to not want to sign off my emails with preferred pronouns?

[AlphaBites]

We've had an email do the rounds today at work saying in the next few weeks all staff are expected to sign off with their preferred pronouns, to save any embarrassment for any staff.

I don't want to.

Can I fight this somehow?

I do get great joy from the regular 'misgendering' we receive from our DCs school however "Dear Dr Inky and Mrs Smith"

We have this too. And for us, the 'Dr' title is a very convenient opt-out from some of the downright rudeness I've experienced in relation to that infuriating Miss/Mrs question. Men's titles don't indicate their sexual status (or, more likely, availability or otherwise) in this way.

The problem is, women shouldn't have to work a minimum of seven years for that privilege.

What will follow is disciplinary action for "speech crime" and then "thought crime" - and then where will we be.

The only reason I would call an obvious man in a dress and lipstick "she" is because I was terrified of him. Men coercing women - again.

If someone is nice to me and respects me and who I am then that that respect is likely to be mutual. And again - I think everyone has the right to live their life free and as they choose as long as they are not harming others, impacting on others' freedom or dictating the way others should think.
A man should be able to wear what he chooses as should women, but not to pretend he can then force himself into womens' lives and insist they treat him a certain way.

FFS the world's gone mad

Does Article 10 of the European convention on Human rights apply here?
Regarding compelled speech and not being forced to express something you don't believe in.

If it's your pronoun of choice can't you be him he. Even as a woman. Then if you come face to face apologise for error, or say you hoped for a pay rise. Male named sellers on eBay make larger profits, one wee example where it's better to appear Male . I use Male sounding name on line apart from here.

@MarieIVanArkleStinks We have this too. And for us, the 'Dr' title is a very convenient opt-out from some of the downright rudeness I've experienced in relation to that infuriating Miss/Mrs question. Men's titles don't indicate their sexual status (or, more likely, availability or otherwise) in this way. The problem is, women shouldn't have to work a minimum of seven years for that privilege.

I'm also a Dr (non-medical) and I absolutely agree with everything you've said here.

I fear this is coming at my work place. I'm of the opinion that if I see preferred pronouns on a twitter handle, it's a handy pointer that I'm dealing with a twat. I'd just "forget" every time. They can't force you to do it.

This is quite a timely thread as I have just come from a meeting at work where someone proposed we do this. She herself has chosen to after consulting with the Equality and Diversity department.

I don't particularly want to, just because I find it all a bit odd and I don't really give a shit what pronouns people use for me. But it will be interesting to see how it develops.

I get wrongly sexed all the time in work due to a name that can be either male or female, I have a laugh then get on with my day... no exploding heads/death/end of the world....

Why does this bother you though? It takes 2 seconds to add into your email signature, and on the off-chance that you email someone who it affects, you will be helping them feel as though the world is a slightly nicer place.

I get that Mumsnet is very 'gender critical' and I have no problem saying I disagree with what seems to be the general consensus on here, but this isn't infringing on anyone's protected spaces or status, it doesn't hurt anybody, it doesn't take a lot of your time or open you up to abuse or danger, and could genuinely, positively affect someone.

@betweentheacts all of your questions are answered in this thread.

We could turn this around:

Not putting this in your email footer isn't infringing on anyone's protected spaces or status, it doesn't hurt anybody, it doesn't take up any of your time or open you up to abuse or danger, and could genuinely, positively affect someone.

I refuse to participate in the ridiculous circus of ‘gender fluidity’. Gender is a social construct, and I disagree with (and don’t conform to) many Western female gender tropes.

However anyone else chooses to identify themselves or how they feel about themselves is entirely their own business. How I feel about the ridiculousness of telling people ‘I identify as [x] and my pronouns are [x, y, abc z]’ is, equally, my business too.

I don’t ‘identify’ as anything. I don’t label myself as anything. I won’t be mortally offended if someone refers to me as ‘he’. So I won’t be signing off any emails with something I am fully within my rights to regard as pointless and unnecessary,

@betweentheacts - but this isn't infringing on anyone's protected spaces or status, it doesn't hurt anybody, it doesn't take a lot of your time or open you up to abuse or danger, and could genuinely, positively affect someone.

