To think labour can’t be THAT bad?

[Bumpingbumping]

Potentially being extremely naive, and of course this is excluding exceptional circumstances/emergency situations.

But aibu to think labour can’t be as horrific as people make out? I’ll be giving birth in 10 days time following an induction and everybody keeps asking me if I’m terrified and telling me how awful it will be.

Surely if it was THAT bad people just wouldn’t do it? Or would opt for a c section?

Again, feel free to hit me with the facts because I’m possibly being naive. But does anyone have any nice birth stories? Particularly following an induction?

Oh god @thesunwillout you poor thing I'm so sorry you had to go through that

It hurts a lot but the hormones help to forget a bit of the pain!

Every labour is different. I hope yours goes well.

Personally, mine was horrific. I never forgot the pain or thought it was 'worth it'. I love my son immensely but he is an only child.

Vaginal delivery recovery is far easier than recovery from the major debilitating surgery that is a section.

Everyone says this, like all vaginal births are uncomplicated.

I had a third degree tear with my first and an elective section with my second. Recovery, in terms of pain and ability to walk was about the same, except I got much better/more attentive care postnatally after the section than after the tear. And I much prefer having a surgical wound in my abdomen compared with the perineum

I was induced with an IV drip, didn’t have epidural. What method of induction did you have ?

Initially it was painful but I could bare it. But the length and consistency of the pain was very very draining mentally and physically.

When you reach the last 2 hours or so after being completely drained out of your will power, the pain becomes absolutely horrific. They call it the transition stage. And you struggle to stay relaxed and positive because you are mentally drained, sleepy and tired.

But once baby comes it’s so sooooo worth it. You get an overwhelming feeling of joy and euphoria. However the exhaustion eats you up while you still have to be alert to your babies needs when you are about to pass out.

So all I can say is, if you expect it to be very hard, and take necessary measures to manage the pain, and to stay mentally positive and strong... then it’s manageable.

You are not mentally equipprd to deal with magnification of labour. You will need to take active steps to help yourself... induced labour is more intense than the body is designed for.

So take it as a challenge... one of those challenges where you get a huge reward in the end.

I promised myself a chocolate bar after... pretty expensive one. But that didn’t entice me I still almost passed out in the last hour..

The only thing that really helped me was reminding myself of the things that keep me mentally strong. Which I had read and prepared before.

If you are going to have natural contractions or an epidural your story might be better. But if not, just prepare yourself to stay focused and motivated while contracting.

Everyone has more kids because they’re now reaping the benefits with the baby and overcame the actual feeling of pain. Something amazing happens after birth... the baby comes...

How could u stay focused on the pain of climbing Everest when you are too busy being cheered for reaching the peak?? Feeling like a star??

I have a high pain threshold and I got induced, and those contractions made me act in a way I never thought I would.

I imagined myself as a proper earth mamma in labour. Ha ha ha.

But as soon as the epidural was in, it was a fantastic experience! The pushing didn't hurt it just was EXHAUSTING. it's like being constipated lol.

Just enjoy every bit of it, because I can't have any more children due to something I went through this year but I would do labour over and over again if I could! (But you never forget the pain, those contractions give me nightmares lol)

Good luck! It be worth it x

You'll be giving birth in anything between 10-17 days time OP. Inductions don't always work and the certainly tend not to be fast for first time mums. My induction with DC3 was 22 hours of niggles and less than an hour if active labour.

As I'm sure has been said numerous times, our bodies produce chemicals and hormonal reactions to ensure most women feel a certain way after birth (hence whilst people have subsequent children) but let's face it, it's rarely an easy, relaxing experience is it?

I felt incredibly empowered to deliver my first child after an epic 51 hours labour (including 14 hours at the hospital despite arriving at 6cm and 2 hours pushing.... everyone was on stand by to intevene...). I had a very text book labour with DC2 and I feel proud that I was able to have a calm, uneventful labour. Just me, DP and MW in a birthing suite, low lighting, relatively quiet etc.... it still wasn't a pleasant experience.

And then DC3 was a planned induction and an (unplanned) rush to neonatal before she was diagnosed with a rare genetic condition. I barely had time to process my labour as I was then watching my baby in an incubator, hooked up to all sorts and being given a brain scan!!

I actually recovered from labour 3 really quickly, as I had to. Life with a baby in Neonatal isn't conductive to rest and recovery.

Thankyou SirJames xx

Argh, posted too soon!
...to massive contractions every 5 mins and it felt as though my body had had no chance to warm up and get used to them, and I had no time for recovery in between.
I also ended up having ventouse delivery as they were worried about DS's heartrate. As horrible as the pain is, it's nothing to the terror you feel when you hear "we're worried about the baby..."

OP, please do some research about inductions and what may happen so that you are fully prepared and able to make decisions about your care if you need to.
All the best with the birth and the baby!
You never forget the pain but it's just totally worth it. My baby is nearly 12 now and those 12 hours of pain have long since been eclipsed by the joy of being his mum.

Some people do have horrendous births, but for me it was actually fine, both times. Intense, yes, unlike anything else I'd experienced yes, painful... not particularly to be honest (comparatively, I mean. Getting my wisdom teeth out was worse! Acupuncture also worse. Actually the back pain I'm experiencing now at 37 weeks is worse!)

I think people who have good labours tend to keep quiet about them for fear of being labelled smug (I'm not at all, I'm aware I'm very lucky!)

