To ask how you got rich

[getmeacupoftea]

We're struggling financially to put it bluntly. DH is full time in the military and I do as many hours as I can around the kids and his work schedule. I want ask what people have done to be in a comfortable position with their money. I'm driven and ready to work my ass off, just not sure which direction to go. I feel I'm still relatively young and have already got my maternity leave etc done and dusted. I know money isn't everything but I'm sick of having to skimp and save for things.

You might view my lifestyle as scrimping but I think carefully about all expenditure so that I only spend on things that matter to me.

I pay myself first by saving as soon as I get paid - half our savings go into our investment account, half into our offset mortgage, plus pots for travel and other short/medium term savings. Any money saved during the month - bills that come in under budget, keeping our food bill down, every couple of pounds from Quidco - all goes into savings (2/3 investment, 1/3 travel).

I'd rather spend on travel than waste money elsewhere and my overall approach has paid the deposit on our house. I'm the main earner but have health problems, so my long-term goals are to go part-time at work and to retire before I'm utterly clapped out.

I suppose it depends on your definition of "rich". My family have money and when I and my siblings inherit we won't really need to think about money any more. However we all hope that day will never come because I adore my parents. They encouraged us to make our own way in life with a huge amount of emotional support but not much financial as they felt we would benefit more from finding our own feet. We've all done ok. I think having the "right" background helps, good education and whatnot plus we are all above average intelligence. DH and I are comfortable I would say. We both work in fairly senior roles in the public sector, I am part time he is FT. I watch what we spend as a force of habit but I am probably more watchful than I really need to be. I think people who know us would be surprised at our financial situation because neither of us are interested in designer clothes or accessories and posh hairdos so we don't "look" very affluent. I drive a very nice car but it's a good few years old. I won't upgrade it because I love it. DH drives a decrepit banger as he really doesn't care what he drives as long as it gets him from A-B. So he'll probably drive that until it dies. Our house is fairly small but hardly any mortgage. Although that will change soon as we are about to double the size of it. We have savings. I never "feel" particularly well off though. I do worry about money. I just always feel very conscious that for the vast majority of us, we are only a few stretches of bad luck away from the gutter and so I am one of life's savers as opposed to spenders.

We have no DC, which makes a massive difference.

DH and I have both always had the savings habit and the ability to say No to things that weren’t essential. We’ve therefore always lived within our means and saved - sometimes only a little and sometimes a lot.

In our younger days we tried really hard to limit spending on credit cards and to pay off as soon as possible, and to save up for house improvements rather than take a loan. It’s just an inbuilt attitude that you don’t buy what you can’t pay for.

That has meant that when windfalls have come (redundancy payout, inheritance) we’ve basically just carried on as before, because there was nothing we wanted to have or do which we were prevented from doing by lack of money. So the nest egg has grown and we will be retiring early.

I should say that we are not penny pinchers and will happily spend for the things which enhance our lives such as concert tickets, meals out etc. But we don’t spend money just because we’ve got it. We both rate certain things as “too expensive” even though we could afford them.

Designer brands and expensive grooming just don’t feature in our lives. I will pay £50-£80 for a pair of good quality leather shoes, but I can’t comprehend what would possess someone to pay £500 for a pair. My car was bought new 8 years ago, but still runs perfectly, so why would I buy a new one just because I could? I will change it when it becomes more trouble than it’s worth.

Mumoftwoyoungkids Thank you for your honesty. Very refreshing.

Do you want to be rich or just comfortable? Honestly I think being rich, some of it is luck, tbh.

My DH is in the army and thankfully due to his hard work we are now more comfortable at 30 than we were at 20.

We took advantage of the pay advance to purchase a house, we are now more thrifty with money (bulk buying meat at the butchers, having home cooked lunches to take to work) than I was at 20 (no idea how we ever managed on £30k combined). I purchase alot of my clothes on eBay or in the sale or at discount centres.

I've been able to study whilst at work which has added a good £14k to my annual income over the past 5-years.

