To expect parents to teach their little children not to approach my dog?

[joystir59]

It happens all the time- young child screams "Little doggie" and reaches towards Dog with outstretched hands. My dog hates little children doing this and would probably snap at them if they managed to actually get their hands on him. Why don't parents teach their children to ignore strange dogs?

It happened again today. Standing with Dog in a queue to get coffee. Very short lead. Dog at heel, looking forward. Child of about 8 comes in to the cafe specifically to approach Dog,hand outstretched. I said 'No!' and followed this somewhat stern rebutal with a gentler explanation that he should never approach a strange dog in that way, he must ask the owner, because some dogs do not like to be touched. Dog ignored child throughout. Child and nearby parents looked askance.

So I repeat: parents please do not let your children approach strange dogs. Teach your children to ignore them.

If you look at how adult dogs interact with each other, they follow a delicate process of approaching and then sniffing, giving clear clues about their mood and intent and waiting for signals before drawing in closer.

So I repeat.

Don't own a snappy dog. If you need such a potentially dangerous toy/accessory get something that can be kept in a cage/tank.

How ridiculous!

Every dog has it in them to snap under the circumstances. That’s including the ones who have had idyllic upbringings. So no one would ever own a dog if ‘don’t own a snappy dog’ was a thing.

What about every abused dog in rescue, can they not have loving homes with people who care for them, just because some brain dead idiot may have a problem with it?

The way I see it the only ones who need to live in a tank are the ones who can’t see there’s room for all of us in this world as long as all of us respect each other. That includes ‘snappy’ dogs who actually just don’t have the patience to deal with you allowing your child into their personal space.

speakout
Much as I'm not a fan of snappy dogs (and in my experience they are usually small and snappy and irritating), if they're on a lead and the owner is being responsible owner then it's nobody else's business.

If I see a small potentially snappy dog, I don't take my bigger dog near them if we are on the lead and if we are off lead then I call them back as soon as I see them.

It's hardly difficult for parents to apply the same common sense.

I used to be terrified of dogs and would freeze up around them (never had a negative experience), but I think now as a dog owner it's because I wasn't brought up how to behave around them properly.

Don't own a snappy dog. If you need such a potentially dangerous toy/accessory get something that can be kept in a cage/tank

Alternatively if you see a dog being walked on a lead control your dc and stop them from entering the dogs space. It isn't difficult.

Dog owners put their dogs on leads to control them around people and other dogs (and wildlife). If parents kept control of their offspring no dc would invade an on lead dogs space and no children would be snapped at.

"Don't own a snappy dog. If you need such a potentially dangerous toy/accessory get something that can be kept in a cage/tank."

What a brilliant, revolutionary idea. I'm sure no one has ever thought of that. Right up there with "don't have badly behaved children".

Don't own a snappy dog. If you need such a potentially dangerous toy/accessory get something that can be kept in a cage/tank.

It doesn’t work like. 2 puppies same litter you won’t at 8 weeks old know which is the snappy puppy and which isn’t. Perhaps you could have snappier breeds than others. But quite frankly for every snappy dog of that breed you could have a docile soppy one of the same breed

Tabby if parents can’t control their kids they should be on reins/holding hands all the time.

My son knew not to touch strange dogs from very early on. It’s not safe to leave a child who doesn’t respond immediately to an adult to not be under very close supervision. They could get hit by a bike/walk into the road etc, but some parents seem to think everyone loves their little darlings.

I understand your point OP and I teach my toddler constantly not to approach dogs. My lesson is constantly undone by dog owners encouraging their dogs to approach him for attention (without asking me, his mother, if I mind this. I do, very much. He is a dog lover, I am very nervous of dogs.)

At the end of the day, regardless of what most dog owners wish, the law gives the child more rights in every situation. As someone has said up thread,

the child matters more.

In the eyes of human society and UK law this is the case. You may not like it, but if your dog poses a risk to a (badly behaved, out of control) child, you are expected to minimise that risk, or face your dog being put down if it reacts badly to a naughty child bothering it.

Every parent who lets their child approach strange dogs is an idiot. no other word for it.
You wouldn’t let them approach a moving car either, would you? the best driver can miss your child, the loveliest dog can snap. its not a risk worth taking, and its shared responsibility between parent and dog owner.

btw, i’m aware that the dog would be put down if it bit. however, that’s after your child got bitten. not worth the risk.

@my2bundles If dog owners are going to take their dog around small children they need to teach them how to behave around small children.

How do I know where small children are going to be when I take my well behaved dogs for a walk?

OP, I have always taught DDs to ask before approaching dogs. That said, they are children, and oddly don't ever always follow instructions to the letter.
If your dog can't stand in a queue at a coffee shop without snapping at a child that happens to start approaching shouting 'doggie' then they should be muzzled. You can't expect everyone in the world to give your dog an exclusion zone of one metre because they snap.

