AIBU: Nanny left a bag of her own vomit in my kitchen. What to do?

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Today, among my nanny's bags, I saw a bag that looked like it was filled with vomit. When I looked inside, it turns out it was indeed a bag of her vomit (and a sleeve of cookies). I've had suspicions about strange behaviour before... small lies, denying when things break, not taking great care of our home... but this takes the cake. This is quite a difficult situation because she's a lovely person but I've felt for a while she has quite bad emotional issues. But now I wonder whether she's suited to look after a child. What if my young child had found the bag? Why, if she was sick, could she not have been sick in the toilet? Why didn't she throw the bag away? This is a step too far for me, but I'm wondering whether this falls under gross misconduct or if it's not considered so severe in the eyes of employment law. Any advice on what to do?

I would gues she’s bulimic and would rather you didn’t smell/see evidence in the toilet?

Are you sure she's not pregnant

Today, among my nanny's bags, I saw a bag that looked like it was filled with vomit. When I looked inside,... etc

Why were you looking through Nannys things?

I'm wondering whether this falls under gross misconduct or if it's not considered so severe in the eyes of employment law.

So being ill is a GM, immediate dismissal is it? I'd like to see that at tribunal

Where was the bag? What were in the other bags? Why were you looking through them?
Do you think she is bulimic? Do you think she needs help rather than the sack?

Well, you can say nothing or ask her. There's not much else to chose between.

If it was someone in my home looking after my kids then i'd do the later and be honest and tell her i'd found it and see what she said.

I'm confused as to how that would constitute gross misconduct 🧐

Yea right

Have you got any concern about the way she looks after your child?
If not, I’d say respect her privacy and stop looking through her things

Why would anyone open and sniff a bag of vomit. If this is true then poor nanny

Unless she left your children unattended in a dangerous position to go vomit in a bag, I don’t see how it’s GM?
I would ask her if everything is ok - early stages of pregnancy I had a bag of vomit with me almost constantly. (Although I also Disposed of and replaced with a fresh bag obviously!)

She’s doing you a favour not blocking your pipes ,vomit is bugger for blocking the toilet .

For some reason i pictured the vomit bag in the middle of the kitchen floor with some other carrier bags with it (unlikely i know) which coloured my gut reaction. In that scenario i would ask her about it.

However now i'm wondering where the bag was and yes, what made OP check it?

Why are you going through the nanny’s things. And no being sick at work does not constitute gross misconduct, stop being ridiculous.

😳

She's bulimic. Poor girl. I would be looking to support her not sack her.

Agree with others about potential pregnancy. Or she was just unwell and didn't feel she could make it to the toilet so grabbed a bag. Maybe meant to hide it from you and forgot due to feeling unwell. May have wanted to dump elsewhere and not on your property.

But I don't see what a bag of vomit has to do with the other things you mention. Those are a separate issue.

I'm sure if you asked her she'd be mortified.

What bags were you going through?

This is a really weird thread.

Gross misconduct? For throwing up? You can't be serious.

The OP mentions a sleeve of cookies along with the vomit, this is fairly obviously bulimia. If she lives in, she is probably trying to avoid using communal bathrooms in case of sounds etc - hence the bag which she hasn't disposed of yet.

I would seek advice from an eating disorders charity on how best to approach it. Easy to get it wrong

Why are you looking through your nanny’s bags ?

That’s probably one of the first things you’ll get asked when she takes you to a tribunal for sacking her claiming gross misconduct.

What's a sleeve of cookies?

My guess would be bulimic, just because the bag thing was typical me behaviour many years ago

I think she’s clearly forgotten to take it/ throw it away.

I would ask her what’s wrong. But at a guess it’s an eating disorder or a huge hangover

Riiiiiiiiiight.