Ok, so my next door neighbour and I have just 'had words' for the first time. We've lived next door to each other for 20 years with no problems, we chat over the fence etc, usual stuff. She's 71 and lives alone, I live with my 13 year old since my divorce in 2011. Both houses are small modern semis.
So last year, during school hols, she mentioned that my son 'running' up the stairs after she had gone to bed was waking her, or stopping her sleeping. I wasn't sure what she meant by 'running' because as far as i'm aware he just does what every normal kid does...he goes up quickly, but he doesnt 'run', and I can't say I've ever thought it was unusually noisy. But anyway, I apologised, and said I would remind him to walk as much as I could. So I did, every night for weeks because I didn't want her to be disturbed, obviously. Then I asked her had things improved and she said 'yes, I haven't heard a thing'. Great. All sorted.
Anyway, last night my son, his friend and I arrived home from holiday after a four hour car journey about 10.20pm. We unloaded the car, and they did run up and down the stairs laughing and calling to each other, carrying stuff up, which I didn't know they were doing as I was still out by the car. It was ten minutes max, and when I heard them I told them to stop because neighbour might be disturbed, and they did stop straight away and all was quiet for the rest of the night.
But this morning, I was putting washing out and she had a right go at me about them running up the stairs, saying it was 'so loud I had to bang the wall, they woke me up and I couldn't get back to sleep'... she was really quite blunt and aggressive. I was really surprised and I just thought 'Not this again, and this time it's really daft- it was literally ten minutes'. So I said I'm sorry, but they'd been cooped up in a car for hours, it was ten minutes maximum and to be honest, I think you are being unreasonable expecting 13 year old boys to not run up stairs, it's what children do'...And then she said "oh well. he's been doing it for months, ever since I first told you about it, I've been putting up with it "...WTF? I asked why, in that case had she lied and said she couldn't hear anything anymore when I asked her last year, sand she said 'Because I knew you'd be the sort of person who wouldn't like me saying it".
Now, I've never had a cross word with her before, yet somehow she assumes I'm going to be troublesome over this one thing?
Anyway, I did say that I thought that was completely unfair, and and that I think she's being ridiculous complaining about a kid going up the stairs in his own house, in a completely normal way.
Apparently she can 'tell what sort of a person I am now, too'.
So...basically, am I BU or is she? Should I be reminding my son to walk quietly up the stairs every night? He's in bed himself by 11pm even in school holidays, it's not like he's galloping up and down stairs at 2am. I honestly have never heard of anyone moaning about their neighbour's child going up the stairs. But, please feel free to correct me, as I m genuinely wondering now if I AM being a bad neighbour.