Petty things you still can't forgive people for

[Milkbath]

I have two

First one is my SIL (husband's sister)
She means well, but we're very different people, and she can be brash and overbearing. We're constantly working on maintaining boundaries for her, as otherwise she'd stamp all over them.

When I had my baby, she arrived unannounced a few days after we came home. This coincided with the community midwife visiting, and instead of making her excuses and leaving, SIL sat there and listened as the midwife asked me all the usual questions, some of which were extremely personal. Meanwhile SIL's toddler DC was trashing the house. In hindsight I wish I'd said something, but I was so weak and exhausted. The midwife should have as well, she kept glancing over at sil with that sort of expectant "time to fuck off now" look but sil has the hide of a rhino. Midwife was younger than I was at the time and I think she was a bit intimidated too. Even sometimes now I think back to it and it infuriates me!

When I had not long given birth to my son, my friend popped round to see him. I showed her the first picture of my DP, DS and me together minutes after he was born, no make up on or anything but really happy. Do you know what she said?!
‘Oh god, I could never take a picture of me looking like that!’
I was shocked and said something along the lines of, ‘Well I had just had a baby and am immensely proud of what I had just done.’
She then tried to backtrack and said she didn’t mean it like that etc but I’ve not forgotten and I’m still annoyed nearly 3 years on.
That photo is one of my favourites and is proudly hanging on my front room wall. She can do one, I love it.

A friend for not sponsoring me when I was losing weight to raise money for a cancer charity. Said she "doesnt do that kind of thing".

My mum's hairdresser for giving me the finger when she cut me up driving about 15 years ago. Always sweetness and light and then did this. Pretty shocking

Me and another lady started at the same time in a shop. I left and didn't get a card or anything. Came in a while later was asked are u working today? I said no I left a while ago she said oh I hadn't noticed. The other lady who started with me left a few months later and got flowers card and chocolates. I also never got a card when I had my baby. Had been there 3 and a half years in total. Guess that shows what people think of me

I will never forgive my PILs for staying in my house for two weeks when my dm's cancer had just returned and not asking about her. She died two weeks after they left and my MIL didn't once either personally give her condolences or ask me how I was feeling. Instead two days before dm's funeral, she called dh and asked to speak to me. She then proceeded to tell me all about the struggles they were having with finding a career for her dm. She never once mentioned my dm or the upcoming funeral. It's as if my dm didn't exist and my PILs had met her many times.

Was doing a summer student exchange thing in France. Cousin of girl I was doing the exchange with ate the last chocolate biscuit which should have been mine as she'd already had 2 and I'd only had 1. Still fuming about it.....30 years later

Not really a situation of not forgiving but not forgetting. My friends and I had a mutual friend who lived in the UK and then moved back to her home country. She was diagnosed with stage IV cancer and it spread. She contacted me and my friend to let us know that she was coming back and gave us a time she could see us. I knew how important this was - she was coming to say goodbye. My friend did not come because of her child’s after school activity. The friend from overseas died a few months later and we never saw her again. I have not forgotten my friends view on priorities

I dislike a family member of dh as they just turned up 2 days ( unannounced) after I gave birth to ds wouldn't leave when I needed to breastfeed ds and made comments such as I never cleaned our house when our dc was born . I see them at family events and I smile politely but never got over it .

Midwife having an appalling attitude with me when I arrived at the hospital 10cm dilated with my first baby, in excruciating pain and scared out of my wits aged 19.

"What do you mean you can't do it by yourself, screaming won't help"

Not so petty to be honest but it's never left me. Bitch.

When I was about 7 or 8, my parents threw a big party for me. At this party, we played the classic game of pass the parcel. I had the parcel firmly in both hands and had just started the movement to pass it on to the girl on my left (my so-called best friend) when the music stopped. My BF quickly snatched the parcel out of my hand and started opening it. I protested - it was the last bit, so had the main prize inside, it was clearly my turn as it had been in both my hands when the music stopped, and she had already had a go and got a prize. My parents insisted that the right thing to do was let her have it, despite it clearly having been intended for me. I was the only child to not get a single prize the whole afternoon, at my own party.
Over 30 years later, the bitterness is still strong within me.

My son took the class teddy home with him. It was loose, with a book. Over the weekend we made a bag for it using some denim and a thick piece of Perspex as a window. Teacher gave it back. Doesn’t want it. (All the other class pets had a bag)

Same teacher, my eldest is attending appointments in London for his liver. Because of this i book ad-hoc after school sessions for those appointments for my younger sons, because we always end up home at 5pm.
This teacher wouldn’t believe my son was going to after school club that day, sent him to the office. I had a phone call at 4:00 asking if I was going to pick him up soon. I did ask why he couldn’t just go to this session I paid for, and they started flapping saying “oh there’s been a mistake”.

After giving birth to my youngest I had no support network. I was a carer to my dad and had to do Monday morning business as usual. I was reported for looking pale and weak to the child protection officer. 3 days before I had a c-section and lost a litre and a bit of blood. Of course I was going to look pale.

My nan used to sit with babe when baby was asleep and I used to take an old buggy to carry school bags in (because my boys couldn’t carry anything . I got reported for pushing the baby around in a filthy old pram!

