To ask you to tell me what you're tired of?

[Scratch22]

Just wanted to create a thread just for people to vent because I really feel I need to.

I love my child but I'm so tired of everything parenting brings. I'm tired of the endless grind of cleaning, nagging and tidying that is my life. I'm tired of having a poorly paid job I hate where I'm not valued just because it fits in with school. I'm tired of having to be sociable so that my child can be. I'm tired of having no money and absolutely nothing for myself because my child needs uniform, swimming lessons, days out etc none of which she appreciates. I'm tired of having a body with endless problems since having a child - the latest one being painful haemorrhoids. I'm tired of feeling old, fat and unattractive and invisible to men. I'm tired of feeling guilty about never really being good enough at anything and not being as happy as I should be. There - now I don't have to go outside and scream! Thank you.

I’m tired of constantly being tired I have fibromyalgia so I’m constantly tired and in constant pain. Feels like my body is just broken. I’m fed up of everything hurting.

I’m tired of Brexit and useless politicians

Tired of the way everyone is so dramatic about everything these days.
Tired of the way people under 30 speak in that weird lilting tone and everything is incredibly this or distressing or excruciating -stop over reacting
Tired of people on MN reading a post and being offended because eg the OP noted that the person who ran her over was an old man - just stop virtue signalling “look at me! I noticed something offensive! I’m morally superior! I pointed something out!”

I'm most tired of constantly striving and worrying about having the right balance. Did I play with DD enough? Have I had enough 1 on 1 time? Am I too distracted?

I'm a bit bored at the moment of playing with her and I feel absolutely awful saying that. It's only in the last few weeks I'm a bit meh!

Didn't go to a birthday party Sunday and just coasting along but my works really ramped up lately and I think I just don't have any extra to give..

Zero me time, zero anything at all for myself just constant fighting to stay on top of everything, manage the house, DD, animals and business.

But I'm pretty happy in general - go figure?!?!

I'm most tired of constantly striving and worrying about having the right balance. Did I play with DD enough? Have I had enough 1 on 1 time? Am I too distracted?

I'm a bit bored at the moment of playing with her and I feel absolutely awful saying that. It's only in the last few weeks I'm a bit meh!

Didn't go to a birthday party Sunday and just coasting along but my works really ramped up lately and I think I just don't have any extra to give..

Zero me time, zero anything at all for myself just constant fighting to stay on top of everything, manage the house, DD, animals and business.

But I'm pretty happy in general - go figure?!?!

I'm most tired of constantly striving and worrying about having the right balance. Did I play with DD enough? Have I had enough 1 on 1 time? Am I too distracted?

I'm a bit bored at the moment of playing with her and I feel absolutely awful saying that. It's only in the last few weeks I'm a bit meh!

Didn't go to a birthday party Sunday and just coasting along but my works really ramped up lately and I think I just don't have any extra to give..

Zero me time, zero anything at all for myself just constant fighting to stay on top of everything, manage the house, DD, animals and business.

But I'm pretty happy in general - go figure?!?!

@ChateauMyself that makes me so sad. I used to support children on the spectrum in primary schools and socialising is so important for them. Are there any after school or lunchtime clubs that your DS could go to to bond which could then lead to play dates? Or any clubs/hobbies out of school that he’d be interested in? I really hope things get better for him (and you).

I'm tired of feeling like we're getting somewhere then everything going to hell again and we're either back at square one, or worse off then we were. However I'm fully aware things could be sooooo much worse and I do keep reminding myself of that.

Also, I'm tired of feeling rubbish due to chronic migraine and the medication I take for that and epilepsy making me have a rubbish memory, and do things like.. forget something like an appointment or children's parents evening, even though I write everything down. I've stood friends up and everything and I never used to be like that, its really embarrassing.

Tired of working horrible minimum wage jobs, because every job I go for (similar to what i was doing pre DC) I get turned down due to being at home with kids for last 10 years and they always want someone with more 'recent experience.'
F**k you. I have raised 2 SN DD's largely by myself. I have never worked harder in my life, learnt waaay more than when I worked, dealt with difficult people, begged for funding etc. I had to take unpaid day off my shitty job, (costing half my food budget).
I hate recrutiers. Most unhelpful people ever.

I'm tired of being in temp accommodation, of having no proper home for my kids, I'm tired of the guilt. Mostly I'm just fucking tired as I'm sleeping on the floor on an air bed

I'm tired of being in temp accommodation, of having no proper home for my kids, I'm tired of the guilt. Mostly I'm just fucking tired as I'm sleeping on the floor on an air bed

I'm tired of people taking advantage of me and playing me for a fool. I'm tired of being used and I'm tired of my nan drilling her negative bull shit into me. I'm tired of always having to be the bigger person and putting up with exdps shit for dds sake, when all I want to do is tell him to fuck off and take his abuse elsewhere, then never see him again.

I'm tired of my ill health. I've had mobility issues since before my teens and now it's so bad that I'm frequently bedbound and almost always housebound. I'm tired of the pain, the horrible side effects of the many medications I have to take and of not being able to do the things I'd like to.

Tired of the terrible distractedness and inability to concentrate I've had since my mum died suddenly (over a year ago now) and tired of how shit it makes me at work and at achieving anything significant with my life beyond raising my child.

Tired of feeling like it's my job to balance my DP's needs against my DD's, when I feel like she shod be BOTH of our top priority, rather than his competitor for my attention, affection, self-sacrifice. Tired of resenting him for coming between her and me, and of him resenting her for coming between he and I.

Tired of trying to revive my sex drive when frankly I'd be happy to let it sleep for the next year or so. Tired of having sex I'm not really keen on because I feel bad that I'm not keen on it any more when I really used to be and it's reasonable for him to expect some affection and connection.

