Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Targeted by neighbours again?

118 replies

Ladyofletters · 25/07/2019 19:30

I’m not sure if any MN’ers remember my thread nearly two years ago now, but I’m having a bit of deja vu and really just wanted somewhere to write it all out as I feel like I’m going mad!

I had the last thread deleted on advice of the Police but even though they are sympathetic this time they can’t really do anything for me at the moment.

I’m not really sure how to explain my last thread as it was honestly a bit crazy! Towards the end it didn’t even feel like real life!

So basically my DH and myself were being targeted by the ‘locals’, we’re still not 100% sure why but think it was because we were selling our house but wouldn’t lower the price for a local child moving back to the area (they were offering £50k less than asking price and we’d already accepted an offer over asking anyway)

So we sold up and moved (I don’t want to be too outing but we moved within the area but at least two villages over)
Nobody knew about the issues other than our friend and her DH (who came over a few times) my DM, my DH parents and another friend and her DP. We were unknown in the new village but have obviously made friends etc now but we haven’t told anyone what happened.

So to now, we have been getting strange phone calls. Just general breathing down the line then hanging up. We have also had random things being ordered and delivered to our new house and we think we have been followed occasionally, normally days when we’ve been coming back in the evening.

It’s starting to scare me a little bit again, it’s like it’s all starting again and I’m feeling really shit!

DH says it’s probably just a coincidence but I can tell he’s a bit worried too. He won’t let me take the dog out alone anymore.

I don’t have anyone to talk to about this as DH thinks we shouldn’t say anything to anyone just in case.

Sorry this has been so long! Blush I don’t know what I want from this thread really, I’m thinking just writing it all out might make it play on my mind less. Sad

OP posts:
Mia184 · 26/07/2019 09:11

Did you arrange to have your mail forwarded to your new address when you moved? They would then know your new address at the old post office.

LakieLady · 26/07/2019 09:34

Did you arrange to have your mail forwarded to your new address when you moved? They would then know your new address at the old post office.

My ex-BIL was a postman, and he would happily give out people's new address when they had post forwarded. Shock

Pricedrop · 26/07/2019 09:40

Christ @Hoggytat, that's a scary thought. But actually, probably the most logical/likely?

Moonflower12 · 26/07/2019 10:13

My first thought was the post office too.
We live rurally and our post woman 'redirects' our post for us- as she used to deliver to our old address and does to our new one in the next village. This is obviously very helpful to us and we're grateful.

Could your post person live in your previous village as they are often local?

Two years is not long to continue a feud! We are Welsh. There were feuds that went on for generations. The present generation didn't even know what the original disagreement was about!

rainbowstardrops · 26/07/2019 10:22

Ooh that all sounds a bit odd. I'm not sure if I remember your previous thread or not. Could you link to it please?

DragonglassHeart · 26/07/2019 10:37

I remember your last thread OP.

Even then it put me in mind of a novel I read in the late eighties/early nineties where it turned out to be the DH. He wanted his wife to become a prisoner in her own home.

I didn't mention it then as it seemed too far fetched but now someone else has mentioned it..

Whatever it is I hope you get to the bottom of it very soon.

DGRossetti · 26/07/2019 10:50

Even then it put me in mind of a novel I read in the late eighties/early nineties where it turned out to be the DH. He wanted his wife to become a prisoner in her own home.

Alexei Sayle wrote a short story about a career man whose wife hated the rat race. He had a touch of OCD, and started finding the name "Patrick" being written around the outside of the house - usually in chalk. He started obsessing and all the CCTV and traps failed to uncover the perpetrator. Eventually it drove him to decide to move to the country and quite the rat race.

The last line of the story was after a few months in their new home, the wife took a chalk and scrawled "Patrick" on a stone wall of the new house ...

snitzelvoncrumb · 26/07/2019 10:50

.

EmeraldShamrock · 26/07/2019 11:17

I find the GDPR tedious in work at times, after this thread I am glad workers are learning to protect customers details. Would the a post master give out an address these days.

alfagirl73 · 26/07/2019 11:51

As someone who has been the victim of stalking, first of all, you have my sympathies! I know only too well how seemingly innocent/coincidental events can build up to quite a sinister picture. When I describe my stalking experience to people and list individual events, it sounds really quite silly at times... I can see people's faces thinking "is that all?!" - but unless you are in the situation and experience the culmination of events... (mine ultimately had a massive threat/event at the end which changed things and meant that the police could act), you really don't understand what it feels like. It's exhausting and draining... and can be quite terrifying.

