Bringing sweets for my kids all the time

[Ineedtoknowit]

Tell me I’m BU if I am! Dh thinks I am.
Every time the kids’ grandma sees the kids (age 4and 7) she brings them a treat bag, consisting of a fruit shoot, a packet of crisps, sweets and chocolate bar. She sees them every week to 2 weeks on average. Even if we go to the cinema etc with them they will bring same treat bag even though I will have brought a drink and some small snacks already.
I try not to have many treats in the house as when we do, the kids constantly ask for them and I mean constantly. So when she brings them treats all the time I feel it causes me a problem as I then have a battle at home. They often bring sweets home from parties and school fairs, and are given a LOT for birthdays, Easter, Christmas, so it feels like I can never have a sweet free house or anywhere close to. Her response when I said they’re always pestering me For treats is to tell them they can have bread and butter. Obviously I can and do offer other things but it never stops the pestering.
The other issue is the single use plastic bottles that fruit shoots are in. This drives me mad as we’re trying to cut down on single use plastic.
Maybe I’m BU and I know treats from a grandparent is normal but I feels it’s too much. The other grandparent who sees them much less frequently will bring a colouring book or something, never treats.

Should I ask her to cut it down or am I being over the top?

@EatingBreadAndHoney no it doesn’t have a use by date on but it goes rotten if it doesn’t get eaten

“But if you are going to ask your MIL to lay off the sweet bringing do try to do it in a way that won't hurt her feelings.”

Don’t be silly. Mils don’t have feelings!

YANBU. It’s frustrating and disrespectful when you have politely mentioned it to her already. We have the same with my in laws, although my children are quite a bit younger. They always come out with the “it’s our job as grandparents to spoil the kids” which annoys me so much, because it’s actually setting them up for bad habits/poor health for life (in fact DH lost 6 stone when he moved to uni after being an obese child due to his diet ). I also agree that sweets/junk are handed out EVERYWHERE (parties, nursery etc) and it annoys me that the DC have ice cream/cake several times a week at nursery. There’s just no excuse when we know what we now know about sugar, and it stops it being a proper “treat”.

Tbh it would annoy me for my kids to eat crisps that often. My kids very rarely have crisps and I intend on keeping it that way. Same for sweets. So yes every week to 2 weeks is too much in addition to treats they get from friends at school etc. If they are pestering you then clearly there is an issue. So yes I'd kindly ask if she could consider other treats, a t-shirt, a colouring book etc and also not to always have sth as I find the expectation of a present each time does distract kids from the pleasure to see a loved one.

And yes spoiling kids shouldn't equate giving them junk food! No wonder our relationship to food is so messed up!

I wouldn't like this either. I don't think you are being unreasonable.

I'd just ask her to bring non food/drink treats if she feels she needs to bring something.

Way too much sugar imo.

OP, just because you are getting so many treats given to you doesn't mean that your kids actually have to eat them.
We take all excess sweets, chocolate and crisps to work. There they are eaten by happy adults and we have zero crap at home. It's win-win.

We have always done this as there is no way the kids could eat all the chocolate they get for Easter, Halloween, etc. And we don't eat it either. You don't actually have to give it to the kids and if it's out of the house they can't ask you for it.

Yanbu

You have a clear idea if what diet you want your children to follow.
It isn't being adhered to.

Yanbu that would annoy me too.

I kind of feel your pain as my MIL always brings loads and loads of cake every time we see her and it gets too much. But I think once a week to once a fortnight is fine for that amount of treats. It shouldn't make your kids pester for them at home if you never buy them yourself. You must buy them sometimes for them to pester you? You are not being unreasonable about the fruit shoots though. I'd tell her that the kids love the treat bags, but can she switch to cartons of juice?