To hate life with misophonia

[Harmony83]

For those who don't know, misophonia is a condition that literally means "hatred of sound"
It's not a made up condition, it's becoming more recognised and researched. However, there is no cure and little is known about the cause. For the record I'm not a snowflake, this is a condition that has plagued me since childhood and I have only recently discovered it has a name and I'm not the only one suffering!
To me, trigger sounds are
Slurping hot drinks
Flicking newspapers
Chewing noises
Clicking pens
And many more, I seem to develop a new trigger every couple of months. My immediate reaction is sheer rage, it makes me want to punch a wall and scream and cry ( for the record I'm only an angry person when triggered, usually I'm a happy funny girl! ) it can take hours to come down from being triggered and life can only be described as a living hell some days. It really is unbearable. Sometimes my only solution is to sit alone with ear plugs and my fingers shoved in my ears and my eyes shut until I calm down. Not ideal for a young mother with a professional job!
I'm becoming desperate as my relationship is suffering due to my ever increasing irritability with DH eating noises. I understand I must be a nightmare to live with.
My reason for posting is to see if any other sufferers have any tried and tested methods for easing the reactions? Please no abuse. I really just want help to overcome this and stop my kids from picking up on it.
I get abuse regularly from friends/family that don't understand and people that think it's funny to trigger me just to get a reaction.
Apparently Philip Schofield also suffers with this!

My DS suffers with this. He can't eat with us. Started in his early teens. Watching thread with interest.

Interesting thread, for as long as I remember I have been bothered by other people’s noise, for me it’s passing traffic and muffled TV or other people’s music.

I don’t get as much angry as a panicky uncomfortable feeling of wanting to get away. How ever this only seems to happen if the noises are in my home or garden or in “my space” although being near someone listening to music via headphones does give me the rage.
The same sounds in another location are barely noticeable to me and I am not at all bothered by eating or slurping type noises.
So I am not sure if I do have Misophonia or something else.....does this sound familiar to anyone?
I have recently joined a fb group to look into it further.

Life long sufferer. I am a professional woman - medical . Everything resonates on this thread.
Repetitive sounds and movements. Muffled TV and music in adjacent rooms. Like the previous poster, these noises only bother me in my home environment. Music and TV when out an about , I don't notice. Sniffing, eating , chewing nare all unbearable im all settings.
Bose headphones are my friend.
About to make my first CBT appointment as avoidance is my friend and I need to do something about it .
Good luck to all you fellow suffers.

Noise in the supermarket does my head in, I can't go to the cafe for a coffee after shopping because the cafe is next to the checkouts & the constant beeping of the tills drives me mad. I have to sleep in ear plugs because unless there is complete silence, I cant sleep. I must have supersonic hearing because I swear I can hear electricity in walls, even the sound of my own heart beating when I am trying to get to sleep does my head in.

The fact that most people say they suffer the same thing suggests it’s kind of normal? Most people hate certain sounds or sensations (for me it’s anything high pitched and feeling wise would explode having my nails filed). The medical definition if there is one must mean when this feeling of uncomfortableness becomes extreme. I’ve got no idea but am always sceptical of labels.

Once you throw everything into the mix and dietary requirements in there too you’re getting above 50% and being ‘normal’ is a minority so not even normal.

I have sympathy but you’ve self diagnosed yourself after saying you haven’t spoke to your doctor about it. Google has a lot to answer for many ailments.

I totally feel ur pain-i struggled for years wondering why my ears picked up the slightest sound&people joked i had'dog-hearing'😯 wearing my noise cancellers by day&soft silicone earplugs at night=gamechanger..only started doing this about12months ago-i spend a lot of time travelling/driving through work&frequently in new towns&cities-it started to really get on top of me until i read an article that resonated hence the noise blockers..noise used to irritate&exhaust me-now i flick the switch on headphones and a low static sound(white noise)almost instantly relaxes me..give it a go.

By the way I don’t doubt that you hate certain noises. It seems there’s a lot of people here who hate them too. I’m just saying it’s actually not strange unless it becomes extremely debilitating but doesn’t yet seem a recognised medical condition

Can so relate to this. I once made the mistake of taking a bus for a 9hr trip to visit a friend.

Who knew that it is apparently MANDATORY for every single passenger to consume copious amounts of individually wrapped lollies along with endless bags of potato chips? I flew home.

My children used to get the death stare if they came anywhere near me with a foil bag of chips, which would remind them to back pedal & tip them into a bowl. Slurping, clanking of cutlery, anything repetitive does my head in.

One glimmer of hope for you all, It crossed my mind a few weeks ago that as I get older (49) my sensitivity & internal reaction to these things seems to be lessening. No idea why, but am grateful.

Although my DP has taken to doing the leg jiggle thing lately while watching Tele & ithat still annoys the crap out of me 😳

It sucks. I even have to listen to music or watch tv to distract from my own chewing sounds of wuietly eating with my mouth closed, because it makes me so furious and stabby... I've left.meals unfinished at times because I can't face hearing more.

Caucho the point is for the majority of posters this is debilitating and it is a recognised condition with a neurological origin . It goes way beyond just being irritated . I dearly wish I didn't have it but on the other hand I am lucky enough not to suffer from and mental health problems so I am grateful for that .