Could you OH look at re-trading to a section that offers higher pay? That's if he wants too of course.

In terms of your career, could you be a relief chief? My friends OH does this and can take home upwards of £1k per week (I believe). He has used his contacts to go in to failing pubs, training the kitchen and re-jig the menu to increase the custom.

Ultimately you have to cut your cloth and its better to be happy with what you have, rather than worry about what you don't.

Not rich as we rely on monthly income, but we would be comfortable enough if one of us for some reason became unable to work.

Stable relationship and good qualifications. Lots and lots of hard work as no inheritance and no parental support to get onto the property ladder. Lots of parental support though emotionally, my single mum especially pushed hard for me to get good qualifications.

We also live in a fairly cheap area where our money goes far. Our house is cheap and we have a pretty simple lifestyle. DH is a junior doctor and I work in financial services, joint income about £90k. My salary has probably peaked as taking things slower now on the workplace since we have a DS. DH still stably climbing up the medical ladder.

I had a vague idea of the number of businesses that fail so I checked it out. Many say start a business but it’s not easy.

8 out of 10 entrepreneurs who start businesses fail within the first 18 months, according to Bloomberg. It's a staggering statistic. Fully 80% of businesses will fail in less than two years.

Hiscox some ways to mitigate failure on there too

I worked in X industry, but used to help my friend at weekends for catering functions, weddings etc. My friend offered me a job with further training. I decided to stay in my industry & my job progressed well.
I often wonder how my life would have been if I had taken his job offer

I've always had 3 or 2 jobs
I've continued to work overtime

I save some & spend some

I've also been lucky, been in the right place at the right time. I've taken most of the opportunities that have been offered to me

Thanks so much for your replies everyone. I'm heading into dreaded work now but I'll have a good read when I get out.

Adding to others - my turnover may be good but I haven't had enough for a deposit and couldn't dream of private school for example when I have kids. I'll have to work even harder for those things as someone self sufficient. I do feel my friends who have been given £20 / 25k + really don't get how almost impossible it is to save this amount by my age (32) single and without any family help. I earn more than almost all my friends and am the only one not on the property ladder as I've had no help. Not usually one to feel sorry for myself but it is a bit shit!

Sorry the £20 / 25k I refer to is for a deposit. I wish!!

I am not rich but I invested in properties to rent out.

We are NOT rich but according to mumsnet we are. Our joint income is £90k. We both went to uni, both have degrees and I have a qualification at masters level. We have both been working in our careers now for 12 years- both still not ‘at the top’ although I’m only one step away from the £54k next rung which is second from top in my career. I think our top joint salary is £120k based on our chosen career paths. We are both in our 30s so not doing to badly. My parents are wealthy academics - and I went to a grammar school- but the OH was not raised in a wealthy family.

Studied engineering
Was willing to work overseas in some 'interesting' places
Became specialist in my field
Became freelance

To define "rich": If you make 100k a year and are female, you're in the top 1% of UK earners. For men, the figure is 200k a year.

Some define rich as double the average national wage, that would make 60k a year "rich" I think.

I am not in the UK but I make about 100k sterling a year in a comparable economy. 12 years ago, I was making 7k a year. Steps I took:

• Learned how to seem posh via the schools I was sent to (some private, some grammar, then my parents ran out of money and it was straight comp)
• Studied only what I could get a scholarship for (languages)
• worked as a waitress for 10 years to pay the difference between the scholarship and the student loan top up
• did a job that includes lots of public speaking and talking to strangers, i.e. a job that terrifies many people
• moved to a place with high paying jobs
• concentrated on building my network
• maintained a reputation for meticulous, well thought out work under very high pressure.

I work in internal communications and strategy consulting.

It's mostly that I am white, speak English, have an unusual posh sounding accent, am tall and slim with good hair, am good under stress, and know how to make and keep friends. That's it. That's how I made my money.

I think what this thread shows is there are lots of ways to skin a cat! You have to find the approach that fits best with your existing skills set.

What’s interesting on this thread is that it doesn’t seem to be down to luck very much at all or even a wealthy family. Most people seem to have got good qualifications and worked hard in their career early on.

