Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 ··· 26 27 28 ··· 32 33

Original poster

To think labour can’t be THAT bad?

802 replies

Bumpingbumping · 23/08/2019 13:15

Potentially being extremely naive, and of course this is excluding exceptional circumstances/emergency situations.

But aibu to think labour can’t be as horrific as people make out? I’ll be giving birth in 10 days time following an induction and everybody keeps asking me if I’m terrified and telling me how awful it will be.

Surely if it was THAT bad people just wouldn’t do it? Or would opt for a c section?

Again, feel free to hit me with the facts because I’m possibly being naive. But does anyone have any nice birth stories? Particularly following an induction?

OP posts:

redcupbluecup · 28/08/2019 16:54

I haven't read past your first post. I'm not reading 27 pages of birth stories. But I've had 3 children. 1 hospital birth, 1 induction 1 home birth. All were completely fine. No stitches, no instruments, nothing more than gas and air on the 3. For me my births were easy. That isn't always the case for everyone but not everyone has a horrific time.

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 28/08/2019 17:40

I guess that the truth is that labour can and does range from a breeze to utterly horrific, and that you can’t know ahead of time where on the spectrum of period-style-cramps to Holy-Mother-of-God-I-am-being-ripped-in-TWO your labour is going to be.

So you can plan (and hope) for the best, easiest labour - there is nothing wrong with that hope - but maybe you should temper it with a bit of pessimism too - know that labour can be painful and hard - but also know that most of us come through labour, even tough labours, unscathed - there are good forms of analgesia, and things that can help with the pain like massage, TENS, birthing pools - and we are tough. And labour is a productive pain - you know that there IS an end to the pain, and the end product is amazing.

Longlongsummer · 28/08/2019 17:50

There is an end to labour. Try the hypnosis labour apps they are good.

You will be induced which can be painful. The baby isn’t back to back? Which is also more painful.

My first birth was horrific and painful. But everyone is different. I was too weak to hold the baby and just wanted to crawl away to a hole by the end. Could not look after the baby. The second birth I had an EC.

Waxonwaxoff0 · 28/08/2019 17:55

It's different for different people. My friend's labour was a breeze.

My labour was horrendous and I was neglected by the hospital staff which led to me having to have a forceps delivery.

My labour experience is one of the reasons why I've chosen not to have any more children.

mybrilliantmind · 28/08/2019 18:23

how your labour turns out will depend on lots of factors. I've had four labours, all very different. However I do distinctly remember on one wondering how God can let you be in so much pain and not let you die. I'm not prone to dramatics and consider myself to have a very high pain threshold. On that occasion I was completely overwhelmed. I sincerely hope you have an easier time. Good Luck!

Tobebythesea · 28/08/2019 18:30

I gave birth for the second time two weeks ago and again it was horrific but worth it. Remember that there is always an epidural.

ilikethisusernamethemost · 28/08/2019 18:44

I found that no one can properly explain it. I tried to read everything I could and I watched so many one born every minute episodes that it made me panic even more and I was no more prepared for it. Every woman have a completely different experience. My MIL told me when I was expecting that it was "like shitting a football" and she wasn't wrong with that one!

Try to think about helping your recovery more than the actual birth. I made 'padsicles' which worked a treat to cool down my bits. (Google how to make them and keep them in your freezer ready!) also get yourself a bottle of lactulose to help with that first post birth poop! Really helps!

RaspberryRippleCrisps · 28/08/2019 19:28

OP,I thought you were going to turn out to be a man until I read that you are due to give birth in ten days!
Put it this way:- I gave birth just over 36 years ago,and I can remember thinking that the stories I'd heard about the pain of labour were exaggerated. They weren't. It was the worst pain I'd ever experienced in all my 19 years. But hey,everyone's different! I suppose it all depends on your pain threshold. I was lucky my labour lasted only 5 hours (which I'm told is quite short for a first baby) and managed to get through it with only gas and air. I didn't have any more children (not because of the pain by the way,but various other reasons,now being absolutely atrocious morning sickness),but if I had,I'm pretty sure that I would have requested an epidural.

Tempnamechange98765 · 29/08/2019 07:19

Why are contractions likened to bad period pains? I have never had period pains anything like that.

I read on here once, on a different thread, who said contractions feel like being crushed from the inside by a vice. Which I thought was a really good description.

