AIBU to think that if your child leaving primary school is one of the hardest days of your life, you've had an easy life?

[Doyoumind]

Don't get me wrong. I understand it's a day full of emotions. I just saw someone make this statement on SM and think it's overly dramatic. If that's the worst life has to throw at you, you must be blessed.

Bizarre sentiment, isn't going to high school an exciting thing?

It's an expression. Don't over think it

Everything is made into a big deal these days... Nursery "graduations", big year 6 leaver events/parties, more emphasis and pressure on Y11 leavers parties/proms.

It makes things 'bigger' than they need to be.

It's a milestone. They're emotional. You're over thinking it.

Parents making a big song and dance like that doesn’t help the child either as it makes it a bigger/more emotional thing than it needs to be

So what if someone is finding it difficult? And so what if they have had an easy life? It’s not a race to the bottom, is it?
I wouldn’t get worked up about this and read between the lines. It’s a figure of speech used by someone who is maybe feeling a little emotional over their child growing up, or whatever. No need to sneer.

YA DEFINITELY NBU!

And so what if it is? Personally I and many friends found it hugely emotional, but not as painful as the death of a parent, or a child, illness of a brother, breakup of a relationship. Some people have never have experienced those things and so yes, their baby leaving the comfort of primary school to go on to scary big school may be the hardest thing they've gone through.

It's a shame that you think it's OK to make judgy comments on SM about someone else's pain

I think leaving primary is quite a significant moment. For a lot of parents they will be having to give their children more responsibility (bus to school, keys to get in/lock up) and a lot of friendships will be changing. So yes it probably is hard for various reasons... Possibly over the top to say hardest day of their lives but they may have other things playing on those emotions

I dont get it either. Our nursery did a graduation too! Wtf. I will be a little emotional but it's really not that much of a big thing if any thing its exciting.

I remember when DS left Primary School.

At the leaver's assembly they walked around offering parents tissues...

Bitch, please.

gokart once someone posts on social media - and it was accompanied by a boast about their child - they are putting themselves out there to be judged.

I get the being proud and emotional. It's the hyperbole I object to.

to make judgy comments on SM about someone else's pain

It may be hard, but children are SUPPOSED to grow up. That's what being a parent is about, helping them grow and develop and become adults. So, YANBU.

My daughter finishes next Tuesday. It will be an emotional day and will mark a massive change in my life as the last 8 years have been devoted to primary school - supporting, volunteering. I have watched a little group of children grow from tiny 3/4 year olds to an amazing and interesting bunch of personalities.
Tuesday will not be 'the worst day of my life' but it will be very sad and leave me a little bit lost until I figure out the next stage of my life.

*doyoumind

Maybe if you had explained the context in your original post, the responses may have been different. Dripfeeding information actually makes your original post even more unreasonable.

It's a shame that you think it's OK to make judgy comments on SM about someone else's pain

Pain? PAIN?!! Hahahahaha

YANBU Ds2 (my youngest) finished primary yesterday. There was emotion (and sadness) from parents and children alike. Leaving a chapter of your life behind is often hard to do. Still it's not been within a country mile of being the hardest day of my life and my life has not been noted for its hardship.

I'm guessing that you haven't had the stress of looking at secondary schools yet OP, or that stage is far behind you? It is a big change for some parents as well as the child. Certainly not the worst day of my life when it happened, but it is a stage in life.

You’re overly invested bookmum

At the risk of coming over all Four Yorkshiremen (and I am from Yorkshire), I believe the trend over the past few decades for making every transition a big deal has contributed to children feeling more stressed than they should.

I moved from Junior school to secondary in 1969 (the move from infants to Junior was marked purely by being walked in a crocodile from one school to the other on the first day of the school year - we hadn't even gone for a visit beforehand). We did an afternoon visit with our parents at which we got speeches and the chance to buy school blazer badges and ties. Junior school marked the end of our careers there with nothing more than a "goodbye" from our class teacher. We thought nothing of it at all, but were excited to be going to secondary school where we would get to learn French and separate sciences.

I understand parents finding it a bit hard when their child actually starts school, especially if they've been SAHP. But moving from one school to another - meh.

YANBU but then I'm not the overly emotional type anyway to be honest. I didn't cry when DS started school or anything, it's something that all kids do! It's just a stage of life.

No one's saying that it's not emotional and that change isn't big and scary though. But the worst day of your life? Really?

I was sad when my eldest left primary school. She was bereft as her best friend was going to a different secondary school. I really felt for her and it made the whole end of an era thing more real.

However I would say that the worst days of my life were around family bereavements, relationship shocks, that kind of thing. It's a bit over the top to say that something that every primary school child ultimately has happen to them is worse than some fairly shitty life events imo.

I am similar in finding the high emotion and 'woe is me' from people whose children are leaving home a little overdone. As though they have absolutely no life outside their children. Perhaps I'm biased, having had five, one of whom stuck around at home until she was twenty four, and I'm sorry, but the day she left was the BEST DAY OF MY LIFE!

So yes, OP, just wait until the little treasures are off to university, and then maybe block her on social media...

I think this kind of milestone in children's lives can make parents evaluate what has gone before and acknowledge the passing of time. It's the end of an era in their children's lives and can symbolise a shift where their children move away from their family unit and parents and start to forge their own independent lives. I think the sadness that people feel isn't necessarily about leaving primary school but about accepting that their children are growing up and that the children's lives and their parents' role within it will be fundamentally different.

I also think it can make parents lament missed opportunities knowing that you won't get to relive those lost days again. I think the ABBA song Slipping Through my Fingers captures this sentiment really well, especially this bit

^What happened to the wonderful adventures
The places I had planned for us to go?
Slipping through my fingers all the time
Well, some of that we did, but most we didn't
And why, I just don't know^