AIBU to let my children play in the garden in the morning?

[SoVeryTired998]

I put my two sons (2 and 1) out in the garden this morning just after 9am, and within minutes the neighbour who's house ours backs onto stuck her head out the window and shouted at me to take the children inside because she has an 11 hour shift and needs to sleep.

I was mortified and say ok I'll take them in, and swiftly picked them up and bunged them inside. She had her window open so I could hear her bitching about me as I did it, and when I went back out to get a toy I could hear her TV on and thought if she can have the TV on then can they now be outside?

So clearly I shouldn't have had them outside so early, what time is acceptable? Should I go and speak to her and see if we can come to some sort of mutually convenient arrangement with regards to my children playing in the garden? I now feel a bit trapped in my house and I don't know when I should let them play outside because I don't want another dressing down from her, we don't exactly live in the nicest of areas so I'm aware of not pissing anyone off as you don't know how it will escalate.

I'm very upset about it all and just looking for some guidance on what other do so please put the kid gloves on

Yeah, those bloody nurses and doctors and paramedics and police officers spoiling everyone’s fun. How dare they expect to sleep off their night shifts. Who do they think they are?!

I've been one of those HCP, working nights and trying to sleep in the day , I and none of my colleagues, expect the world to stop doing what they need to do just because we have another night shift coming up. We buy blackout blinds, earplugs, white noise apps, Nightnurse and hope we can grab a few hours while Joe Bloggs cuts his lawn and children play.

i`ve done nights. never expected the world to stop for me either!

9 is fine. IMO during the week even 7 is fine, people with normal jobs are up and often out by then.

9am is perfectly ok.

After 9 is fine! Tell her to wear ear plugs

One of our neighbours was a window cleaner and moaned about any noise on a morning from my DC’s. Some days he would go back to bed soon after getting back other days he didn’t go to sleep until afternoon it varied. Mine went outside with me when a little older than yours and were allowed to play quietly in our garden after 9am. Any screaming or shouting and I brought them in whatever time of day. However, other neighbours are much less considerate. Neighbour is now retired and has his grandkids and kids round screaming and shouting and making a right racket whenever they fancy.

9 is fine. My bloody neighbour goes out with her toddler about 6.30 at the weekend 🥴

Ah come on got to be respectful.

My father used to tell us to not be really loud and to respect elders so i think just make sure they know not to scream for no reason.

My DH works nightshift and accepts that hearing neighbours cutting the grass, playing in gardens etc is just part of that work pattern. YANBU, your neighbour is.

Absolutely nothing wrong with 9am on a weekday. And I say this as the wife of a night shift worker husband who would be trying to get to sleep at that time.
It's nice of you to bring the kids in HOWEVER, if you get rudeness and bitching from the neighbour, Smyths Toystore has some fantastic children's musical instruments your children would thoroughly enjoy.
In their garden.
Before 9am.

OP Would it be worth a talk with your neighbour? Another former nightshift worker here. I was never woken up because I was so tired I'd probably have slept through a fire alarm. 9am with kids playing quietly is fine. If she had the tv on that's even odder. On hot mornings she might need a window open but she could always shut it and get a fan?

I think at least if you talk to her you can understand whether she's batshit or just needs quiet .... if batshit just avoid.

what have you decided OP?