To take DS3 with me to work? AIBU?

[ShortbreadPGTips]

I’m a single mum to three children, ex moved out in March. He lives nearby and the dcs stay there every weekend. When the kids start school again in September, I’ve been thinking of starting a cleaning business. I’ve been a SAHM since my eldest was born 6 years ago.

I have two older children who are in full time school, and DS3 is still in nursery. He only goes to nursery 1-4pm every day. I tried to start the business a few months ago and put an ad up, but people were requesting a cleaner Tuesday 10-12pm for example, and I couldn’t do it because of my son. But now I’m considering starting the business again, and just take DS with me. I could do cleaning when DS is in nursery, but I also need to be back to pick up DS6 and DD5 from school at 3.30pm, so it will be very hard. If I took DS3 with me to work, I could get more done and work from 9am til 3pm. I thought of bringing some colouring books and crayons with me and just let DS get on with it while I clean. AIBU to do this?

But you wouldn't leave something like that where it could be broken I bet

I have it on display because I like to use it everyday. It sits on my desk which is by the window in the living room. When my mother was alive it sat on her desk, which was in the same place as mine in her house. The children in my family all know about it and grew up knowing the story so treat it with immense respect and care. Other children coming to my house are told not to touch things and are supervised closely by me or their parents. A cleaner bringing a child into my house is not the same thing. Why should I not have my own possessions out on show just to placate someone who should sort out their own childcare? It's nit professional,

It would be a no from me as well.

We hire a professional cleaning service at work... one of the cleaners once turned up with her child due to childcare issues. She ended up distracted as he needed attention and I ended up having to source entertainment for him (paper and highlighters!). Not the end of the world as a one off, but I would have put a stop to it if it became a regular thing.

I realised that my reply was ambiguous. I meant that it was a no to bringing your child.

The issue is that you need to be in the house for several hours and you simply cannot supervise them for that time. It's totally different to your child occupying themselves in your home compared to a clients.

My cleaner brings her kids with her sometimes and I absolutely don't mind.

The caveat being that she was cleaning for months before she asked if she could, and they genuinely don't get in the way at all. They sit on their iPads or play in the garden. We have DC so our house is fairly kid friendly and her kids are v sensible.

I'd rather have her with DC than not have her cleaning.

Perhaps start without him and then ask at a later point when you know them better.

I had a nanny who brought her own child. It worked well, but then it was her actual job to look after the children. She was also paid less than the going rate because she was providing her own childcare.

It’s a nope from me. As other people have said my house isn’t kiddie proofed for a 3 year old.

I absolutely would welcome family and friends with toddlers but that’s because we would be sat watching and engaging with the toddler not busy working and cleaning.

I think it's absolutely fine as long as you run it by the client. We have a cleaner and she brings two of her kids with her most weeks during the holidays. They play in my backyard or they bring their iPads or Watch TV is not a problem at all

I'm sorry I wouldn't employ a cleaner who brought their kid with them.

Could you maybe get together with another mum in a similar position and run the business together, taking turns with who does the cleaning and who looks after both kids, splitting the takings equally?

I do think YABU, but to offer another solution, why don’t you just advertise with your working hours as Monday - Friday 1-3pm and Saturday 9am-1pm?
If I saw a cleaning ad that said - ‘Afternoon cleaning slots available on weekdays at competitive rates!’ I would happily go for that. I have been considering getting a cleaner and wouldn’t be bothered about a particular time slot if you did a good job. I would be very bothered if you brought your child though- I have breakables and precious things all over the place as it’s only adults in my house.

Another thing is you could advertise as a rug/ sofa / carpet service and make it clear on your ad - stuff like 2PM SLOTS AVAILABLE

Or you could do end of tenancy cleans- more cynical but they tend to be one off clients with empty houses so as long as you get the job done well they might not be as bothered about a child being there.

YABU
I wouldn’t want a child playing with my kids toys. My kids would be devastated if something was broken. If you child picks up a bug from nursery and then spreads germs onto my kid’s toys, couch we sit on

@justmakeitbetter Thank you for being so understanding, but there’s a few things I haven’t thought about until I came on here. The client could be home, and I don’t want them to feel like they have to entertain my son, and I’m insured, but I didn’t realise that if my son breaks something it will probably affect the insurance? I honestly thought most houses would be empty, the clients would be at work and I could just clean. Currently I get 15 hours free childcare for DS, so I will speak to the nursery in September and ask if I can get 3 full days,instead of having the hours spread over the week. That way I can work properly in those 3 days, and in the weekends. My plan is to slowly build the business up this year, and also do some ironing on the side, and do it full time next year when DS3 starts school September 2020. Hopefully I’ll be able to hire staff. It’s incredibly hard to be a single mum, but I feel blessed that my ex lives so close and he takes the dcs every weekend. Right now I’m sitting in my house, alone.. and can hear myself think, after a week of fighting, tantrums and constant “mummy..” Bliss . I know there are mums on MN who are alone with their children, no help from their ex or family. So I feel blessed that I have the weekend off.

@TheInvestigator
Your post made me a bit emotional, this is exactly what I want. Build a successful business so I can give my children a good life. This is all for them. You must be so proud of yourself, and how far you’ve come. Your children must be proud of you aswell. Congratulations. I wish you all the best.

@TheNanny23

why don’t you just advertise with your working hours as Monday - Friday 1-3pm and Saturday 9am-1pm?
If I saw a cleaning ad that said - ‘Afternoon cleaning slots available on weekdays at competitive rates!’ I would happily go for that.

This is a great idea, I haven't thought of it like that. I have 15 hours free childcare every week, and the weekends off. So I need to make this work somehow.

Just want to say thank you to everyone who has responded to my thread and came with suggestions, hopefully in 6 months from now I will come back with an update once I have my business up and running

An alternative view point here. I am a gardener and bring my 7 month old to work 3/5 days. I charge by the hour. I make a point of looking at the time when I have to stop for baby and look again when I go back to work. This has been the case since he was 2 months old so he is very used to being able to see me though not the centre of my attention. Most of the time it works well. Sometimes it take me 3 hours to do an hours work (obviously only charge for the hour working).
I’ve taken my stepson to work as well from when he was 2. I brought toys for him and his own tools so he could copy me. Perhaps one of those child Henry hoovers would be a great investment for you? And a duster so you can get him to “help” wipe cupboard doors etc.
The main difference between us I think is that I already had a customer base before bringing the children so they knew I’m a hard worker and trust me to keep an eye on the time I’m playing/feeding etc.
I get nowt done the days I have to try taking them both aged 7 months and 6 years!

Off the point but I once had to take DS with me to an FE college evening class I was teaching (I think DH’s commuter train was seriously delayed). This was in the days of chalk boards so I collected a load of coloured chalks from reception for him to use. The class always took a bit of time to settle down and I was shocked to hear young DS from behind me say loudly “stop talking, my Mummy’s speaking!”. It worked!

We have a cleaner and I wouldn't be happy for them to bring their child.