What makes a person ‘posh’ ?

[ethelfleda]

Yep - blatantly inspired by the other thread!
What do you think makes a person posh? Judging by the other responses it’ll be no tattoos, no swearing and never visiting a Greggs

(Lighthearted!)

Its simple- look at the holiday choices.
Scotland, or anywhere involving grouse or salmon- yes.
Going to stay with granny in the country- yes.
No holidays at all because of school fees but no bursary- yes
No holidays because can't be parted from horses, dogs or river- yes
No holidays because the insurers don't allow your art collection to be left- yes
Summer holidays in hot places- not really
Norfolk and North Yorkshire- yes, if it's to stay with family or friends
Cornwall- only if its your own cottage, and it mustn't be too gucci
Florida- no
Dubai- no
Sandals resorts- no
Mallorca- no unless you are Spanish, then potentially Yes
Cruise- no
All inclusive- definitely no
Static caravan anywhere- obviously no

Simples.

The 'posh' people I've met have all had the following in common with each other:

• great work ethic and attitude

• respectful (not just to other people but to the space around them)

• never discuss money

• speak English properly (little swearing, very clear and grammatically correct)

• quite plain, but nice clothing.

Never advertise wealth, yet never claim poverty.

My DH (33) works, I (23) don't anymore, live on farm in countryside with horses and dogs, I drive a land rover he drives a range rover. We may live comfortably but aren't posh. No posh or 'rich' family, just very lucky re: opportunities and work. I dropped out of school at 15 and did exams at college. neither of us went to Uni. We drop our 'aitches and stick out like sore thumbs in anywhere fancier than greggs.

There is a lady on my facebook who shares photos of her family from the past, all sepia prints of 1920's onwards. All with labels of lady blah or baron blah or Dad with the oxbridge row team... lovely pictures with horses and cars and houses that are just gorgeous and show a casual acceptance of their good fortune and wealth. She goes on the tweed bicycle thing in London and all her siblings and cousin have names like Cecilia and Felicity. She has more photos of king charles cavaliers and other small lap dogs than people, too. Very smart and interesting lady, love seeing all her history... but definitely my definition of posh and classy.

Generally the true upper class are not acquisitive. They have a very nice lifestyle and buy the best consumables i.e. food from F&M, bespoke suits from Savile Row, stationery from Smythson, but they don't buy anything to flaunt their wealth or impress others, and what they do buy will be in service until it is no longer serviceable.

Case in point: Boris Johnson drives a 1995 reg Toyota Previa. An excellent car - roomy and reliable; my dad had a '93 reg version until a few years ago.

As long as the car passes the MOT, it wouldn't occur to the U to replace it. A non-U will trade their car in every couple of years for a new model, on finance, of course.

I've not RTFT but MN loves the old money idea that poshos can only be called thus if they can trace their lineage back to the Normans, live in a fucked old house covered in various levels of filth and animal hair and would serve you shit on a plate (whilst laughing uproarously) if you were invited for a 'kitchen supper'.

And drive a shite car. With a dead labrador in the back.

These people do exist, I know a fair few, but they also exist hand in hand with their siblings, the poshos that have kept on to more than the ancestral house. Because, let's be honest, tiltled people didn't get what they got because they were jolly nice and really didn't give a hoot about such outre notions as social standing. They got where they did because one of their ancestors climbed over others to get there.

Nowt wrong with that, we all want betterment. Just don't be disingenuous and pretend that aspiration is unseemly and uncouth. They were the uncouth ones once and enjoy the spoils of an ancestors thrusting nature.

Anyone who claims to be posh or uses the phrase really aren’t. Who are the deluded people who think posh is a thing are?

No one I know thinks people are posh or give a fuck

Just don't be disingenuous and pretend that aspiration is unseemly and uncouth. They were the uncouth ones once and enjoy the spoils of an ancestors thrusting nature

Yes! This! I also think it's a remarkable con trick on the part of those who are a bit down at heel, to pretend that they like it like that and anything else would be vulgar.

I've been to National Trust Properties. I've seen the mad bling these guys had when they could afford it.
Corridors full of highly gold framed mirrors?
Celing cherubs?
Painted leather murals surrounded by oak panelling?

Not ostentatious at all!

happygolucy My DH (33) works, I (23) don't anymore, live on farm in countryside with horses and dogs, I drive a land rover he drives a range rover. We may live comfortably but aren't posh. No posh or 'rich' family, just very lucky re: opportunities and work. I dropped out of school at 15 and did exams at college. neither of us went to Uni. We drop our 'aitches and stick out like sore thumbs in anywhere fancier than greggs.

Why on earth do you not work at 23 and what does it have to do with being married?

I love the thought of a 23 year-old that has it sussed.

I didn't work at 23 either, left work as soon as I was able to take my mat leave, my ex and I planned for me to be a sahm. Didn't happen in the end but that's another story.
Ageist outrage much?!

Ageist outrage? Is that even a thing? No. Just experience.

It was in relation to incandescent shadow not you hairy, but if you feel the shoe fits as well...

Notions

That’s it, I know people from different backgrounds who think they are posh.
They’re the only ones who think so

I love thread like these...love to hear (and a bit horrified too) how some people seem to idolise the upper classes and their supposed manners towards to those below them and it's funny how they seem to be able to play to the gallery - don't swear(not in front of the hoi polloi), don't covet fancy stuff, don't care about their social status, happy to hang out with the gardener - it's like to some of you they all deserve sainthood! I am constantly amazed by how many people think like this, like they are a treasured British relic - but it's fascinating...as you were!

I think there are levels of posh. Old money & privately educated, then newish money & private education & then those who are not cash rich but are very educated . I wouldn't be considered posh back home in wealthy, rural Warwickshire but here in less wealthy NE London, I am.

Exactly. Plus no posh person would ever waste money needlessly.

Reading through the last few posts.

So living in a city flat that cost ££££ to do up, driving a brand new Range Rover, a wife in designer gear with a Cartier watch and holidaying in the Caribbean is so un-posh now?

Poor Prince William - even the royal family are now chavs 🤣🤣🤣

You have a Grandma and not a Nan!

Wearing a monocle.
Saying "what, what", "jolly" or "crikey" (exception for the latter if Australian).
Having unkempt pubes.

That's it.

Totally agree that upper and middle classes are more distant than upper and working classes. Properly posh people are so at ease with their status they don’t give a fuck about what they wear etc. It’s the aspirational middle classes who obsess about John Lewis and ra4 and being ‘nice’. I confess I am a bit in this bracket myself.