What makes a person ‘posh’ ?

[ethelfleda]

Yep - blatantly inspired by the other thread!
What do you think makes a person posh? Judging by the other responses it’ll be no tattoos, no swearing and never visiting a Greggs

(Lighthearted!)

Haha

The poshest people I know have the odd tattoo, usually acquired whilst travelling during their GAP year, swear like troopers and and don’t give a fuck what people think of them so will eat Greggs if they want.

Posh is pretty subjective to many people I’m posh because I speak with neutral southern English accent, have a well paid job and I’m educated. To others I’ll be a pretty normal woman with a MC upbringing.

I think my manager is posh.

Privately educated (at a top school, not one where you just pay for a fancy swimming pool)
Oxbridge educated to Masters level
Lives on about 20 acres of land with her equally posh husband, horses and labradors
All three children at boarding school
Represented GB in the olympics for modern pentathlon
On a team day having afternoon tea at a national trust property casually mentioned that her mum went to tea with the family as a child (before it was given to NT)
Drives a beaten up land cruiser but has an engagement ring the size of my fist

The least posh thing about her is that she chooses to work.

no swearing

ha ha

Also think my MIL is posh. Again, similar education and background (except grew up in expat Nigeria and boarding school here) but married my very working class FIL.

She is very nice, and for the most part has assimilated into normal middle class, however she still can’t bring herself to use tinned tomatoes or buy a ready made meringue.

however she still can’t bring herself to use tinned tomatoes or buy a ready made meringue

I have been told I’m posh because I say mowing the lawn not cutting the grass.

Having lots of money and being first class on a cruise.

Portside out, Starbound in. To enable them to have the sun on both journeys

HTH Just being literal and showing a bit of knowledge.

home, not in

Top private school education, house with land or country estate, upper class accent, part of the Old Boy's network, shooting, horses, know the Royals, call parents mummy and daddy, wives often dont work, husbands in military or finance. Have black lab
I absolutely know one family who tick every single one of those stereotypes!

Not buying new but waiting for the second hand uniform sale. I lived in an area where more than half the school intake was eligible for school meals but second uniform sales never had any takers. Moved to an area where only a hand have free school meals and they clamour over the second hand uniform sale 🤷‍♀️
Oh and accents - much softer, all the letters and no swearing. I’ve learnt to rein myself in a bit. The head of pta said I’m good at signing people up - I’m seen as loud and scary. And being common as muck I will never understand why you would choose to buy second hand when I can afford new.

Where I live I'm considered to be "posh" because my accent is different (I grew up 200 miles away), I have a degree AND work in the field I studied (lucky me, that's why I moved 200 miles from friends and family, in order to work) I had my first child in my mid 30s (and that child likes pesto!), I bake my own bread and I try to be as environmentally friendly as possible.

OP, I think you're assuming that posh is the opposite of common. But that really isn't how it works. There's the whole gulf of middle class between them. Often there's a lot more in common between those who are really posh and those who are really at the other end of the scale. It's only middle class people who care about not swearing or not eating Greggs, or whatever. No one else cares at all.

The Port Out Starboard Home thing is widely known to be completely made up!

My friends think I'm posh because my family had a big house with money and I had ponies but I'm not really , just compared to their childhoods I am I guess...

Posh people have a room for their wellies dogs and horses, antique furniture passed down to them etc. Oh and 'grounds'

They probably have staff as well come to think of it...

You can be upper, middle, working or lower class and be common. It’s a case of having taste or not, money can’t buy class...

Anyway. The ‘posh’ people I know actually do have tattoos believe it or not . They generally have messy hair and scruffy clothes too...

You can be upper, middle, working or lower class and be common. It’s a case of having taste or not, money can’t buy class...

Anyway. The ‘posh’ people I know actually do have tattoos believe it or not . They generally have messy hair and scruffy clothes too...

My experience:

Being incredibly tight with money, including when employing “staff”
Driving a battered up 4 x 4 (never buying a new car)
Giant house, but needs a good clean and decorate

Saying 'yes' so it sounds like ears.
A stately home but beat up old car.
Thinking servants at home are normal.
Buying quality over quantity.
Shagging around at shooting parties in someone's country pile.

I had a friend at college who's Dd was a lord. She is a really normal looking and behaving person. They had a proper stately home and servants. But she was the same as the rest of us. I come from a caravan, because my parents were homeless and then a council house. I guess that makes me common!
Like the other thread, it's all like that Monty Python sketch where they look down on each other.
My abusive Mum has a theory that: old money are like us (the middle class), and new money are common. She has very set ideas about people. I personally think anyone can be like anybody.

I’ve been told I’m posh and it’s usually used as a thinly veiled insult.

That said I do live in a part of Scotland where it’s not really hard to be posh. Also means I don’t fit many of the stereotypes above which are very English to me.

My parents met at boarding school and my mum’s family live in Tanzania, going back generations (all doctors).

I went to a private school. I don’t have any tattoos (mainly because I don’t think I have skin worth showing off - moley) I have what taxi drivers always seem to think is a posh accent. I only swear if I think it’s necessary. I grew up on an estate and I don’t mean a Persimmon one. I didn’t have ponies but my next door neighbour’s daughter did. Family pastimes growing up included clay pigeon shooting, salmon fishing and racing vintage cars.

However I didn’t follow some of my posher friends to St Andrews uni or study medicine or law. I married someone who isn’t posh (but isn’t common either). I earn 35k and we live in a nice but normal house and my kids will go to the local primary.

I resent being called posh because as I said it feels like an insult. It’s no more my fault the family I was born into than it is anyone else’s.

I think you can be posh without having loads of money.
Education and values are where it's at.
I like to think of myself as a poverty posh. Doubt anyone who knows me would agree with the posh part

The men wear red trousers

It’s how others see you, if people don’t see you as posh then you never will be, it depends on your peer group and the wealth of the people around you. I was thought to be posh by the company cleaners but not by my well to do friends.

bridgetreilly thanks for the sociology lesson