What’s interesting on this thread is that it doesn’t seem to be down to luck very much at all or even a wealthy family. Most people seem to have got good qualifications and worked hard in their career early on.

Lot easier to get good qualifications if you are lucky enough to be born clever. Lot easier to get good qualifications if your family are wealthy and you are in a classroom with 12 others rather than 29 others. Lot easier to work hard early on if you are lucky enough to be healthy in your early 20s.

But - yes - you are right - Mumsnet is full of a certain demographic. (Well educated, intelligent, middle class.)

@Walkmehome bear in mind that no-one is going to come and share a story here about how their parents gave them their wealth.

People will imagine that their hard work got them somewhere when it was actually their parents' money, connections, choices in educating them, etc. It's easy to work hard in low paid, high prestige internships when you know that your parents can help you when you are properly skint.

Wealth is typically down to luck. The stories you hear on this thread are not representative.

I think it's partly luck. For every person here who worked hard, got onto a good degree course and did well enough at interview to get a good job then got promoted several times, there are probably 100 people who tried to do the same and just found they were rejected at every turn. Being conventionally attractive and well healed to begin with is also a great advantage. We don't really live in a true meritocracy - it's a nice story we tell ourselves.

You'll need to retrain to earn more money.

I work in Finance and am on £70,000pa. No degree but plenty of finance qualifications.

I also use topcashback whenever I buy things online and for switching providers and I've made over £2k from that.

Mm. Having left home at 16 and worked to put myself thru college and Uni, I perhaps lacked the strategy and life skills to see things clearly. Plus bedsits ate up money.
So at nearly 40 I'm going back to uni to qualify in a decent profession and get stuff sorted while I've still got time. And look for a rich husband 😉

@getmeacupoftea stay working in your current role whilst you research the food industry some more. Find what is not being done or could be done better. Not always necessary to reinvent the wheel, just modify it. Once you have found what you want to do, research/learn everything you can about sales. Your business will not do well if you don't know how to sell. These resources can be found at any good library. Don't go to uni now, I don't think it's priority and not quite needed for your industry

Manage home finances with an iron fist - cut back on luxuries but don't get rid of them altogether (it's good to have an incentive and something as a 'treat') , create separate accounts from your work wages (this is why I said stay employed for now) these accounts should cover emergency, childcare/household bills, personal savings etc. Pay down any debt that you have fast (give yourself a target to do this in). Whilst doing this, look for better employment in your industry, this will help you with all the above.

You will be tired, but if you do this and are dedicated to the cause you will get there. Self employment is the quickest way to make money quickly as the possibilities are endless. Only leave full time employment once you are making serious profits consistently. Many will say you can leave earlier but you have responsibilities, not fair on them. I would also say stick to the industry you know, it's where your strength is. Be observant at work in terms of what can be done better and incorporate it into your own.

Hope this helps you achieve your goal.

I realised early on that the way out of my rather difficult life was to get top grades, a degree and then pursue a career that would pay big money. So I did. Essentially I sold my soul to the City for my 20s which meant that by the time I started having kids (29) I’d banked a lot and soon after I’d paid off the mortgage.

You do t have that option, but there are changes you could look to make that would improve both your work life balance and involve more cash (perhaps after a short drop for training). Accountancy is one area. Given your experience there may also be something you could
Do in food/food standards/quality?

The only other thing I do is to minimise outgoings. Partly I. The name of the environment I only buy secondhand clothes for the kids and I limit them to four pairs of shoes (trainers, school shoes, wellies, boots). All outgrown clothes are either stored for the next child to grow into or sold if that’s an option. Trips out are minimal and often free or done because I can get a discount. Books come from the library. Clothing is repaired if possible. We walk and cycle - we don’t run a car.

We limit take out and we limit trips to the cinema to four times a year (done with free or discounted tickets again).

And we save and save via regular savers - the money goes out to the savings account before we’ve really clocked that it’s there. So we never think of it as being available to spend.