Children on Holiday

[BadgerBrush]

I've just come back from holiday with my wife (no children). We spent a week in a quiet countryside retreat type thing, staying in a little self-catering hut. It seems the whole ethos of the place is just to relax and get back to nature. My intention of going there was to spend the week quietly reading on the decking, over looking the fields and forests. There's not really much else to do, and that was fine with me. Each little hut is placed a fair distance from each other, with bushes and trees in between, allowing for privacy. I think the place happily welcomes families, but to be honest, there's absolutely nothing for children to do here, unless they also enjoy a week's worth of reading and looking at the scenery.

However, for the whole week, there was a couple staying in the hut next to our's with a young child - I would say between 1 and 2 years old. The child, unfortunately, was a screamer. The whole time the family was in the hut, the child was screaming. Sometimes in distress, sometimes playfully, but the end result was always the same. I'm usually very tolerant of crying/ screaming children, and are quite sympathetic toward the parents. However, I couldn't help but be really annoyed with these parents. Why would they book a such a holiday when they had such a young child? I'm in no way annoyed at the - he couldn't help it, but the parents must have known what type of this was, and yet willingly allowed their child to encroach on everyone else's peacefulness.

AIBU to be so annoyed at these parents? AIBU to think they could have booked a more family (young child) friendly holiday, and not inflicted their screaming child on everyone else?

@PurpleDaisies my comment was meant to just be a joke. This is Didn’t mean to touch a nerve.

It’s a perfectly acceptable assumption. When you have kids you have a different outlook on holiday expectations. I remember being child free.. wasn’t that long ago. I chose child free resorts mainly for the fact I didn’t want noisy kids around all the time when I wanted to relax. Now I have a child of my own I appreciate that parents can’t help it if they have a noisy child, I obviously can’t go to child free destinations so you just go with it and hope it’s not your child disrupting other people as it can be embarrassing. It’s just as much of an inconvenience on their holiday as it is for other people. It Doesn’t mean they shouldn’t be allowed to have a holiday in the countryside though like the OP seems to think, just because it’s the countryside so it must therefor be reserved for those who want a peaceful holiday.. that’s insane. It’s not dissimilar to camping, surely? Perhaps we should only be allowed to holiday at butlins?! Not that there’s anything wrong with butlins, but it’s your typical family holiday destination but not everyone’s cup of tea either.

YABU there are plenty of places that aren't open to families. You chose one that was, what do you expect?

Just be a bit more careful in future and book adult only complexes.

It does sound annoying, even before you get to the peace and quiet part

It probably doesn’t happen very often, but unless you book childfree places it’s a risk

YANBU... Can't stand permissive, wishy washy parents who allow their children to scream away! It's a very easy thing to train them out of!

Oh shut up whining.

YABU to be annoyed at listening to constant screaming from someone else kid, but YABU thinking they shouldn’t they be there.

Taking a small child to somewhere pretty, where they can play outdoors, go for walks, spend time together is a nice idea. I’d far rather be there than Butlins.

If you really don’t want to hear children, book somewhere that specifies ‘Child free’.

Bloody hell - they're a family on holiday! If you want a child free holiday either specify this or do a Sandals adult resort type one abroad.

Next door to us (I have 2 DC under 10) we have 3 kids between 8, 5 and 2.5 - the 2.5 is a real screamer - tantruming a lot and loudly - however - it's far more distressing for his family than it is for us (they tell us on a weekly basis) and part of terraced house living!

If it's actually advertised as quiet and relaxing then I see where you are coming from

However nature and nothing else around can also be seen as a safe place to let your kids play and explore outside safely - we've done it before and they enjoyed it - and other friends also do it in the summer holidays (all of us have multiple kids so they have play mates and when there is no other option and no internet they do all play together)

YABU. It’s a holiday. You should have booked an explicitly ‘no children’ destination.

Oops, should say YANBU w/ regard to screaming.

I see from previous posts OP that you and your DW are thinking of starting a family soon - god help you if you think you can train a young child out of screaming.

They probably booked there hoping it was going to be further away from neighbours so they wouldn't disturb anyone but themselves. They might have been scared of going to a hotel for fear of disturbing far more people - in adjoining rooms, in the restaurant, by the pool etc.

I can't abide screaming children 😠 YANBU

@... wish washy? train them out of screaming?

It’s developmental behaviour for young children who cannot fully communicate and are easily frustrated.

YANBU

I have kids, but I don't find it acceptable to let them scream and disturb the entire neighbourhood.

I get why some people might want a peace and quiet holiday place - but they can't have it both ways. They want guarantee that their toddler will have silence to nap and sleep, but they should make sure to be as polite and quiet towards others.

It's lazy parenting: either they leave him scream, or they can't be bothered to take him out during the day. There's absolutely no need for a "screamer".

oh god, what a nightmare. If i were them id have packed up early, and probably if i was you too

@BadgerBrush YANBU that would drive me spate! Selfish people. Plenty of places to take their kid where they’d only be disturbing other parents!

It’s developmental behaviour for young children who cannot fully communicate and are easily frustrated.

then work harder to communicate with your kids, don't let them get so frustrated and respect other people around you.

There's always excuse, but there's also always solutions!

**then work harder to communicate with your kids, don't let them get so frustrated and respect other people around you.

• wtaf are you on about.. we are talking about an 18 month old?! You are talking crap.

It’s a perfectly acceptable assumption. When you have kids you have a different outlook on holiday expectations.

So how do you explain the parents on here who think the op is being unreasonable?

It isn’t down to whether the op has children or not. It’s not a funny “joke”. In general, people without children aren’t idiots who know nothing about children’s behaviour.

The issue here is the op trying to police who can and can’t use a non-child free site.

"then work harder to communicate with your kids, don't let them get so frustrated and respect other people around you."

Yes because working harder always makes a non verbal child verbal - so clueless.

Blondiejay24

there's absolutely no valid reason to let a 18 months old screaming for hours. If you are a lazy parent, you'll find excuses. But why would you let your child be distressed because you can't be bothered to help/distract/comfort him is beyond me.

Kids are not born angels or screamers - it's not luck to have a kid that doesn't scream the neighbourhood down all day.

Think you have misunderstood my comment completely so not going to justify myself.

there's absolutely no valid reason to let a 18 months old scream for hours

How do you know they “let” the child scream? Some children can’t be comforted. You don’t seem to have considered additional needs here.

I think you were within your rights to complain to the manager as it was advertised as quiet and peaceful. The manager should have resolved issue.