Sayhellotothethings · 29/08/2019 07:37

Why are contractions likened to bad period pains? I have never had period pains anything like that.

I have endometriosis and the first 10 hours of my labour did feel similar to bad period pains for me.
The next 12 hours when I was on a hormone drip were something else. I thought I was going to die.

Tartan333 · 29/08/2019 07:41

Worth it but horrific and traumatic

mummmy2017 · 29/08/2019 07:42

Because when I used to have a normal period I would fold over in the street with a cramp, just like a labour contraction.

ThursdayLastWeek · 29/08/2019 07:45

My first Labour was so fucking awful I did have an ELCS with my second.

YouDoYou18 · 29/08/2019 07:49

It’s different for everyone. My first was rather traumatic and I’m now three weeks away from number two and it’s all flooding back and I’m starting to worry. However, we’re built to do this! At least that’s what I keep telling myself! If I’m honest, I like and admire your attitude and if you can keep it up until you’re in it you’ll be fine, because then natural instinct takes over and you’re just focused on getting it done! Good luck and congratulations

Iminagony · 29/08/2019 07:52

Haven't rtft.

Labour can be shit. No doubt about it. Mine was pretty awful. As a pp said, you don't forget but it is worth it.

I would have done it all again minutes later for the outcome!

Good luck. I hope yours goes well.

Kolo · 29/08/2019 07:57

Making out CS is an easy alternative adds to the sense of failure for people who attempt vag birth but need CS. It's bullshit

Yes! It was years before I could have read these sorts of posts, or listened to other women talking about their pain threshold without feeling like I was a complete failure and had just ‘bailed’ when things got tough.

malificent7 · 29/08/2019 08:00

I thought you meant the political party!

Muminthewoods19 · 29/08/2019 08:10

I had to do it with no pain relief, dilated to fast, it was the most horrendous pain I have ever felt, I'm not going to lie, but it does end, you don't die and you get a beautiful baby.

MrsNotNice · 30/08/2019 09:03

I wonder how those who deliver twins vaginally feel.

After pushing one then they have to do another.

My god, hats off to mums of twins who did it all natural. I can’t imagine it

Runningonempty84 · 30/08/2019 09:42

My granny delivered twins vaginally. This was the 1940s. She didn't know she was pregnant with twins until she'd delivered the first, and then realised there was another to come. She's very chilled when she tells that story, though

higgyhog · 30/08/2019 09:47

Yes, I had friends at school who were identical twins. their mother said that you don't really notice the birth of the second very much. I suppose in the pre scan days you would have been in real trouble if one of them was in a difficult position to deliver.

bananasandwicheseveryday · 30/08/2019 10:44

I would do through labour a hundred times rather than be pregnant again, even for one minute! I had hg throughout both pregnancies, spent around half the time in hospital each time and felt wretched fit none months each time. Didn't help that back then (30 years ago), hg wasn't even as well known or understood as it is now so I had a lot of people telling me to 'just' eat ginger biscuits/have a sweet drink/eat bland food, none of which are helpful when you cannot even keep a mouthful of water down!

In contrast, my labours were not especially long and were managed with gas and air and one injection of pethidine (do they still use that?) in one case, mepted (sp?) in the other. It was my pregnancies that convinced ne to limit my family to 2dcs, not the labours.

Sgtmajormummy · 30/08/2019 12:11

I have a friend with boy/girl twins and she often says with a shudder that she had two pregnancies and two births simultaneously.
Sounds horrific!

ErinO · 30/08/2019 13:35

After a 20 hour labour resulting in an EMCS at 9.5 cm dilated due to severe pre-eclampsia I just want to say that I still won't be opting for an ELCS when I have my next. The recovery is so hard. CS is a major surgery and is so downplayed it's ridiculous. Asking why people don't 'just opt for a c-section' certainly does add to the feeling of failure for c-section mums as a PP said.
Having said that, labour was really bad for me. My epidural failed and fell out of my back, baby was back to back so it really did hurt. But I'd do it all over again in a heartbeat, you don't forget the pain. The babies just make it worth it

DungeonDweller · 30/08/2019 14:43

but it does end, you don't die

Except... Mothers and babies die in childbirth every day. Yes, maternal and infant childbirth deaths aren't at 0.0% even in the UK.

Not helpful.

Flip

1 2 ··· 26 27 28 ··· 32 33