To take a 5 month old on a girls' weekend to Paris

[Patapouf]

Has anyone done this and has tips to make it less stressful? I know the baby will get nothing out of it but I am not ready to leave him at home with DH for 2 nights just yet and I'm desperate to make the most of mat leave.

Travelling by Eurostar, probably stay in an Airbnb. Planning a bit of sightseeing but mainly mooching about, sitting in cafés and stocking up on skincare and food or maybe not having seen the value of the pound

Friends will be hands on and help as much as they can but I'm very anxious that it will be disastrous. Baby is BF (not going well), but mostly EBM so worrying about the logistics of expressing or BF out and about. I also can't imagine trying to manoeuvre a pram on the narrow pavements. I know babies live in Paris, I did too once, but I'm a worrier.

Can I make this work? How can I pack light?

I suppose my AIBU should really be how can I be less nervous about travelling with a baby?

I think everyone's being shitty to OP. She knows both her baby and her friends and has the best idea of whether they'll actually mind. FWIW I've done short breaks with friends both with and without DC and both have been fine. Five month olds are great as well. They're usually done with the bonkers cluster feeding, are immobile but old enough to be interested in looking at new things and people, and aren't yet so wedded to a routine that you need to be trapped in a hotel room with them by 7pm. I'd absolutely do it. OP if I was in your shoes I'd take a comfy sling and the buggy. If you're not already cosleeping and are nervous then don't start on holiday - I've coslept with both of mine from the word go and HATE doing it in strange beds. The hotel you're going to might be able to give you a travel cot though. Make sure you've got a good book if you need to stay by yourself with the baby for a couple of hours while your friends do anything, and take three times as many clothes for the baby as you think you might need and a big wet bag (plus a couple of spare tops for you) so you're not worried about accidents or air sickness. To pp who said you all have to leave if baby has a leaky poo... what?! Surely friends would just stay in the queue and OP would go off to find somewhere to change the baby, then rejoin them...? It's Paris, not the Amazon rainforest. If you'd contemplate going out for the day to your local town centre with your baby, or for a pootle round the nearest city, you can go to Paris.

I think people are missing the point of this thread entirely.

OP go, bring the carry cot. If you're taking the eurostar it may be a lot easier than airport travel. It will be a lovely relaxed trip.

but whoever said the best outcome possible will be that I feel relieved the weekend wasn't a disaster is right. I do think that it will be something to 'get through' rather than enjoy

Pata I would only think that if your friends were not fully onboard with the idea and unwilling to be flexible. Babies can be really transportable, I certainly found mine to be. We did many holidays abroad with them. However if your friends were party nuts or incapable of letting you head back to the hotel with the baby if things don’t go to plan then I’d be worried. But from your posts it sounds like they are on board.

As an aside I would find the responses to this thread more anxiety inducing than any of my trips with young babies ever were.

It's up to you but the thought of the logistics of getting everything through security, onto the Eurostar, and then a Metro from the GdN, being solely responsible for all the stuff; one of my friends holding him while I speed-ate my meal; navigating summer crowds with a pram in potential rain; a bad night meaning everyone in the Air BnB is up from 4am; trying to express, storing and carrying EBM (I breastfed and he ate shedloads at 5 months as he was almost ready for solids)... it makes me want to cry! DS was 5.5 months when DH and I took him to Cornwall, at which point he had outgrown the pram carrycot so needed a travel cot, and it took a carload of stuff plus 2 of us to manage.

Yes go and take him with you. Eat all the bread and cheese you can and have a great time!

What a bunch of nasty whingers. The type that would be rolling their eyes and moaning at each other quietly because someone's child interferes with their good time. Here's an idea, don't go to Paris with people who have a baby because then you won't have to deal with that, and then also realise that not everyone thinks that way. Some people love their friends AND their children and don't see them as a huge encumbrance and just want to be with them.

I assume you have sorted his passport already? Xx

Just to add. I think just under crawling age is the absolute perfect age to travel with a baby. At 5 months he will probably be able to sit in a highchair (bring a small cushion to help with bigger highchairs) to play with some toys and interact with you all and save your arms so you can eat freely, but he probably won't be on solid food so you won't have to be distracted feeding or clearing up after him. He will still likely have 2 naps a day. He stays put when you plonk him down with some toys. He's interested in anything and everything from small toys to spoons and empty cups so there is constant entertainment at hand, he won't interrupt your conversations with ridiculous questions. Holidays with my kids this age have always been a total breeze. If you were talking about a toddler then I would be warning you off it. Filter the air bnbs so they show one that have travel cots and all is good. You don't need to take loads of stuff. Their clothes are small and don't take up much room. Take short rompers (if summer) and sleepsuits if cooler, these can then be worn day or night and you don't have to worry about matching if a nappy leaks or changing into pyjamas of they fall asleep on the way back to the Airbnb in the evenings.

