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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To take DS3 with me to work? AIBU?

166 replies

ShortbreadPGTips · 26/07/2019 08:48

I’m a single mum to three children, ex moved out in March. He lives nearby and the dcs stay there every weekend. When the kids start school again in September, I’ve been thinking of starting a cleaning business. I’ve been a SAHM since my eldest was born 6 years ago.

I have two older children who are in full time school, and DS3 is still in nursery. He only goes to nursery 1-4pm every day. I tried to start the business a few months ago and put an ad up, but people were requesting a cleaner Tuesday 10-12pm for example, and I couldn’t do it because of my son. But now I’m considering starting the business again, and just take DS with me. I could do cleaning when DS is in nursery, but I also need to be back to pick up DS6 and DD5 from school at 3.30pm, so it will be very hard. If I took DS3 with me to work, I could get more done and work from 9am til 3pm. I thought of bringing some colouring books and crayons with me and just let DS get on with it while I clean. AIBU to do this?

OP posts:
saraclara · 26/07/2019 10:49

Nope. Completely unprofessional, and no life for the child.

Start your business slowly, and advertise yourself as some who has "afternoon spaces available at the moment" . People will just assume that your morning slots are booked, and the people who contact you will already have accepted that you can only do afternoons.

KarmaStar · 26/07/2019 10:53

Hi op,
No ywbu to do this.
Perhaps take in ironing instead?to do at home.

TheInvestigator · 26/07/2019 10:54

I wouldn't child proof my home just for my cleaner. I have lots of small things and breakables around. My own kids are old enough now but it would not be safe for a toddler. And let's face it, the toddler would need to be unsupervised. If you wete supervising him, then you wouldn't be working properly for the time I would be paying you. If you turned up with a kid, I would turn you away and wouldn't pay.

Trebla · 26/07/2019 10:55

Best cleaner I ever had bought her daughter with her.

GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 26/07/2019 10:57

I'm assuming you need insurance; this would not cover your child; any accidental damage they did to a client's property, or indeed any damage to them if they had an accident/fell down the stairs/cut themselves etc.
Health and Safety nightmare.

You will not be able to focus fully on cleaning while your DS is there. So not fair on clients.

And you can't focus fully on your DS while working; so not fair on your DS.

Sorry but I think it's a terrible idea. Arrange childcare.

Yeahnahmum · 26/07/2019 10:59

No way. I pay for a cleaner. Not For them to Take their toddler with them! They are going to be taking up your time (time that you get paid for to do cleaning not childwatching). And might break something etc etc.

Just no. Get childcare sorted op.

sunglasses123 · 26/07/2019 11:01

Definitely not! I came home many years ago to find my cleaner and her two children in the house. One was upstairs! She said she thought I wouldn't mind....

There is also an sense of entitlement on this thread that sometimes they just HAVE to do it and we just need to suck it up

probstimeforanewname · 26/07/2019 11:01

I wouldn't be too happy if my cleaners started bringing their child along

Me neither. Maybe as a one-off in an emergency eg if a childminder were ill, after all I want my house cleaned but otherwise not.

Next thing, people will be expecting to take their dog to work with them. Oh wait...

lawnmowingsucks · 26/07/2019 11:06

You're working and however independent your child is, your child will need you to keep an eye on him. So you won't be working 100%. Also - does your insurance cover you AND your child?

IsobelRae23 · 26/07/2019 11:11

Sorry but I would not be happy. My home is no longer child proof. Whilst you are upstairs hoovering etc, you can’t hear your child. Remember some house will be a lot bigger, 5 bedrooms, could be over 3 floors and so on. The time you would take moving a toddler around would eat into it. Plus for those working from home, they would constantly be watching him to make sure he didn’t do something like crayon on the sofa- the should be working, not child minding. So a big no from me!

missbattenburg · 26/07/2019 11:15

To those who already have a cleaner, when do you have your cleaning done? Mornings, afternoons or in the weekends?

When I had a cleaner I was not fussed about when they cleaned - so long as it was

a) during normal office hours as I was most likely to be at work
b) the same time (ish) each week and I knew when it was, in case I was home sick etc.

I was more fussed about the day - I wanted a Thursday so it was ready for the weekend but so my fridays were free as I was then most likely to be off or wfh etc.

I would have been put off/out by a cleaner bringing their child with them, I'm afraid.

