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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

..to wear the same outfit twice?

123 replies

DorisDances · 25/07/2019 18:34

DC are getting married 2 years apart - I have a lovely hat, dress and shoes combo. Can i wear to both as they are do you think or is it courtesy to change some aspect or replace all?

OP posts:
Aroundtheworldin80moves · 25/07/2019 19:08

My DM and Aunt got married a couple of years apart. There's a photo of each with my grandparents. Grandfather in same suit. Grandmother in same outfit. Brides in same dress.

How things have changed in the past 35 years... That was normal in those days.

DameSylvieKrin · 25/07/2019 19:12

Could you have the dress dyed and add some new trim to the hat?

StCharlotte · 25/07/2019 19:16

Are you Princess Anne?!

My aunt wore a bonkers hat to my brother's wedding in 1977. It made something of an impression on me so I was highly amused when she wore it to mine. In 1999.

See what the DC think. Are they the same sex?

PixieLumos · 25/07/2019 19:24

If it was any old wedding I would say go for it, but for DC I would wear something different - your going to be in all their pictures wearing exactly the same.

TeapotofTerror · 25/07/2019 19:38

I don't see why not, I have no idea what my mother wore to my wedding. I'd have to hunt for the album and have a look and then email my sister to see if she can see what DM wore at her wedding and if it was the same.

user1519475227 · 25/07/2019 19:40

My mum wore the same outfit to my sister and mine graduation. People.alway comment on why is she wearing the same thing for 2 different significant events in her children's lifes. It kind of spoils it a bit and having both pictures next to each other just looks weird

Lazypuppy · 25/07/2019 19:40

@TeapotofTerror yes but chances are OP will end up with a photo from each wedding sat in the same room if not next to eachother and it'll be weird if she is in the same outfit?

DeadBod · 25/07/2019 19:40

No.

Original poster
DorisDances · 25/07/2019 19:47

Thanks all for your comments- mixed response illustrates why a bit of a dilemma! I loved the dress so think will look to see if I can vary other elements of the outfit.

OP posts:
DappledThings · 25/07/2019 19:52

It's completely fine to wear the same outfit. Of course it is. Anyone who would be bothered by their mother/MIL wearing an outfit she's worn before at their wedding has very odd priorities.

Pipandmum · 25/07/2019 19:52

Wearing an outfit twice for different weddings is fine but I wouldn’t for my own children.
However I felt I couldn’t wear the same outfit in two different weddings and my family were the only ones at both! I didn’t buy anything new for either.

chipsandpeas · 25/07/2019 19:54

i know someone who did this but they got the dress and matching jacket dyed so it was a different colour

Neverender · 25/07/2019 19:55

My DM wore the same to her three children's weddings. 15yrs from 1st to last and she looked amazing.

NerrSnerr · 25/07/2019 20:02

Do the people who are saying not to wear the outfit really judge women for this? Do people actually notice the exact outfit someone wears?

I'd wear it if you want to.

Why do women have to have a new outfit for such occasions but a man could wear the same suit and tie for 20 years and no one would care?

Sceptre86 · 25/07/2019 20:03

No unless you have money troubles, treat yourself to a new one. It can potentially come across like you couldn't be bothered to make any effort, which for your children's weddings would be a shame. Plus you may find that your kids have got a specific colour scheme in mind and your previous outfit might not be suited.

HeadintheiClouds · 25/07/2019 20:04

I wouldn’t see an issue with this.

Lochroy · 25/07/2019 20:05

No. You can wear it again to other weddings, toned down if needs be so not too mother of the bride, but not the same outfit to another DC's wedding.

MrsMiggins37 · 25/07/2019 20:06

Ashamed to say I had a bridezilla tantrum when my mum suggested wearing the same to my wedding as my sister’s (I got married 7 months later)

I know now with the benefit of hindsight and umpteen years of realising that kind of thing matters jack shit it was wholly unreasonable but it made me feel sort of second best and not very happy at the time. Like my sister was worth getting a new outfit for but not me.

Ragwort · 25/07/2019 20:07

No one would think twice if a man wore the same suit Hmm, I’ve got a ‘best dress’ that I wear at every special occasion, had it over 25 years Grin. Yes, all the photos are of me in the same dress, but who really cares?

1CantPickAName · 25/07/2019 20:09

Yabu, get a different outfit. People WILL notice!!

HeadintheiClouds · 25/07/2019 20:10

Why wouldn’t you, Ragwort? A wedding outfit that’s effectively disposable because you’re not “allowed” to wear it again is an alien concept to me.

Disfordarkchocolate · 25/07/2019 20:14

My MIL wore the same outfit to our wedding that she has to her eldest son. I was annoyed he'd been worth a new outfit but we hadn't. It's a bit stupid but how I felt.

DappledThings · 25/07/2019 20:15

People WILL notice!!

What people? To be at both weddings of a pair of siblings you would most likely be another relative. So if you went to your cousin's wedding are you really saying you'd notice what your aunt wore to such a degree that you'd notice at your other cousin's wedding it was the same dress? I'm not buying that.

And even if anyone did actually notice what would it matter?

The only time it's inappropriate to wear the same dress to two weddings was when my friend's sister wore her own wedding dress to my friend's wedding. Now that is taking the piss.

NerrSnerr · 25/07/2019 20:17

People WILL notice!!

And if they do does it matter?

DeadBod · 25/07/2019 20:18

No one would bat an eyelid at a man wearing the same suit as they are all pretty bog standard and don't stand out as much as a dress.
My dh wears the same suit to weddings but likes to buy a new shirt and tie to make it look different.