AIBU to wash and dry my hair?

[Hornet7067]

I generally wash and blow dry my hair every other day and even though I try and time it so it doesn’t affect DH, it not always possible and he always moans because of the time it takes, it probably adds half hour on to my normal getting ready time.

Since I’ve gone back to work after we had a child I’ve given up getting lash extensions done every two weeks because DH kept moaning about the time. My eyebrows were due to be done 4 weeks ago and I haven’t gone to get them done because again DH moans about the time. (I’m very blonde so having my brows tinted actually makes me feel so much better about myself). But blow drying my hair is something I’m not willing to give up, does this make me unreasonable?

When men take less time to get ready for a day out, they should sort out the children.
For some reason, like in the OP, they think the children and the women come as a package and expect all of them to be as quick as them alone.

What the OP needs is to tell him to sort out his own children.

I think priorities change when you have children.

I suppose I see looking after oneself as being about looking after health and fitness - eating well, having time for exercise and not being so ground down that you neglect basic hygiene. So bathing, hair washing, an assortment of clean clothes that look good.

But I suppose I seen an elaborate self-care routine - which to me would include blow-drying hair, tinting lashes etc - as a bit like an elaborate housecleaning routine. Some people are only happy if everything is 'just so' whether that is eyelashes or worktops. I do see having children as offering the chance to reprioritise. That might include a rather simpler routine in terms of appearance in order to prioritise spending time - which is often quite scarce - doing things with other people.

Yes 'me time' is important - but I guess for me that might be about other stuff. A long bath. Time catching up with a friend. Reading a book.

I'd love op to say how much genuine free time each of them gets. I'm willing to bet he gets a damn sight more than she does! Despite her working part time because time taken for childcare and household chores is NOT free time.

I'm appalled at the attitude from posters who are supposedly also women who think op is unreasonable!

Internalised Fucking misogyny much?

I’m with the ask your dh why your dd isn’t ready for when you’re out the shower. My dh used to do this then had no answers when I finally snapped and acted like I wasn’t going to tolerate that shit anymore.
And the bit about you palming your dd off into others so that you can get your treatments done?! Is that not allowed then. Who is he to say how you care for your dc in your own time. Absolutely wally he is and that’s putting it nicely OP.

@ThisIsNotMyRealName1 I've used revitalash and rapidlash both work well, rapidlash is a bit cheaper but was excellent after my last bodged set of lash extensions that left me with broken stumpy lashes. I put it on before bed every night, only takes a second, I took before and after pictures and there is a noticeable difference.

@ThisIsNotMyRealName1
Massive thread hijack but the first is before, then four weeks later and then four weeks later with tint

I'd love to see the responses for a bloke who took an hour and a half by himself to get ready every day including for a casual family trip to the beach, and got an expensive pampering treatment every second week on his day off work, leaving the kids with his mum. Most of us get annoyed enough when our DHs want to take a 20 minute leisure poo...

I think that op is reasonable to want some time, but this is excessive.

Oh wow, thanks @WhyBirdStop (sorry for thread hijack Hornet7067 to make up - I'm behind you all the way on this too btw!) I've been using fLash, results have been nothing like yours. I've just found NZ distributor and my DH is in their city next week so he's going to call in to their factory shop.

I think you might be married to my husband 😩

He moans my legs are hairy but I don't have time to get them waxed, my hair is a mess, my nails are a mess and I'm lucky if I get a shower every 2 days

I'm sick of feeling shit about the way I look but not getting any time to myself while he takes daily 45 minute baths and 20 minute shits

I'm truly surprised by the number of people saying this is excessive. (I have long thick curly hair; I know how much time it takes and recently did an exercise to work out how much it actually costs me in $$ terms - don't go there!) I see it as OP's husband trying to exert muscle/control.

Has he just started to query this? If do why?
You need a cool calm chat. He is being totally unreasonable. Does he not want you look nice?
You could get him to help you with your hair, who knows what might happen .
He is way out to complain about such