I can only reiterate what others have said - take every precaution possible - CCTV, dash cams, doorbell with camera etc... and definitely keep a diary. Note small details... car registration plates, descriptions, information... become your own investigator - at best it will put your mind at rest... or it could ultimately help to paint a picture to the police if events become such that they can act. Trust your instincts - I learned that the hard way!

Sending supportive hugs! x

colourlessgreenidea · 26/07/2019 15:21

It was my card and account used apparently but it never actually showed on my card/account and I didn’t order them

Surely it’s impossible that your card and account were used but it hasn’t shown up either on your banking transactions or your Amazon account? Confused

caughtinanet · 26/07/2019 15:34

Do you need your landline for any incoming calls? I'd unplug the phone and only plug in when you need to.

Front and rear dashcam and home cctv as already suggested are good ideas.

Were the pizza deliveries paid for in advance or were you asked to pay for them?

daintytoes · 26/07/2019 16:37

could the last set of incidences at your old property have left you with a paranoid mental health condition? (I'm sorry to suggest this, it's just a question, I have no idea about such things).

suzie what now? Bit of a leap there.

daintytoes · 26/07/2019 16:38

Bold fail above.

Quote from pp...

"could the last set of incidences at your old property have left you with a paranoid mental health condition? (I'm sorry to suggest this, it's just a question, I have no idea about such things)."

EileenAlanna · 26/07/2019 16:45

Perhaps it would help if you drew up a few lists. Leave no-one off the lists, you & DH included. Look for where & how the information could have been acquired/passed on with everyone on the lists.
Who have you given your new, ex-directory number to?
Who knows/have you informed of your new address?
Who has been in a position to see/take documents that have both your bank card details?
Anyone having all those pieces of info didn't just come across each of them randomly, at least I would be incredulous that they had. It undoubtedly would feel uncomfortable examining friend/relatives in this light but I'd feel it's something that would have to be done.

TheSquiffyQuiff · 26/07/2019 16:47

Is this the thread where OP was getting followed when she was walking the dog and the guy hung around beside a tree and wouldn’t talk to her? Think small things were left...beads or silver foil balls or something....🤔

W0rriedMum · 26/07/2019 16:53

Yes @thesquiffyquiff. Christmas decorations or baubles if I remember correctly.

Oldbat66 · 26/07/2019 20:19

Easy enough to trace new address. Rightmove etc show date of sale of old house, then just search likely areas for same dates of sale - most people complete sale and purchase on same day.

Josephinebettany · 26/07/2019 22:10

When reading your posts it just screamed out at me that your husband is behind it. I don't want to scare you but feel you need to consider it

ScruffGin · 26/07/2019 22:18

I remember your old post and I'm sorry this is happening again.

I'd try to find out more from the pizza place/Amazon etc. Change your number or get a service where you have to say your name before getting through (think you can buy machines that do this).
CCTV and dash cam for the car as well

I hope this gets sorted for you

SavingSpaces2019 · 27/07/2019 00:29

DH says it’s probably just a coincidence but I can tell he’s a bit worried too. He won’t let me take the dog out alone anymore
Don't EVER ignore your gut instincts OP - people have died because they ignored the warning signs and delegated it all to 'coincidence'.

You may be ex directory but it's still very easy to find people - and their personal details - using public records and social media.

If they have friends who work in the NHS/public sector that you would need to register with...if they know where you work they can follow you from there.
I've worked in call centres for various utility companies, credit card services, internet providers, car insurance - and i know just how easy it is to find out personal details that are meant to be confidential.
I used to have a contract mobile and i was constantly harassed with prank calls, it didn't matter which provider i went to.
Since i started using a Pay&Go sim i have had zero prank calls.
I was being stalked and harassed and i knew who was behind it - there was just no way of proving it was them.

Report it all to the police and step up your home and personal security.
Also check your credit report as that will show up all the accounts and searches done on your name.
That will at least give you some evidence that it's no coincidence.

SavingSpaces2019 · 27/07/2019 00:33

you probably also had mail delivered to your old address after you moved out and they could have accessed that.

Boneshere · 27/07/2019 04:16

Get a multi agency in depth credit check to see if anything has been applied for or searched in your names.

Honestly though, I'm getting husband vibes too. The Amazon and magazine deliveries are worrying.

Have you checked your hidden orders on Amazon?

oatmilk4breakfast · 27/07/2019 04:32

Is your husband st home when you get the calls? Just interesting that all the consequences here are for you - not allowed out to walk dog alone, he’s told you not to say anything to anyone...

DaisyChainsGetBroken · 27/07/2019 04:50

Cable ties are one of the most sinister things to be delivered

How did you contact amazon? Like did you use your account to do it? If so why didn't you then see the transaction. Or was there a number/slip with the delivery.