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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

“Suck your mum”

110 replies

Firedogs12 · 15/08/2019 17:49

DD aged 18 said this to me. I said it was offensive and asked her not to say it. She said she and DS aged 15 say it all the time (to each other and to their friends) and it doesn’t mean anything. She says it’s a generation thing. I said that my gran used to use n*gger but it doesn’t mean it’s ok.

AIBU to find it offensive? Do your teenagers say it?

OP posts:
22Giraffes · 15/08/2019 21:47

It wouldn't offend me more than any other insult tbh, but then I also seem to be in a minority of people who don't find the word "cunt" to be worse than shit/fuck/dickhead etc!

Yes it's designed to offend but no one actually literally wants you to go and suck your mum (Whatever that would entail) anymore than they want you to go and masturbate when they tell you to "go fuck yourself". I can't get too worked up about it.

sonjadog · 15/08/2019 21:48

«Yer da sells Avon» is brilliant.

bouncingraindrops · 15/08/2019 21:49

It's disgusting language. It's more worrying however that your 18 year old has zero respect for you.

Caucho · 15/08/2019 21:51

Sorry. Lost myself somewhere within the various comments. Of course it’s not acceptable for your kid to tell you to fuck off or call you a cunt but somehow it descended into the terminology which most of us aren’t familiar with. No yes it’s offensive. Supposed to be offensive and therefore out of order for your kids to say this. They could be as naive as some on here though in that while they know it’s bad, they might not think it’s that bad. Being cheeky v totally offensive

hmwhatsmynameagain · 15/08/2019 21:56

Isn't it odd how nonsensical words strung together can be seen as so offensive as they have been given offensive status by those uttering them

Original poster
Firedogs12 · 15/08/2019 22:04

She said it under her breath and only when I challenged her did she try to claim it was a “normal” phrase.

Yes to PPs I am well aware it doesn’t refer to breastfeeding.

DH and I have been suggesting to the DCs we start saying “suck your son/daughter” and see if they like it.

OP posts:
wibblywobblytummytumtum · 15/08/2019 22:06

It is indeed prison talk, derived from Jamaican patois. Saying it to the wrong person wouldn’t end well around here so your kids should be careful how they use it.

My other half is Jamaican and he doesn't use it, even in jest... guaranteed to start fight with certain people

Watchingthyme · 15/08/2019 22:08

Oh away with you

It’s just teenagers being teenagers. It’ll be hilarious one day

Merrysnow · 15/08/2019 22:27

Urgh I think that’s vile. I cannot believe your 18yo has such little respect for you. My young teen wouldn’t dream of saying something like that to me!

Original poster
Firedogs12 · 15/08/2019 22:33

Extra brownie points to those posters whose DC wouldn’t dream of speaking to their parents like that. Well done! Thanks!

OP posts:
Merrybells · 15/08/2019 22:34

@Firedogs12 perhaps you should’ve demanded greater respect from your children and raised them not to be so impolite. Well done to you! Not!

Watchingthyme · 15/08/2019 22:35

@Merrysnow
Hilarious
Young teen. I’m sure they’re like the sainted mother Mary

Watchingthyme · 15/08/2019 22:36

@Merrybells
Well you’re a piece of work. Blimey. What happened to being kind.

Merrysnow · 15/08/2019 22:38

@Watchingthyme they’re not saintly but they would never get away with saying that to an adult. I don’t think that’s unreasonable 😂

20viona · 15/08/2019 22:43

😂😂😂

HeresMe · 15/08/2019 22:50

Why do teenagers want to talk like they are in a Jamaican prison it's bizarre even in my day we didn't have this crap.

When people saying tings thats more crap.

I appreciate English evolves, but there is evolving and talking complete bollocks.

billy1966 · 15/08/2019 22:54

OP, clearly this is hugely vulgar, disrespectful language to be using to parents.

Take a breath and think about that.

Please try not to be surprised that lots of people wouldn't put up with it and have brought up their children not to ever attempt to speak to them in such a dreadful manner.

That does not for a moment mean that they have not to call their teenagers out when they have been rude and to tell them that they will not tolerate it.

Original poster
Firedogs12 · 15/08/2019 22:57

Yes glad to have had the almost unanimous IANBU but could do without the smugness... however this is AIBU of course...

OP posts:
cheeseandcracker · 15/08/2019 22:59

Ha, me and my sister used to say this all the time. It didn't mean anything at all, it was just something to say. As well as.... I know you are but what am I?

wifesupremacist · 15/08/2019 23:00

.

“Suck your mum”
HennyPennyHorror · 15/08/2019 23:01

Someone asked why it's always Mothers being mentioned in these insults. I laughed (simple mind) when I heard a drag queen say "Your Dad" as a way of insulting someone else on stage.

Another drag queen, when asked what hobbies they had said "Your Dad"

As others have said, it is a low insult and I'd be speaking to both kids about NEVER saying it again. People will judge.

JamieVardysHavingAParty · 15/08/2019 23:07

Ha, me and my sister used to say this all the time. It didn't mean anything at all, it was just something to say.

I suspect that if you'd said it to the wrong person, you'd have found it did mean something very quickly.

TessTackle · 15/08/2019 23:11

The repeated claims that this phrase is from “prison talk” are astounding Grin

TessTackle · 15/08/2019 23:12

It’s also definitely not from Patois either for gods sake.

It is what is says on the tin.

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