I've had small children run up behind my horse squealing and grabbing his tail. I've had to remove toddlers who were playing on road in the High Street (it's a fairly busy through route with lots of parked cars) and take them back to parents who didn't see the problem. I've had to wade in to rescue a toddler who had fallen into a pond while the mum sat chatting
With her friend. Nothing about sloppy parenting surprises me anymore.
To those who say they would kick a dog that came up to their child - if your brat comes running up to my saintly horse or soppy, on the lead dog and annoys them, do I have permission to kick your child?

All I am asking is that parents educate their children on how to behave around strange dogs. It astonishes and appals me that they are happy for their children to make contact with an unknown animal! As others have said, they wouldn't let their children dive into water or wander into the road. Why let them touch a dog they don't know. Dog belongs to me, I get to say if someone can approach him. I love children and would never want a child to be hurt, and always say no, just to be safe, even when Dog looks as if he is happy to meet the child.

Can I just point out that if a dog is child shy due to previous abuse by a child then why should it be forced to accept children near it? Would we expect the same from abused wives? Or children? To have to cope with people that reminded them of their abuse being in their personal space?

And may I also point out that the OP’s dog hasn’t snapped and may never, particularly if he’s left alone as he should be. She is being responsible and cautious by not allowing her dog to go up to people.

The problem is children coming up to her dog. And that fault lies with the parents.

I have the opposite problem, parents see my teddy bear of a Rottweiler & whisk their darling children out of her way, before cooing & crowding my chihuahua who would tear them limb from limb if only she was big enough & had any teeth left

Why don't parents teach their children to ignore strange dogs?

Why don't you muzzle your dog around young children?

Probably the same reason kids don't ignore your dog

OP I think almost everyone on here has agreed that of course it's sensible to try and teach young children not to approach strange dogs. However we have also noted that young children can take months to absorb that message and cannot always be totally restrained, and that if your dog cannot be socialised, it's up to you to restrain it. I think effectively most people will be speciesist (a term used up thread) and expect that if it's a choice between muzzling/leashing a child, versus a dog, it would be the dog to be restrained. Imho simply because of the greater potential for the dog to harm the child as opposed to the reverse.

I'm on both sides of this. DC have always been taught from a very young age that they don't approach any dog without my (not the owners although obviously I would seek the owners permission) permission. Even then they are allowed to do so quietly and gently. They are not allowed to touch without allowing the dog to see and smell them first. I've taught them how to speak near a dog.

Rarely do I give permission...frankly I don't know that dog so even if an owner says they are fine I tend to make an excuse. Generally I keep them the other side of me and we simply wave hello.

We also have a dog , she is unbelievably gentle and quiet however I still am extremely careful both if others approach and with my own DC who have had it drilled into them how they treat an animal.

It's my responsibility both ways and if there was a chance that my dog could snap that's on me as the owner. Frankly if your dog is at risk of reacting you shouldn't be taking him / her anywhere near where there are children because ultimately both sides are unpredictable.

My dog has had a interesting history and because of that I cannot always be sure. She doesn't bark, follows commands , and is ridiculously gentle and loving...but she is a dog.

Same way my DC are and have been very carefully taught ...but again they are children so they can be unpredictable (3 year old particularly) so as the adult and the owner it is entirely my responsibility to manage it all.

That includes keeping the dog under control and my DC near mine and other dogs.

Basically yes children should be taught to be responsible but ultimately you are in control of the animal.

Of course children should be taught not to approach dogs but dogs who are likely to snap s should be kept away from areas where there are likely to be lots of children People's rights are more important thsn dogs . My GS is afraid of dogs and wouldn't dream of approaching them because he has been terrified by dogs jumping up at him in parks.Which I think is a shame. My 15month old Gd loves them and always shouts and points when she sees them. And while we would never let her approach a dog. It's hard to stop a toddler getting excited. Dogs should be under very tight control anywhere near children

YANBU. I taught mine from a very early age to ask first.

My dogs a softy and loves if anyone comes to talk to him but I don't encourage it.

I was standing talking to a friend while out on a walk (we live rurally so in fields etc) when a toddler appeared from seemingly nowhere and jumped on him from behind. He got the shock of his life, as did I. His mum gave a little laugh and said 'oh he always does that he loves dogs' I was so pissed off. One because the little boy could have hurt my dog by jumping on him and secondly because if he'd bitten in shock, he would have been the one everyone would call a dangerous dog.

Also OP so many dog owners are not like you, they delight in children being interested in their dog & actively encourage children to engage a dog. Children are confused by these mixed messages. If you want children to ignore dogs, you need to get other dog owners to stop encouraging children to interact with their dogs!!