Tired of the hormonal upheaval of weaning that is making me depressed and periodically hysterical. Tired of missing breastfeeding and knowing that in all likelihood having weaned my DP still won't want a second child that I desperately want. Tired of knowing we probably chose wrong, tired of me not being happy, him not being happy, and both of us being too cowardly to admit to each other that we'd be better off apart.

Tired of being fat, but more tired of feeling I should do something about it when all I want is to coddle my anxiety away with food.

@growlingbear that's exactly what I came to write.
I have more than one friend doing a bloody amazing job of battling terminal cancer, losing spouses in their 40s, being unable to work and yet I'm making my own life miserable on purpose.
I work full time, have 2 beautiful kids, an amazing husband and yet I'm clinically depressed, have zero self esteem, 4 stone overweight and climbing and so on.
I am as of this week tackling it but I hate it. My house is a shit tip but I don't have the energy to clean it. I can't sleep at night but I'm exhausted during the day. I hate my looks but I binge, comfort eat. I shop compulsively to make myself feel better but then I get into debt.

Sorry. Ramble.
Basically im sick of the fact that my life could be so much more worthwhile and yet even though I know this I still struggle massively to change it.

I am tired of constantly feeling insecure and being alone

I know this comes from my childhood, I get it all I can work with others to help them move forward. I just can’t regardless of how much therapy I have had all it’s made me do is stop acting on my emotions I still feel them.

I would love nothing more than to believe a partner does love me but it’s always too late once I get it

I just can’t and I am so fed up being alone and putting up boundaries or being with men who I know will let me down - when you know they will it’s no great shock after all you knew it would happen at some point but it still deeply hurts

And fed up with weight and promising myself I will stop binging and start exercising

I'm tired of repeating myself. I'm tired of being tired. I'm tired of my anxiety and the fact that it makes me a control freak. I'm tired of grief plaguing my life. I'm tired of working full time. I'm tired of juggling money/budgets. I'm tired of worrying about my asd son. I'm tired of my skin looking like crap for the last 14 years. I'm tired of never ending to do lists.

DHs ex. Being so pathetic in everything she says and does. She's far from amicable.. Her latest is creating hell because we didn't tell her when our wedding was and gave her a fake date because we knew she'd create an issue . She then slipped up and said she wanted to know because she didn't want their dd to be part of it, as she's her mum not me and under no circumstances am I to be step mum or be called mummy... Wtf? For the record I've never said I want to be called her mummy nor would dh tell her to. She has a mummy. And I guess either way she is my dsd but that will never change her relationship with her dd. I'm still me, but now married to her daddy.. Fwiw dsd was absolutely made up about the wedding and said it was the best day in her ' wholest widest life' bless her.

We also get continuous messages like.. ' child came home and her skin is dry.. Or child came home and her nail has split and the best one.. You didn't return a hair grip.!

We supply Everything here and rightly so and she just wears home what she wears to us ( we never used to bother getting her changed but when clothes were either not returned or when dsd was younger and wet herself on the way home. She bagged the wet clothes up. Unwashed and gave back the next time. They'd gone mouldy!)
The said hair grip was one of those you get about 100 for 75p!

Hoping it will stop, it's been 5 years!

I am tired of dealing with the endless fallout from my son's alcoholism. And wish I could find the energy and resolve to kick the shitbag out of my house so that I and his sibling can enjoy some peace. I am tired of having no energy to do anything other than cope with said fallout.

Well, I did intend to say that I'm tired of having rheumatoid arthritis. But reading through everyone else's posts, I'm thinking that if RA is my 'lot' in life then I've got off lightly.

I am tired of life, the routine of it. Living for the weekend, it zooms past so quick. Winters coming around, next series of Strictly, soon be Xmas, then the holiday ads start appearing, just the sheer repetition.

My sinuses or whatever is affecting them.

People, their rudeness and self absorption. The banal conversations where nobody listens, just mentally lining up the next sentence before the other person has finished. Being more familiar with tops of people's heads due to their phone being their most important thing.

Lies. But not caring enough to challenge them.

Misogyny in all its forms. It's only now that I am middle aged that I see how it has affected my life and the choices I made.

I think this is going to be a long thread. So many of us are tired....

People trying to get from A to B by ricocheting off of me whilst staring at their bloody phone and weaving about the pavement rather than looking where the fuck they're going.

Double when I'm on my bike and they're hazardously dipping into and out of a clearly segregated and kerbed cycle lane whilst, I wouldn't be surprised, whining on and on and bloody on on social media about how dangerous it is for cyclists to be on pavements (which it is but, oh, the hypocrisy).

This is why it is now my weekend treat to close the curtains and not leave the house whenever possible.

I’m tired of my ex thinking he can just turn up once a week to play with a clean freshly ironed child, and make no other effort at all.
This weekend was our son’s birthday. I made the cake, sorted a play date picnic, bought presents, made birthday pancakes with raspberries.

Ex showed up at 9.30 without even a card and said “have you thought about presents?” Last year he brought a card with the wrong age on it. FFS! What does he do with his brain? Each time I think he can’t be even more useless, he surpasses himself.

And breathe....

I’m tired of my health problems.

Tired of covering up my skin so nobody can see my psoriasis and judge me, tired of looking at how thin my hair is because I have PCOS but equally tired at constantly removing hair from new places on my body where it’s suddenly sprouted, tired of being fat and feeling frumpy, tired of having no regularity in respect of my bowel movements because I have IBS, tired of worrying about every little thing I can think of at 4am in the morning because I have anxiety...just TIRED.