To think the other mum should have folder HER buggy?

[FairfaxAikman]

Our local bus company has introduced vehicles with exit doors halfway down.
It means that while they used to have a wheelchair space AND a buggy space, there's now only a wheelchair space, which is not so great for those of us in the sticks surrounding the city as there's always more than one person with a pram gets on from our village.

We don't often get the bus so don't have an umbrella type pram but I accept I have to fold it if the space is not available on the bus .

However today pissed me off a bit - the space was taken by a umbrella style pram with a child of about five in it. I thought the child might have mobility problems, but nope when it came to their stop (several miles down the road) the child got up and walked off.

The mother had watched me struggle to take the seat containing a sleeping DS off the frame, fold the frame and then wedge myself and DS (and seat) into one of the priority seats (as it was the only one with enough space for me to do this)

AIBU to think common sense would dictate that she should offer to fold hers so I don't have to struggle with mine?

Before anyone accuses me of being entitled I didn't say anything and certainly wouldn't demand this but I know if the situation was reversed then I definitely would have offered to fold mine.

YANBU, although she wasn't obliged to fold she was an arse for not doing so. Selfish cow.

YANBU but people are often lazy, selfish dicks.

I generally avoid folding my buggy because of back issues but a sleeping child takes priority over that imho. She was being a bit of a dick.

This happens to me all the time. I do offer to fold mine but it's really annoying when someone doesn't bother when they could more easily.

Nope I disagree with you. WHEELCHAIRS have priority not other pram users. She only needs to fold for a wheelchair user not you or anyone else with a pram. She was there first. I hate when people get on with a pram and think because they have a younger baby, more shopping, bigger pram or whatever that they have more priority. It doesn’t work like that.

I think some people are embarrassed to offer or draw any attention to themselves. It can be shyness rather than rudeness. I would have folded mine if I had the umbrella. It's just the right thing to offer.

Edinburgh by any chance? So many people are complaining about the lack of space that we have been used to for so long.

She was being a dick, but I’d be wondering what reason she had for a child of that age to be in a buggy.

I agree with BigRed she was there first and the only person she should move for is a wheelchair user.

A child with hypermobility syndrome or EDS can walk off down the street and still need a buggy.
It’s first come first served re prams.

She was being a dick, but I’d be wondering what reason she had for a child of that age to be in a buggy.
Are you always so nosy?

Ds uses a buggy and he is 9 (but looks more like 5). He can walk but has physical issues that affect his mobility, he also often needs to be in the buggy for safety or sensory issues. We use it on the bus to get to appointments.

If it hadn't been possible to get ds out of the buggy (his old one couldn't fold or he was unable to get out for other reasons) then I would have helped you fold the buggy or held a child to help though.

It would be courteous for the one with the easiest situation to fold their buggy. We can assume it was her, and therefore she should have, or there may have been a reason why she didnt/couldn't.

When I had an umbrella style, I'd always fold if needed regardless of who was on the bus first.

The bus driver shouldn't have accepted a second buggy though if there wasn't capacity.

Are you always so nosy?

No I’m being considerate actually, my own daughter was in a buggy til a late age for reasons that couldn’t be seen

Coco yes, Edinburgh.

To everyone saying wheelchairs take priority- well obviously 🙄. However that argument isn't relevant to this particular situation where there was no wheelchair.
I'd already had to miss two buses due to lack of pram space and living in the sticks the Sunday service is only half hourly.

She was there first so she got the space and was under no obligation to fold up for another pushchair, that's life. It's rather crass to speculate that she's selfish/lazy/an arse when you and we have no idea about her, her DC, or anything going on in her life.

I can see both sides. Yes, it was a pain for you but you don't know the other woman or her child or what kind of day they've had. Some 3 year olds look much older, you never know. The other mum might have taken ages to calm a tantrum and known that the child would get really upset if asked to get out and it might have caused a big scene. The woman might have had a bad night and be exhausted. I'd probably feel like you OP but think we should probably think that sometimes there might be really valid reasons why someone else isn't doing exactly what we want them to!

Local buses here have the rule that first on gets the buggy space and anyone else getting on is expected to fold theirs. Never thought it was particularly fair but prehaps the other person was working on that assumption

It would have been nice. But she isn't obliged. I wouldn't get so annoyed over it, she's not worth it. And you might get to return the favour one day..

However that argument isn't relevant to this particular situation where there was no wheelchair.

On our bus service a special needs buggy also counts as a wheelchair, was it maybe a sn buggy?

As soon as I read this I was "EDINBURGH". It's a pain in the arse!

Of course she's not obliged but life is easier when we all try and do what we can to make life easier when someone else is struggling.
Of course her DD could have needed to be in there, and OP didn't say anything, but I've also had to stand and push the point because the driver has aid I can't get on and the buggy in the SPACE is EMPTY. Some people are just selfish

Empty buggy in the space is an entirely different matter, the buggy in the space on this occasion was not empty.

Good God this is why I drive you had to wait an hour and a half then disassemble your pram with a sleeping baby in it. Fuck that

People are busy focusing on their stuff and their priorities. In my experience you do have to ask. It’s easier for them to sit and do nothing (sadly).

Hazey it was a bog standard Joie umbrella buggy