Was I BU to tell her she was nasty?

[itseasybeingcheesy]

So I apologise for the MIL in law thread but I'm seething with anger and I know I'm not rational. Am I out of order? Do I need to make an apology to my MIL?

We're at the park with my DS, and 2 DDs. DS is a newborn. My DH is running around the pavilion with my two DDs being great.

MIL says to me "I've been meaning to ask him when his baby is due".

I look at her shocked and say "that's so nasty". She says it isn't nasty and what is wrong with it? And I tell her she shouldn't say things like that because she is calling her own son fat and she would be devastated if someone said that to her. She again said she didn't know what was wrong with saying it and I told her she had to stop being so nasty and she should never say things like that in front of my children because they will copy her nastiness.

We haven't spoken since. DH did not over hear.
So as not to drip feed - we don't have a great relationship with MIL as she is very negative and has form for saying completely unacceptable things in front of the children. She's quite emotionally manipulative and will often cry if I call her out on being horrible.

Nevertheless I may have overreacted, would you have put up with it? Do I need to apologise?

Shocked the majority is saying it's funny. If that was a mum saying it about her daughter, everyone would be up in arms.

Unkind and unnecessary, IMO.

YANBU at all!! Cannot believe the double standards of people on here. A man's mum should take the piss out of his weight but if it was a woman's mum everyone would be saying go no contact/toxic relationship etc. You had your husband's back as we all should if we expect them to do the same for us.

I'd say if it's boy he will call him Fred, Freda if a girl, but if it's just a dart or a good shite he will call it after you. But I'm bad.

Good on you OP, it is nasty, and if weight is an issue, truly unhelpful! your approach on the other hand, offering to make time for him to go for a bike ride without mentioning his weight, that is helpful and comes from a place of caring, you sound lovely

seriously, do people really think overweight people don't know that they are? what do they think is going to happen? nasty comment from mum, and he'll go "oh dear, yes, there is indeed a belly on me, I had not noticed, off to the gym with me!"

It is nasty. It's not especially funny, and it's not constructive, and possibly counter-productive.

From what you've said it sounds as though your reaction is to your overall relationship/ a pattern of behaviour rather than that comment alone.

What would you have to apologise for?