To hate life with misophonia

[Harmony83]

For those who don't know, misophonia is a condition that literally means "hatred of sound"
It's not a made up condition, it's becoming more recognised and researched. However, there is no cure and little is known about the cause. For the record I'm not a snowflake, this is a condition that has plagued me since childhood and I have only recently discovered it has a name and I'm not the only one suffering!
To me, trigger sounds are
Slurping hot drinks
Flicking newspapers
Chewing noises
Clicking pens
And many more, I seem to develop a new trigger every couple of months. My immediate reaction is sheer rage, it makes me want to punch a wall and scream and cry ( for the record I'm only an angry person when triggered, usually I'm a happy funny girl! ) it can take hours to come down from being triggered and life can only be described as a living hell some days. It really is unbearable. Sometimes my only solution is to sit alone with ear plugs and my fingers shoved in my ears and my eyes shut until I calm down. Not ideal for a young mother with a professional job!
I'm becoming desperate as my relationship is suffering due to my ever increasing irritability with DH eating noises. I understand I must be a nightmare to live with.
My reason for posting is to see if any other sufferers have any tried and tested methods for easing the reactions? Please no abuse. I really just want help to overcome this and stop my kids from picking up on it.
I get abuse regularly from friends/family that don't understand and people that think it's funny to trigger me just to get a reaction.
Apparently Philip Schofield also suffers with this!

What does your GP say?

There are a couple of things which do it for me, teeth clacking when eating is one, gives me the complete rage and I need to leave the room. That's the only way I've found to deal with it I'm afraid so will follow with interest!

Decent noise cancelling headphones. Dd swears by hers.

Would hypnotherapy work?

Always music on during meals
Headphones for train journeys
Timing loo trips or breaks when others eating noisily at desks
Being open and honest with others eg ice crunchers to ask them not to be offended or I walk away

If I walk away not or

Ask for an audiology referral. I have hyperacusis and my specialist also supports patients with misophonia.

It sounds counterintuitive but I find ASMR videos help to take the edge off it. Look up WhispersRed on YouTube.

I suffer too. It's awful.

I find all repetitive noises a trigger. The dog licking drives me insane. I do a lot of shouting.

I'm not sure what to suggest to help. I often have to remove myself or I will go crazy. Punching a wall feeling sounds v familiar!

Sympathy.

I haven't actually been to the GP as it's not a recognised condition. I don't want to be prescribed anti anxiety meds as a solution.
I have had therapy numerous times for other reasons but always mention misophonia to see if anyone can help but as it's not understood most therapists suggest exposure therapy! Which is the worst thing in my opinion. I would try hypnotherapy but have had it before for something else and I didn't feel I was able to let myself go enough to be hypnotised. I would need a recommendation for a hypnotherapist that is familiar with the condition.
I too find I have to leave the room/building most of the time if triggered. It's a very embarrassing & lonely existence!
I will get noise cancelling headphones, I just don't want my kids to pick up on this and think mummy is nuts. I don't want them to think sitting at Sunday lunch in the pub with headphones on is the norm!
Thanks for the responses

I recently discovered I have the same reactions when DH started watching ASMR videos on YouTube. I could hear the noises from the other room and started shouting, “Oh my god, what is that? GET IT OFF NOW!”

I have always hated these sounds but DH was shocked by my visceral reaction to these “relaxing” videos, so we googled and I fit all the criteria for misophonia. I usually just remove myself from the situation or do some calming breaths until it’s over. Exams were particularly difficult due to this and I believe sufferers should be allowed to sit in separate rooms.

I find it helps if I do some form of meditation when there's a noise I can't tolerate. I think in simple terms it means find a happy place and go there, if you can. I know it's not that simple, but it helps.

Ear plugs might be less obvious than headphones, if you wanted to blend in.

YANBU - you genuinely suffer and it isn't your fault. Give the noise cancelling head phones a go.

I don't have misophonia (or at least I assume I don't) but I must admit some noises really do give me the rage!

