote to or emailed me and ended "Much Love"!! What an unprofessional thing to put.

quality time

Ranks with "making memories" in my dictionary of bollox.

WOuldn't kill you to do without texting for half an hour

Well I’d have to do the posts and emails that I did then when I was actually “in the moment” with my daughter then. Rather than doing them when she doesn’t need my input.

Our pool has a non photo policy,but I think its unreasonable to expect parents to be watching avidly for 30 mins.If you have younger children to entertain then it wouldnt be possible anyway!

If I was the OP “we need to ban phones for safeguarding” wouldn’t be the slightest issue.

It’s the patronising crap that the teacher spouted.

How involved can you get in a swimming lesson without being in the pool? Surely she should be encouraging the kids to pay attention to her instead of trying to talk to/wave at their parents?