Are we going to be able to survive on this money?

[username6050]

£2,100 between us a month.

Rent is £900.
DP has to pay £400 maintenance.
£450 nursery charges a month.
Will have a 2 year old and a newborn.

It's all seeming impossible!

Overwhelming consensus is a No. OP could answer with a few more details if she would like constructive suggestions rather than guesswork responses.

Sometimes people get pregnant W/O meaning to!.The bare facts given here arent much to go on really.We have no idea how many children this maintenance is for .Surely as others have said here ,the Nursery fees will have to go!.Also may have to look for a smaller place or see if any housing benefit is avaliable?.There is not enough money for food alone left!

@SummerInTheVillage how do you know he's paying too much?

Oh and my comments are not directed towards op, who has not suggested cutting maintenance, but towards the posters who did suggest it.

OP - how have your household income/circumstances changed? Before and after circumstances would be helpful details.

Happily married for 20 years and not living in the UK, not relying on benefits, 49, beautifyl DD and happy life, retired with own house, thanks tired

Not projecting AT ALL, just angry with the 'you are paying too much maintenance posters' HTH

Really, OP, he's paying too much in maintenance, get it reassessed.

Oh, has the OP mentioned how many children the maintenance is going towards?

I genuinely never thought of cutting maintenance and never even thought it'd be an option and wouldn't have wanted to see his reaction if I had (for 2 kids, by the way!)

Ouch! I'm assuming there must be a lot of children in the other house to make it 400pcm

I don't understand how he earns so little when working full time.

I work full time, not in a minimum wage job, and earn £1,400. One and a half times me would be a similar figure to OPs income. Lots of people have similar incomes.

Do his other children never stay over with you?

No Nursery for the 2 year old. £750 for the 4 of you us do-able. It's what I had for myself and DS for years and it included a £75 a month credit card repayment; £50 savings; salon for hair, waxing, manicures and pedicures every few months; and a few activities for DS and weekly Pilates for me.

@blackcatsleeping

You can't understand the earnings? Say he earns 21k and she earns half of that for part time.

@BillieEilish
Thank god you don’t live in the U.K.,
I do. Stick to whingeing about your own countries benefits system. I’m glad mine helps people.

@cosytoaster my first cross post!

It is not enough but then I think you already knew that and still went ahead with a second pregnancy. So now you have to look for a way to make it work. Whether it be cutting short your maternity, an evening job for you or your oh, taking the older child out if nursery or selling anything you can to tide you over.

And no. Don’t think you should consider reducing his maintenance payment as £400 pm for who knows how many children is not the massive amount some on here seem to thin.

paying for nursery is a luxury you cannot afford when on maternity leave sometimes.

"I'm assuming there must be a lot of children in the other house to make it 400pcm"

Yeah, because £50 each for two kids per week is an outrageous fortune, right??!

Glad the OP has a fairer attitude to her step-kids than some on here.

Glad the OP has a fairer attitude to her step-kids than some on here.

Absolutely.

It's not do-able, I think you need to increase your income.

Perhaps you could give up your job, stop paying for nursery and work a couple of supermarket shifts at the weekend? That would increase your income considerably and also give you a discount on your food shopping.

Presumeably, the OP has been managing before a change of circumstances. My DH was made redundant when I was on maternity leave with DC1. I went back to work FT after 6 mths - not what I can originally planned but needs must. We couldn’t afford the drop in household income - as simple as that.

Without further details, it’s obvious that you/DP need to find a way to increase your income whether it’s getting another evening/weekend job to avoid childcare costs. Far from ideal, but that’s the reality for everyone who needs to work to pay the bills.

if you have a newborn, why do you pay for childcare? I would assume you are on mat leave. Is that not the case?

also, if DH has already 3 DH, he should maybe do the maths before going for no 4 (not helpful, I know) but surely you knew the figures before you had another?

3 DC

justbreathing I'll live where I want. I'm English and will support myself and my DD always. No benefits here.
DFTFO

£400 is right for two children even where that lives their father, OP and their two half siblings living on only £350? Okay.