DH some times absent mindedly drums his fingers on his leg - drives me absolutely mad!

Noisy eating is another.

Anything scraping/scratching.

The worst was when I was pregnant and we were looking at a new car for me. Off we went to a garage and found one I liked. I very nearly didn't buy it - simply because the salesman's breathing was so noisy and it was seriously giving me the rage I honestly couldn't stand to be in the same room!

Thankfully, DH sorted the paperwork while I waited outside and just went in to pay

It is a recognised condition, and it is referenced on the NHS website. Not all GPs will be aware of it as they are not specialists, that's why, if sufficiently serious, you should get an audiology referral.

My DM has this, she used to go crazy if we ate an apple near her. To the point that she made me throw my apple out the window when I was eating one in the car. We are all very tolerant because we know how much the noises (eating) bother her. I wonder CBT could help?

Yes it's horrific.

Mine are chewing and slurping.
Swallowing loudly.
The muffled noise of a TV from another room/music from headphones.

Literally makes me get so angry and then want to cry. When I've been in public (especially on transport) I've actually drawn blood by digging my nails in my hand.

I brought it up with GP years ago, but I think it's still something that people don't really "get". No-one LIKES those sounds...but it feels like more than that to me x

Yep I have this and it's fucking awful I feel so bad for everyone around me it must be hard on them, I literally can't sit in a room with anyone eating it makes me see red. I also have to sleep playing music and spend most of the day with headphones in. It's miserable. I'm seeing a physiatrist for this and other MH issues so hope something comes of it,
Good luck to you too x

Definitely music on when eating

I think I have it too. I get so angry listening to people swallowing drinks. I used to scream at my brother anytime I heard him drinking!!

The dog drinking his water drives me insane and also when he's grooming his paws.

Slurping is another one. I don't ever make soup because I can't stand to listen to my husband inhale it off the spoon.

I have suffered since I became a teenager. So 25 years.

Biting nails, whistling, food chewing, heavy breathing though the nose, snoring, anything repetitive. I feel like ripping my ears off.

I have learned to cope by eating at exactly the same time as others, watching different programmes than my husband and after sex, separate beds.

He is extremely You need to work out ways to work around it in your daily life.

God I so empathise with you OP!

It's hellish - I had to stop car sharing with a colleague as she had sinus trouble and literally sniffed every few seconds - I used to fantasise about smacking her one!!

My son has a clicky jaw so when he eats (thankfully a quiet eater otherwise) every chew produces a click!! I have to seriously bite my tongue or walk off, it's not his fault bless.

Other triggers are heavy breathers, people who 'clack' when eating, slurpers of tea, the list is endless!

Sounds miserable, but it isn't lol. Just coping mechanisms.

I went to the GP with the exact same thing....shock horror they didn’t care

So I sought out therapy. I went to a CBT person who did something called tapping with me. Now I’m a real skeptic of anything a bit out there but this really helped me. It was almost like having a normal therapy session where we talked through things and certain situations which triggered me and gradually the rage subsides and I learnt coping mechanisms for every day life

I went every 2 weeks for about 6 months and by the end it’s helped. It’s not completely gone but it’s at a manageable annoyance level rather than pure rage

I’ve found I’m less tolerance when I’m tired, not sure if this is the same as you? It can be awful I hate any kind of noise at all! I’ll move train carriages if someone is chewing gum.

Tell me about it. Horrendous!! Dh said to me in the car as he was tugging on his vape stick (😡) that he wasn’t allowed to do anything apart from drive as I refuse to listen to booming music and asked if I enjoyed being controlling.... I suggested radio 2.

I have chronic fatigue and these noises sap a lot of my energy so naturally I want to not have to listen to them. He’s always watching fucking football. The ads and music are 10 times as loud and always booming and he never turns it down.

He’s just gone out with the dog and the shit has just started booming. We are open plan and he wonders why I want to move. [boils head]

Should have added. Yes, I also have a lot of the triggers listed. ^^