Turefu · 26/07/2019 11:18

I’ve been running my cleaning business for years and my son is 7 now. Very occasionally I took him with me to work, when childminder could have him for some reasons. It takes longer to clean with child around. I only did it to customers I’ve been with for long time and asked them first. On one occasion I took my son to clean holiday cottage , because I had to look after him too, it took my longer to clean and when new guests arrived at arranged time, I wasn’t ready. I finished half an hour later. They were fine with it, but it’s not ideal. It’s just doesn’t work.

chuttypicks · 26/07/2019 11:19

I can't imagine many people having their houses cleaned on a weekend tbh, as they are more likely to be at home on a weekend than a weekday. Maybe you could get some weekend cleaning work at offices or something though?

TheRedBarrows · 26/07/2019 11:20

Totally unrealistic.

One spilt drink on sofa, one incident of accidental damage, one wet pants accident in the sofa, one sticky handprint on the wallpaper.

Some good ideas here though. The Teachers service could work.

Gillian1980 · 26/07/2019 11:21

Yabu sorry.

As an emergency on the odd occasion I wouldn’t mind but not every visit. I’d be concerned about damage being caused or child getting hurt (insurance an issue as pp have mentioned).

Settlersofcatan · 26/07/2019 11:28

We have a nice play area set up for our son who is around the same age but I wouldn't want an unsupervised (because you would clearly not always be in the same room) child using it every week. Inevitably because he is 3, he would damage something eventually and my son would be really upset if that was his favourite toy and also I have it all organised in a way that works for my son and it's unlikely that your son would put it all back the way we like it. That might sound precious but I hire a cleaner to leave my house nice and this would add additional disorganisation.

Separately - am surprised by all of the references to insurance. I am sure the big agencies have insurance but I didn't think individual cleaners did - certainly none of the ones we have had have ever mentioned it.

ASundayWellSpent · 26/07/2019 11:28

Sorry no I wouldn't be happy about that. Maybe as a one off in case of child being poorly etc but not as a usual arrangement. As regards to hours, mid week 9.30-11.30

Jaxhog · 26/07/2019 11:38

I wouldn't be happy if my cleaner brought their toddler along, except (maybe) in an emergency. Have you thought about insurance? Taking a child might make a difference.

VanGoghsDog · 26/07/2019 12:08

YABU.

My previous cleaner kept asking to bring her children - if they are not old enough to look after themselves then how can you clean while they are there?

Also - insurance etc?

But anyway, no, if you are working then you are working. Looking after a child is also working, so you can't do both at once.

sunglasses123 · 26/07/2019 12:48

Needless to say I don't have a cleaner anymore. I was living in an area and a number of years ago where cleaners interviewed you. I then decided all their issues - (childcare wasn't the only one) wasn't worth it.

I still think there is a sense of entitlement that some cleaners just MUST bring their kids to work.

I didn't think of the insurance side tbh. Say the toddler broke and damaged something. The cleaner would either deny it was their child or not be able to pay for the damage. Then what.....

MichelleC69 · 26/07/2019 12:53

Sorry but I wouldn't be happy if my cleaner starting bringing their young child along with them - how can you work effectively if you're distracted by a 3 year old? I couldn't take my child into the office with me - same difference in my opinion.

BarbedBloom · 26/07/2019 12:54

If it was a total one off then fair enough, but my house is not child proof and I wouldn't accept a cleaner bringing her child regularly. I also have pets and wouldn't want them left with an unsupervised child for the protection of both.

Morning or afternoon is fine by me but not weekends as me and DH are here then and want to relax if we're in

Mishappening · 26/07/2019 13:00

I had a cleaner who used to bring 3 children! - in the school hols. But it was great as she looked after my 3 in the hols too at the same time. It suited both of us and did not seem to interfere with the job.

Howdidido · 26/07/2019 14:23

Sorry no.
My cleaner is wonderful. She's brought one of her kids only once because chikdcare had fallen through that day- and was really clear that if I wasn't happy then she would rearrange our clean.
As it happens it was on a day off so my DD and her DS did play dough together.

I don't think the presence of a playroom or other kids makes a difference ! If my DD hadn't been there then it would have been very strange for her to suggest her DS use my playroom. It's my kid's space and toys. I don't want an unknown kid playing there alone.

So I think on occasion - with clients you've built up a relationship with then you can ask in an emergency. When they are new clients, who don't know you or your kids then you won't get many clients.
I would move nursery times to mornings I'd that's when everyone seems to want a clean

(I'm not fussed what time my cleaner comes)

Howdidido · 26/07/2019 14:24

It's the same as at my work- my 3 year old DD is independent and will sit and draw or "read" for ages. But there's no way I could do a full days work with her with me!

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