Good luck with your birth

Induced labour is without doubt, the most horrendous pain I have ever felt. I was hooked up to the hormone drip with DC1, and remember telling DH that something has to wrong because no one can possibly be in this much pain and survive it It was just like one enormous, hideous contraction with no break between “surges” that honestly felt like it was ripping my entire body apart. There’s a very good reason why I will never again consent to an induction for any reason. If my baby needs to come out and isn’t coming naturally, then I’ll be having a csection. No compromises at all.

My spontaneous labour with DC2 was different. Yes, it was painful, but not on the same kind of scale as my induced labour. Contractions built up, then peaked and subsided.

Yeah. I think you’re being naive.

Agreed with @Haworthia and @Dinosauratemydaffodils.

It took me months to recover from my second birth. I lost 4 pints of blood and had two transfusions but I still felt (and looked) like a corpse for months. Whereas the recovery from my elective c-section took a week. The first week was hard, DH had to help me into and out of bed and onto and off the loo for example. It wasn’t glamorous but I was fine after a week.

The stitches from my extended episiotomy were worse than the ones from my ELCS as well, they burst open and became infected for starters...

I think it completely depends on the type of labour you have, how well you handle pain and how your body responds, because if you don't dialate or babies in the ideal position it can make everything worse!! I've heard that induction can be worse because you don't get the slow ramping up of labour pains like when it's bought on naturally so that can be hard to handle.
Personally for me, I was prepared for it to be the worst thing in the world and didn't realise I was actually in labour cus the beginning bit wasn't that bad. (Always had extremely painful periods and wouldn't get out of bed for days) it did just feel like bad period pains to start off so I went to bed and woke up in full blown labour, contractions like 5 minutes apart. The hospital kept telling me I couldn't be that far along because I could still talk through my contractions but I convinced them I needed to come in, car arrived to pick me up and I already needed to push.. waters broke as I arrived at hospital and she was born an hour later!!
It is different for everyone!! But it is very worth it, there's so many different types of pain relief avaliable if you are struggling and what got me through was knowing that it would end eventually!!!

Oh god these stories! I am trying for a baby but panicking about the birth.

I also feel anxious about the thought of something growing inside me!

Do epidurals (when they work) completely take the pain away?

Also, would you say the contractions are more painful that the actual birthing? And is the pain over immediately after giving birth?

If you reply, please tag me so I get a notification :)

TIA

Everyone's labours are different! My first was horrific and it nearly killed me. I don't remember much of it and I prefer it that way. I don't know why I decided to put myself through it again and yes I was terrified but my second labour was a dream no horror story and I remember that one, it hurt but was bareable for me and I was up having a shower within the hour of having him

Yeah, for me it was totally shit and actually way more painful than I'd imagined BUT it was only 24 hours or whatever out of my life (less than actually as I got the easy route out (sarcasm) and had to have an emergency section) so I would do it again, even though it was fairly horrendous. Pregnancy is another kettle of fish. I wouldn't do nine months of that again.

For me it was the pain on top of the utter exhaustion, I was in 'slow' labour for two days i.e. one contraction every ten minutes over 40 hours before I was even admitted into hospital. No sleep really contributed and then had another 18 hours of labour before they whisked me off for an emcs.

I must admit I had an excellent recovery from the c-section but have heard stories from others about theirs where they couldn't walk for 8 weeks.

Yes it hurts a lot, but the sense of excitement at the same time is amazing. First time was very painful for me but the second time was much easier and could barely be described as discomfort. YANBU.

I had an induced labour, the worst bit was the waiting which lasted about 36 hrs, then my waters were broken.

Yes it is painful but I found it a bearable pain and then pushing while hard was a relief. My labour lasted around 6 hours, had a bit of gas n air towards the end and during the stitching.

It was no where near as bad as all the 'helpful' people led me to believe it would be. Billions of women have done it, most without any pain relief and billions of women have chosen to do it more than once.

Grab the gas and air and don't let go!! If hurts like hell but somehow if they let you keep the mask it doesn't seem to matter ...

Like particularly savage period pain

x 1 million.

@vilanelle

The birthing is equally as bad as the contractions imo. The whole thing just feels like a seriously intense stomach bug including the uncontrollable pushing part complete with burning- sorry for TMI.

Epidurals take the pain away but run out after a while, they top it up but the top-ups don’t always work (didn’t for me) so the pain returns.

Pain does disappear once you’ve given birth and the placenta has gone.

I wouldn’t let birth deter you FWIW. I have had four DC so as traumatic as two of my births were, it was obviously completely worth it.

Well, if you think feeling your vagina being literally torn apart can’t be that bad then... I guess you’re not bu. And I did ask for a C section with my second as I did not want to go through that experience again.

I personally didn’t think it was that bad. It is intense and exhausting, but I didn’t find it to be especially ‘painful’. I’ve had two completely natural home births (probably why they were relatively smooth sailing for me). I used about 10 minutes of gas and air with the 2nd. Otherwise I just used a TENS and I laboured mostly by myself alone with both of them (as that works best for me). Midwives turned up just before they were both born.

But I also had two straightforward pregnancies and labour happened in an environment and with people around me that I felt comfortable with. Not everyone is that lucky. Personally, an induced hospital birth with an epidural scares me a bit! But I wouldn’t be nervous about another natural birth (even though I’m done having babies!).

Oh lord! I will never understand why people do this to someone who is pregnant. Christ! OP, good for you taking everything with a grain of salt. Everyone has a different birth and labor experience. From my perspective FEAR was the absolute worst part of it. Regardless of the actual pain of labor, which varies for everyone, the fact that people continue to have more than one child is evidence that the memory of the unpleasant parts fade enough for people to want to do it again. Also, not only varies from person to person, but from birth to birth. Congratulations on your new baby to be born! And good luck for a quick and healthy labor.