It is impacting negatively on my protected status. Research shows that emphasis on gender/sex disadvantages women due to unconscious bias and stereotyping.

Despite a traditionally female given name, I am frequently called sir in emails. I work in a male-dominated field and the assumption is just made. I wouldn't mind.

My professional certification letter/certificate was sent with the name Mr. S HadItEasy, it took me forever to get it corrected.

I resent being expected to enable the whole thing because it’s an out and out lie isn’t it?
Dave Smith born male can never be a female so why try to guilt trip people into saying what can never be true?
It’s just an attempt to control people’s thoughts and speech. Do we really want a society where everyone just nods along that the emperor is fully dressed?

The only reason I would call an obvious man in a dress and lipstick "she" is because I was terrified of him.

Why would a transvestite male be any more likely to physically harm you than any other man? I’d have thought a bit less likely actually. Do you constantly fear violence from any man whom you offend?

this isn't infringing on anyone's protected spaces or status

Yes it is. Google around the debates currently being played out on the internet and in printed/digital media. It's the very term 'woman' that is being called into question here. With men, as ever, remaining untouched.

it doesn't hurt anybody

Yes it does. It's otherizing the only majority who have traditionally been treated as a marginalized group.

it doesn't take a lot of your time or open you up to abuse or danger

Yes it does. If you are wondering which gender is mostly on the receiving end of abuse - particularly unwanted sexual harrassment - in the workplace then please check out the statistics. Gender is irrelevant to the way in which a person does her/his job.

and could genuinely, positively affect someone.

At the expense of the negative effects on who else? Ah, yes. Women. Again. That makes it okay then

Do you constantly fear violence from any man whom you offend?

The op didn’t say that they constantly feared violence from any man they may offend.

However, it is a legitimate concern: male aggression/violence against women is a widespread and well-documented issue. Surely you’re aware of this?

@betweentheacts
this isn't infringing on anyone's protected spaces or status, it doesn't hurt anybody, it doesn't take a lot of your time or open you up to abuse or danger, and could genuinely, positively affect someone.

It infringes on the rights of women who are quite happy for others to assume them to be male (if they have a unisex name or use initials), in order that they are not discriminated against or treated as inferior. Like JK Rowling.

It infringes on the rights of anyone who believes that biological sex is more important than gender identity, and/or doesn't believe in genderist ideology, which is like a religious belief.

It opens up a door for women to be discriminated against because of their sex.

How could it positively affect someone? Can you be more specific?

It’s a bit stupid but in the grand scheme of things I really don’t see how it matters. On your death bed will you be agonising over your email signature. Doubt it. Get a grip.

@Colourlessgreenidea - I was agreeing with your post BTW - but by taking apart your first statement in that way it looks like I'm taking issue with you personally. That didn't come across in the way I meant it!

But in picking apart those sentiments expressed on this thread that you've summarized very nicely here, I agree with your points 100%!

not coping Google Karen White.

Why does this bother you though? It takes 2 seconds to add into your email signature, and on the off-chance that you email someone who it affects, you will be helping them feel as though the world is a slightly nicer place.

betweentheacts There is, quite literally, an entire thread of people explaining why it bothers them.

There’s no ‘off-chance’ that I’ll email anyone who needs to know my prounouns - via email, we are all without gender. If we are communicating directly we won’t be referring to ourselves in the third person. And if anyone needs to be referred to in the third person via email there’s plenty of ways we can all practise to never need gendered prounous at all.

EG Forwarding on Bob’s email:

Hi X, please see Bob’s email below - could you help them out? Thanks.

Or

Dear X,
I am cc’ing Bob into this conversation as they have asked me to...

“They” is pretty much perfect in all instances- doesn’t assume gender and is polite.

Also, it DOES take up your time. Because now instead of using the perfect ‘they’ as a polite gender-neutral pronoun, you have to refer back to the person’s email signature every time you need to mention them, and get it right. You need to check, because in this atmosphere, getting it wrong could be misconstrued as an act of transphobia. Not everyone will have an email signature on every email they send - often it’s just in the first in a chain, or only to external clients etc- so you’re wasting time checking this shit and worrying about it.

It is a shame that some people feel distress overs pronouns. But on an email signature it is definitely worse than useless and creates issues where there need be none.