At 2 weeks baby had projectile vomiting after feeding. The only way to keep milk down and to avoid screaming with pain was to put the buggy in a semi sitting/laying position. (Not sitting up completely, but at a slanted angle). Got reported as baby not lying flat. Unsuitable buggy. (After 2 visits to the doctor we got gaviscon)

Also got reported for dressing baby (she’s a girl) in boys clothes. It was hot July and she was wearing an age 3-4 T-shirt of her brothers to keep her cool. Also when her brothers bought clothes for her as a newborn, they went for pokemon (age 2-3 ) and dinosaurs and cars. I didn’t think there was any harm in it, but apparently I should dress her more like a girl. I did ask if it’s the same person reporting me but they wouldn’t say. I was very paranoid!

Instead of supporting me post a pretty awful birth, unwell baby that needed life saving surgery at a couple of weeks old my parents overstepped every boundary possible and completely steamrollered our first few months as parents. Everything was all about them.

Then told my whole family I had pnd and that's why I was so difficult. I didn't have pnd, as soon as they fucked off life was great again and I felt fine. All about keeping up appearances and they couldn't possibly let anyone know that it was down to their twattery why I was keeping them at arms length.

I still struggle to this day and our relationship isn't the same. When they go on one about someone or something I inwardly seethe and want to call them wankers.

I was 17 and my friend told me that mutual friend's boyfriend had described me as 'rank'. I'm 45 now and I still think about it sometimes and how it made me feel. I don't know why she passed that little gem onto me.

The midwife after I gave birth to first DS. I had nearly died and she allowed my DH to stay for only 10mins (was after 9pm) and she kept shushing him even although he wasn't even being loud because the woman in the next bed had 'just got out of surgery'. Like I had just came from a lovely spa day or something. Fucking bitch she was.

I am such a grudge bearer, renowned for it! I have too many of my own to mention but am fuming at so many of the ones on here - can't believe the slag comment?!! Wtf was she thinking?

Ex boss. I'd requested at least 3 times for adequate equipment to do my job. 4th time I emailed request. Chased it up;

"Yah I did get your email but I ignored it"

Hence ex boss. I'm getting riled thinking about it.

Never had the best relationship with older DSis. When DD1 was born 18 years ago, she dropped by to see her newborn niece. She held her like a rag doll taking no care to support her head. The lack of care I've never forgotten or forgiven and is something that sadly typifies our relationship. I remember sitting there watching and hating every second before making an excuse to get her back.

Midwife who gave my baby DS2 formula feed when he was in SCBU because I was 2 mins late for scheduled breast feed ...I'd had a Caesarian ffs. Cow!

Being sent to detention for loudly refusing to agree that there is an "n" in cemetery. I was 10, so it's over 30 years ago.

When I was pregnant and we found out that DD1 was going to be a girl, we told MIL she was having a granddaughter and also told her the name we’d picked.

Without missing a beat she turned to look at DH and said “oh I don’t like that name”. I wanted to smack her. Never forgotten it. Never will.

It’s a perfectly ordinary, normal name as well. Nothing ‘yoonique’.

I was the proud owner of a girls world. I loved doing her hair and putting make up on her. (Never do either as a grown up!)

My sister wound her hair right out to it's fullest then chopped it off. She also gave her a permanent pen moustache and beard.

I need say no more!

BIL attending tea party for dd’s first birthday and sat the whole time watching a match on his mobile and DH saying nothing

A good friend got married a very long time ago.
I took planes, trains and automobiles to get to her wedding. And time off work. And bought a fabulous present from Harrod's, too.

Many years later and she's living the high life with plenty of money etc. Turns up to my wedding, buys the cheapest item on the list, stays for Sunday drinks and then blazes out of town in her DH's fancy car never to be seen or heard from again.

I have never forgiven her for that. I thought she was a friend. I was wrong.

Grrrr.

My husband’s Aunt who called me a coward for not wanting to be in a picture than refused afterwards to be in one as well a moment later. It was the first time I ever met her and I could only think what kind of person calls a family member they are meeting for the first time a coward. I was too shocked to retort back and even though it was three years ago every time my husband suggest stopping there for a visit on our way up North I find a legitimate reason to not do it.

@NameChangerOfTheNorth

A ‘friend’ of mine when we were 7 or 8, she was jealous of my amazing pencil and stole it, I managed to get it back but she stole it again and sharpened it all the way down on both ends and presented me with it in front of the whole class and made me cry.

She’d left just a little bit of pattern in the middle so I could be sure it was my lovely pencil. The bitch!

I see her in passing now, over 30 years later and we say hi but I hate her for that

An ex manager, who set herself up as the enfant terrible of the section, by loudly coming out with rude or unpleasant comments, under the guise of “humour”. Took a dislike to me, possibly because she was old Labour and considered me posh, or because I didn't join in with the “banter”..
I managed a large team, in which a friend of mine was on temporary contract, along with a few others. She always referred to her as “your friend” and when all the others got their contracts made permanent, after 2 years, deliberately left her out of the arrangements and let her contract lapse. It wasn’t because she was bad at the job; all the other managers and staff thought she was excellent - and kept on asking, “where's X ?” It was simply because she was my friend.
What a fucking bitch. I hope karma catches up with her.