...to wonder whether my daughter (aged 8) will EVER love reading?

[NetflixandWill]

It's a daily battle to get DD (aged 8) to read.

Her friends have long been reading for pleasure, but she just doesn't enjoy it and resists her daily reading for school.

We've tried old classics, new favourites, anything that appeals to her when we visit a bookshop. We've let her pick what she wants at the library. We've watched films and listened to audiobooks and then sought out the books.

As a childhood bookworm and lover of reading now, I despair at the magic she's missing.

I know IABU and I should chill/not make it a source of friction - but AIBU to ask you to share stories of your own reading-haters who eventually learnt to love books? (And at what age?)

Me! I hated reading as a child. Used to pretend to read books and fill in my school reading diary using the blurb and reading the last few pages. I love reading now, just wish I had more time to do it.

My dd
Until she was in about 12. At that age she did read for pleasure but not avidly. She read 'light fiction ' stuff about girls her age.
She would read a comic and that was the limit at age 8. She loved the library and being read to as a toddler.
Never pushed it.
In her 20s now she reads regularly about a book every 2 months.

Thank you @Rollerbird !

And thanks too @Damnthatonestaken1 - can you remember at what age it clicked?

Probably started reading for pleasure in my teens and more avidly in my twenties ☺️

My oldest daughter was the same and loves to read now. Be patient and show her a good example by keeping on reading

Thank you

I suppose the other side of my worry is that she is obsessed with any screen - telly (particularly YouTube), tablet, phone - and I want to strike a better balance with reading.

I do sympathise - I loved TV as much as reading when I was her age and probably work have chosen it over books if given the choice.

I love reading, DS hates it. It’s not a bad thing. People like different things

You're right @poppy2021

She complains that I'm always reading

I just need to work on being patient....

Hated reading at that age too. My mum bought me a whole bunch of audio CDs that I'd listen to at bedtime (and in the car sometimes) Jaqueline Wilson, Michael morpurgo that sort of thing. I loved the stories just not the reading bit, but did eventually get into it in my early teens. Would really recommend audio books as a way of encouraging vocabulary, imagination and storytelling. And it could spark an interest in reading.
Also, they've just started the summer reading challenge at the libraries. Could check it out? The kids get a little sticker / prize and encouragement for reading a book a week for 6w and a raffle at the end.

DSis was the only non bookworm in the family until she went on holiday with friends at 14 (and their parents!) and took ‘The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy’ with her. She’s got an English Literature degree and is probably the best read of us all 20 years later...

Kids who dislike reading generally are struggling to understand the words, by that I don't mean what they say, they can read them and say them outloud, but what they actually mean & what they mean in context.

If you work on that then she should come to love reading a lot more.

Yeah I get that @BullBullBull

I know I can't force her - far from it. I live in hope though!

Hi @SuzieQ10 thank you but sadly the audiobooks are lukewarm (she mildly enjoys them) and library challenges leave her cold, even for a sticker or chocolate! But maybe one day it'll click!

@Tallgreenbottle yeah there's definitely a lack of comprehension - it's impossible to enjoy something you're not digesting! So I go back and re-read things, or do one page her, the next me, and talk about the story to see what she's taken in. She just doesn't like it.

I was a massive bookworm I cannot remember learning to read. At age 7 I had read the hobbit and the first lord of the rings book. I loved it. My DD7 loves it. My DS10 hated it with a passion until about 2 months ago.

Some kids find it harder and therefore not as enjoyable. I tried so many different things but honestly just sticking with it and reading with him often as well as taking turns to do the reading worked eventually. I’m not sure he will ever love it like I do but he now willingly picks up books and reads them. Not as often as his tablet but it’s progress. I have considered getting him a kindle or kobo that is JUST an e-reader to see if that makes a difference but don’t really want to waste money if it doesn’t.

So do not despair! Your child is still young and there is plenty of time yet. Some people I know didn’t read for fun until they were adults. Male and female. And others...my husband doesn’t read ever. But she has so many more years to be inspired by the stories and knowledge that are available in books and she probably will be eventually.

@DelurkingAJ good point. I have a hunch that it will be the influence of a friend that finally grabs her attention!

@DanceItOut thank you so much! I know, logically, that I should just sit back and let nature take its course.

Hi @NetflixandWill, sounds like my DD. She resisted spellings, hated the library, would arch her back in boredom at the very thought of reading. She turned out to be Dyslexic... School didn't pick up on it because she was bright and many of her teachers seemed to think that it wasn't possible to be both.

My DS barely read anything until he was 11 and when he did it was only non-fiction. Then in year 6 his teacher started reading InkHeart to the class and told me he was enjoying it so I started reading it to him at night (even though I'd stopped that years before!) after a couple of weeks he started to carry on reading after I left the room and he ended up reading all the books. After that I introduced him to Hunger Games which he loved (and even DD got into those and she never reads at all) then Harry Potter and Percy Jackson. He loves reading now :)

@Wilkolampshade sorry to hear dyslexia was hard to pick up in this day and age.

@Titsywoo gives me hope, thank you

I am a bookworm but my younger sister didn't like reading. I don't know when this changed - maybe late teenage/early twenties - but now she loves reading crime fiction, true crime, detective novels etc. Maybe your DD just hasn't found her "thing" yet?

Do you read to her? I had a lot of periods of illness as a child and my mum would read to me. I remember her reading Harry Potter to me in hospital and I was about 12 so quite old.

I have never enjoyed reading books, haven’t read since I left school and am nearly 40. my DS also has no interest...

Did you see the thread recently about an OP who had discovered she had no (I'm paraphrasing) visual imagination? (Or that was my understanding of it) I'm wondering if people cannot 'see' a picture in their mind's eye, they might not be able to build the visual imagery necessary to really get into a story? Wonder if this could be a factor?
Can anyone remember what the condition is called??

My DS was 11 when he found the love. Turned out that he has visual processing disorder so reading was physically demanding on him. Once he had overlays he realised that the words aren’t meant to smoosh together and wiggle about.

He quickly started the Harry Potter books, alternating books with audiobooks. He’s now 14 and prefers biographical books or history of conflict books and the occasional graphic novel. However, he happily reads.

My daughter is 22 and never, ever has. She is articulate and has a good vocabulary, spells well and acheived A* in 2 A levels. Ill never understand it!