WIBU - telling friend she's feeding her baby 'wrong'

[BarryMcguigan]

A friend I have drifted apart from (old work colleague no hard feelings or issues) has put up a pic of her just turned 6 months old sat in high chair with a big pile of blueberries- not cut in half or squashed. (I'm her instagram)

WIBU to private message saying it's best practice to cut them in half or is that really twatty of me?! I know she is going down the BLW route which I also did but the oic made me a bit nervous. My LO has done really well with BLW and I have no anxiety about this method at all - but followed best practice for grapes / blueberries etc.

For all those asking my HV told me and it's just something I stuck to

You'd look twatish and also wrong I would have thought, I have never heard on blueberries being cut up.

Go ahead and PM her. She can choose to think it's silly advice and ignore but she may also not be aware that they are considered choking hazards and be happy that you brought it to her attention. Better to be safe than sorry.

We did BLW and cut round foods like grapes and blueberries in half at that age.

The windpipe of a toddler only has the diameter of a drinking straw- a blueberry could definitely block it. I've always cut them up for DD.

babygooroo.com/articles/10-most-common-choking-hazards

Wrt op- I'd say leave it.

Actually I just seen that a baby choked on one in a supermarket so I was wrong and apologise. If you do message her just be very tactful in the wording.

I did BLW and have never squashed or cut up blueberries. Never read that you had to - I thought it was just grapes and cherry tomatoes.

Well I would cut blueberries. A friend had her child almost choke on a blueberry. She hadn't cut it but we all (our nct group) did after that!

I probably wouldn't message her though as you aren't close.

as I would rather be safe than sorry

But if you take that to its logical conclusion, everyone would eat nothing but pureed food.

We have to manage risk sensibly.

For sure Laurie, we can’t keep kids wrapped in bubble wrap in an empty, sterile room, and as parents we will all have slightly different risk appetites.

I read a newspaper article yesterday about a grown man who choked on meat in a restaurant. I haven’t stopped my DD having meat as a result. While the risk is there, it must be very small, and we all have to eat. On the other hand, round blueberries of the same size of a small child’s trachea, with slippery skins, will definitely be cut for the time being. As to me, they pose a higher risk, and it’s only a minute or two to mitigate it.

Going against the grain but I would probably message her if I was you OP. Blueberries are bigger than they used to be and I would squash or cut them - she might also not be aware of grapes. Just phrase it as non-twattish?

It’s twatty to use the phrase “best practise” outside of a work context regardless of what you’re patronising her about.

She's not "wrong" though is she? She's just taking a risk in your eyes.

I never cut up blueberries with my children (now teenagers) it never occurred to me as they were so small but I probably will with my next one as I had a few choking incidents with them (none of the usual suspects though incidentally - first some bacon, second some potato) however I wouldn't say anything to this woman, it's her call if she wants to take no notice of certain risks.

I never once cut blueberries...

I've never cut blueberries up, who has time to do that?

and as parents we will all have slightly different risk appetites.

Well I totally agree with that.

I see no particular reason to be worried about blueberries, but in the course of looking stuff up today I notice that a third of choking deaths of small children come from latex balloons.

I had no idea of that and I'll be making sure that balloons are firmly out of reach from now on.

Popped balloons are lethal if inhaled as they are incredibly difficult to remove from the wind pipe when a child is choking. I usually leave kids parties with a pocket full of balloon bits that I collect up as balloons pop.
Another bad choking hazard that people are not always aware of is those tiny marshmallows that go on top of hot chocolate. They are popular for a kids treat in cafes, but they are very light and easily inhaled, once inhaled they go very sticky and hence very difficult to remove.

Yes, the balloon thing is scary, Laurie, you can so easily see how it would happen, and when they were just trying to do something fun.

Also hotdogs. Which seem to be the leading cause of choking deaths in the US.

And popcorn. Which many of my friends allow their small children to eat with no qualms whatsoever.

you can so easily see how it would happen, and when they were just trying to do something fun.

Exactly

Why? Oh why? MYOB

I’m looked at like a loon by other mums and the nursery staff when I say no to popcorn. So be it.

I think it used to cut up the big ones. Small ones surely could be swallowed?? Might hurt going down but wouldn’t cause the baby to choke to death unless I’m not getting something..

Is that serious that in some countries they don’t recommend whole apples?? My 3 year old prefers hard, raw fruit and veg and if he didn’t eat a few apples and whole, raw carrots a day his food intake would be quite minimal!

I had no idea of that and I'll be making sure that balloons are firmly out of reach from now on.

I’m terrified of balloons so thankfully they don’t end up in our house often. I can well believe children choke on them a lot. Imagine biting it, it’s pops, shits the kid up and they inhale. Doesn’t bare thinking about actually.

Put down your phone - and go and do something that benefits you greater than judging someone about blueberries.

It’s not judging!! It’s informing somebody of something they may not know. I would be grateful, personally.

‘A grape is the exact right size to block a windpipe’...... surely it depends on the size of the baby and the size of the grape? some blueberries are massive!! (Yes I’m a cutter 😄)