Most GPs don't have a clue about this condition . That has been my experience

I take music everywhere with me - we have music every meal time at home and I take speakers for public places. I can't use headphones as one of my triggers is the sound of me eating.

I also let my partner know if I'm feeling particularly rage-y and we will eat alone in seperate rooms.

We don't eat our anywhere quiet (Indian restaurants tend to be the worst).

Also interestingly my 17 month old doesn't trigger me, even though she is the noisiest eater ever!

I have meniere’s and along with the hearing loss on one side I also have hyperacusis, which means I experience some normal sounds as being unbearably loud. It’s got to the stage that I can’t sit at the table with dh when he’s eating as the sound is so loud it’s as if it’s inside my head (dh is a perfectly normal, civilised eater btw). It’s not so bad when everyone’s at the table (three teenagers/students) as the resulting noise helps to mask the sounds. My audiologist says although the temptation is to use earplugs, that can actually make it worse in the long run - it’s better to use other noise to dampen it down/mask it. At least it’s not constant, unlike the sodding tinnitus which is screaming at me ALL THE TIME...

I wonder if my DM has this. She's always been noise sensitive, and she'd fly off the handle with rage at the noise of crisp packets being opened.

I have always thought I have very sensitive hearing and hate noise but only to the level of being very irritated rather than rage I feel for you all. I’m quite relieved to read this thread as I have just always thought I’m very intolerant and fussy rather than thinking as anything else.
The one sound that sometimes produces rage is my neighbours chairs scraping across the kitchen floor it goes through my entire house and I’m not even attached to them. I have considered asking them if they can get rubber tips for,them or something but felt it was too barmy.

An alternative to headphones might be wearable sound generators. They look like hearing aids, but they produce white noise. You can certainly buy them privately and I think they are available on the NHS from tinnitus clinics.

I live with tinnitus, hypercusis and misophonia. I manage these my focussing on managing the panic/rage reaction they trigger. It is the reaction that is debilitating. Meditation techniques work for me because they have a cumulative effect, cost nothing, can be done anywhere and you’re doing it anyway, ie, breathing.

What bothers me most is the rage it triggers i am very empathic, kind, peaceful but the sound of people eating makes me weep with frustration as you cant punch them. It sounds laughable if you dont suffer from it but it's not. I have a member who helps out at one of my groups, he arrives early 'to help' but the sound of him chewing gum has given me sleepless nights as i try to plan how to cope with it during my otherwise lovely silent half hour prep period. I've tried asking nicely I've trued explaining i suffer from misophonia now i am locking the door pretending not to be there just to avoid the mouth slapping chewing and so I am arranging all the furniture /stock /setup alone just to avoid punching the poor man who is standing outside totally bewildered

I haven't sat down and eaten a meal with my DP and children for years. I have to eat alone in the next room. I don't want them to be the target of the anger I feel as it's not "me" They all understand and would never sit next to me on the sofa eating a biscuit or crisps. My dog is also a major trigger for me. If he starts to lick himself I only have to shout his name and he'll take himself out of the room to continue.
It is a horrible condition to feel so much anger towards those you love more than anything. I feel less rage towards strangers making the same noises.

@Caucho I feel you're being a bit dismissive by saying that we all 'hate' some noises. Hate would be a luxury for me. What the posters here are describing is a strong abnormal response to noises such as anger, anxiety, etc. It becomes a condition/disorder when it is extreme enough to affect your quality of life.

The fact that most people say they suffer the same thing suggests it’s kind of normal? There's nothing normal about it.

I read an article by Nicholas Lezard in the Guardian a couple of years ago and was gobsmacked as I'd thought I was the only one with it. Caucho, it's not a dislike of sounds but that hearing the sounds causes rage entirely out of proportion to what is being heard and who is making the sound. The rage dissipates immediately the sound stops.

I don't want to mention what triggers me the most as it's unusual, but it's something I deal with every day at work. I've asked friends and family to avoid doing this and have explained why but they still seem skeptical.

The response to the triggering sounds is massive and tiresome - it's as if the fight response in fight or flight was turned up far past 11 in the blink of an eye.

Music helps, not only as a distractor but because it's soothing.

It's a relief to read all these posts. I am a fellow sufferer and relate to the feelings of rage and despair. I also worry that I am very unreasonable, but I can't help it. The worst things for me are chewing, sniffing and tapping, and my poor husband snoring, even lightly. There is a woman at work who wears a bracelet with a little bell on it, and the constant jingling is intolerable. I can't understand how it doesn't aggravate anyone else! I use earplugs at night but also just go and sleep in the other room. I'm going to investigate earphones I can sleep in, which play white noise. I do find that producing my own noise (might be playing something through earphones or even scratching my fingernails on the sofa or something) can help, as does deep breathing. Following this thread with great interest and hope of useful tips.

Mine came on suddenly during pregnancy and it's not gone away. For me it's breathing. Train rides and meetings are the worst.

It is medically recognised, but it's difficult to find a route for help. We started with audiology tests to rule out any underlying problem. We now have a referral to ENT linked to a tinnitus clinic. There are audio psychiatrists/psychologists (not sure which) in some hospitals who understand. The Tinnitus Society have some helpful information. Our GP has suggested that in extreme cases you can actually get reverse hearing aids to use instead of noise cancelling headphones.