Are you planning to stay in a hotel? If s9 what will you do in the evenings when baby is asleep - it will be tricky to go out for dinner even if he will sleep in the pushchair and you don't wasnt to sit in a hotel room from 8pm every night. I would suggest an airbnb so you can have somewhere to sit other than your bedroom. Also somewhere to go and entertain baby in the morning rather than in your room. Plus it will be easier to pump, if you need to as there will be a kettle and sink for cleaning/sterilising.

I wouldn't go. I think you're friends are just being polite.

For logistics of expressing, would an Elvie pump be an option? Also not sure if you're still sterilising but by 5 months I wasn't bothering except occasionally , just give the bottles a good wash for a couple of days.

I had to put dd on the floor as Eurostar insisted I collapse the buggy and I was on my own. I had a great weekend but had a fully equipped base with friends with babies same age who lived in a central flat. I wouldn’t have gone alone in any other circumstance. But you know your own limits you may be a superwoman with a perfectly behaved clockwork type baby - I certainly wasn’t!

You don't need to sterilise for breastmilk anyway - advice has recently changed. Just cleaning in hot soapy water is fine.

www.parentclub.scot/articles/breast-milk-storage-and-bottle-hygiene

You can absolutely travel with a baby, especially at that age. Honestly, some people are coming across as rather uptight for suggesting it cannot be done, especially in the context of "can't have your cake and eat it too". It's just a short trip to Paris. I took DD hiking in the mountains when she was that age, together with my best friend, and we had a great time.

Then again, as I said before, if it makes you nervous, you probably will be nervous, and won't have as good or relaxing a time as you could have if you could just leave DS with DH for a few days. He seems to think you need the break, and with you EBF I can understand why.

I think you shouldn't go at all. You will struggle. I did when I took my baby to Paris at 8 months old and that was with family who were more than happy to help and take over. I left more exhausted than when I went! Your friends are being polite as others have mentioned, there's no way that they'll enjoy it as much with a baby there (especially not being parents themselves). It's a waste of money considering that you arent even looking forward to the trip - it isn't exactly a break if you have your baby with you, is it?

The posters on this thread are a lovely range, some of you are as uptight as me and some of you are as laid back as I aspire to be. Some of you seem really over invested in whether I take my child on this trip- MN is bizarre!

Everyone in RL keeps telling me it's easier to travel with a baby than a toddler, but I suppose that doesn't make travel with a baby easy

Thank you to the PP that suggested that fb group, maybe I'll find the tips I foolishly came to MN in search of.

I love Paris, but I know it isn't going anywhere if I do give this trip a miss.

I think you're getting a really hard time. I took my DS on the train (4/5 hours travel) every month since he has been 7 weeks to now at 6.5 months to visit family. I pack super light. Basics for us both in a backpack. I've done sling and pram. DS is very easy going and rarely upset so it's always been smooth.

Sling is great for mobility and hands free but DS doesn't sleep well in it so I need pram but I have a bugaboo bee which is small.

You need to just bear in mind you might need to pop off occasionally and leave them to it.

Will you have your own room and a double bed? Goes without saying you obviously couldn't share a room with them.

You know your baby and your friends best...

I got a hand pump (Tommy Tippee) with a single bottle and a lunch box like built in steriliser. Everything fit in the lunch box. Really portable and cost 20 quid. I used an ice pack for milk. The French are fine with BF in my experience but I have heard (probably on here) discretion is key since it is not particularly common over there.

Given the context especially friends who don't want crazy nights out I honestly don't see the problem. With some planning re feeding and a good sling / plan walks to coincide with naps it should be lovely.
I took my first on all sorts of city breaks until he could walk (and had a sibling on the way when some of the fun had to stop!) and had an ace time.
A five month old still naps so you can enjoy lunch again with a bit of planning and timing, an Airbnb would be a good idea for the evening but we used to take a tiny stroller out sometimes and if he fell asleep go out for dinner! Enjoy it OP Paris is lovely and kid friendly and one day you can show him photos of all the fantastic sights he slept through :)
It's hardly a mad weekend in Ibiza we're talking about here - sounds completely doable as much as anything with a five month old, and will probably do you loads of good to see your friends!

I have travelled with a baby many times. Not at the expense of someone else's holiday though!

Your friends might be too nice to say it but no one wants a baby on a girls' trip.

You're being rude OP. People aren't being weird, they're answering your AIBU.

It's hard to give tips though! Unless they are things like book an Airbnb with a travel cot and high chair, use a changing backpack and chuck your purse in it rather than have your own handbag, and take a baby carrier for when you have to fold the pushchair on the train. They make it easier but not easy.

If you're friends don't yet have kids then they really aren't going to get how much the baby will dictate your time. I don't think it will be very enjoyable.

You're being rude OP. People aren't being weird, they're answering your AIBU

Nope she is getting frustrated with people coming down on her like a tonne of bricks. Perfectly natural for that to get someone’s back up in my opinion.