AIBU to let my children play in the garden in the morning?

[SoVeryTired998]

I put my two sons (2 and 1) out in the garden this morning just after 9am, and within minutes the neighbour who's house ours backs onto stuck her head out the window and shouted at me to take the children inside because she has an 11 hour shift and needs to sleep.

I was mortified and say ok I'll take them in, and swiftly picked them up and bunged them inside. She had her window open so I could hear her bitching about me as I did it, and when I went back out to get a toy I could hear her TV on and thought if she can have the TV on then can they now be outside?

So clearly I shouldn't have had them outside so early, what time is acceptable? Should I go and speak to her and see if we can come to some sort of mutually convenient arrangement with regards to my children playing in the garden? I now feel a bit trapped in my house and I don't know when I should let them play outside because I don't want another dressing down from her, we don't exactly live in the nicest of areas so I'm aware of not pissing anyone off as you don't know how it will escalate.

I'm very upset about it all and just looking for some guidance on what other do so please put the kid gloves on

Oh she’d hate living where we live then! Our garden backs on to an infants school so the noise of your 2 kids would pale in to insignificance to that of 30+ kids at 9am!

It's totally fine, do not give in to her nastiness again. My neighbours were having a kid's party on the weekend, dh was on nights. The noise was ridiculous, but at no point did I complain, because people cannot live their lives around you. She needs earplugs, tough on her.

It's fine like a previous poster I live near a primary school,;from 8.30 am onwards there's up to 300 children running round the playground plus the noice they make on the way to school.

We leave for work/school run at 8 and on a fine morning the DC often scoot around the garden a couple of times before we leave. No screaming obviously but I think it's good for them to stretch their legs a bit, and it's a normal sort of time for people to be up and about. The mornings are often the best part of the day at the moment, what a shame for them to be stuck inside.

Let them play out, 9am is more than reasonable. I do long shifts too but wear ear plugs when I need to sleep in the day. The whole world doesn't revolve around her working hours.

9 am is fine.put them out.and if she shouts.say 9 am is fine thankyou but sleep well.turn round and ignore.and carry on with your life.past this time she does not get to dictate.your kids do not work to her shifts of when they can play or be outside.
of course be wary all the time of screams i think in a morning but no.jog on lady.
would you say to her please wake up and change your shift times because its time for my kids to play out.no so vice versa at a resonable time and being a aware neighbour is just as bollocks.

I'd have sent dc back out and told them to sing. Loudly.

9am is a perfectly reasonable time to be outside of your own house making general noise. If your neighbour has trouble sleeping after a night shift then that's down to her to deal with.

Around here workmen start at 8am. I'd be much happier hearing little children playing in a garden than I would power tools. My GS is out in the garden here as soon as he's up in the summer. So much earlier than 9. As long as kids aren't screeching it's perfectly ok

I also think 9 is fine. Same time goes for weekends I make DC wait until then (or after if I don't want to go out and keep an eye!)

Were they making happy children general playing noises; or uncontrolled screeching and screaming like the little fucker near me?

One is reasonable and to be expected (any 9am is fine). One is out of order any time of the day.

It’s your garden. 9am is a time most people are awake and going about their business. Tell her sorry but your children will enjoy your property as you see fit.

Bollocks to her shift, 9am is a perfectly acceptable time for your kids to be outside. I'd have told her to wind her neck back inside her house.

Good luck complaining to anyone about children playing outside

Were they playing, or were they running around screaming?

9am is ok, but if they are making a whole lot of noise, trying to keep it down would be the neighbourly thing to do.

Nine is fine - and she could've shut her window, for starters.

9am is fine, but excessive noise, IMO, is never fine.

Not saying your kids were, OP, but just suffering the after effects of neighbours' kids literally playing 'who can scream the loudest' at 9pm last night.

I couldn't put a decibel on it, but there's three ranks:

1. The basic noises of living - speaking at a normal volume. Noises of movement. Legit from whenever you wake up.
2. Lively and animated - a bit more loud and frequent. Best kept between the hours of 8-8.
3. Squealing, shrieking, screaming. For emergencies, the park, children's play areas only.

Nine is fine unless they were screaming, in which case you should deal with it anytime. On a week day, eight would be fine by me in the summer. It may sound mean but if you need to sleep during the day you need to cope with noise.

I agree with all the above after 9am is completely fine - if she needs to sleep in the day she needs to take steps to make that possible, blackout blinds, white noise etc. Etc.

Surely she should have tried closing her window before screaming at you in front of the kids?

My god! My neighbours let their barky dogs out at like 5.30 and then shout at them.foe barking! Bit annoying but just part of living near people no?!
Neighbours on other side are building huge extension and start with drilling and huge lorries etc before 8am all week so YANBU at all!
She sounds awful and I would hate to feel like that in my own home so you have my sympathies

As others have said, 9am is fine as long as noise levels weren’t really high. We are the only young family in a quiet row of terraced houses (most have older single occupants). We let our children be children, but it doesn’t hurt them to learn to be considerate of their neighbours either. It’s a tricky balance to strike but I think your neighbour was being unreasonable in this instance. Don’t let it put you off enjoying your garden!

9am is absolutely fine!

I thought you were going to say 6am or something.

9am is absolutely fine, mine were out at 7am this morning. Your neighbour sounds like a grumpy cow, let her moan. If she needs to sleep during day she should invest in earplugs.

Thank you everyone, I will stand firm next time just so she doesn't think she can dictate when my children play. They were just making general baby and toddler babbling noises, they weren't shouting but they weren't exactly whispering and don't understand the concept anyway!

We live on an estate so the houses are all literally on top of each other, maybe she should go live in a cave in the middle of nowhere to avoid any noise whatsoever.

9am is plenty late even on a weekend!