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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To not move my fence?

164 replies

compulsiveliar2019 · 08/07/2019 13:52

About a months ago I move my horses into a new paddock on a small farm. On the farm are 3 cottages. The cottages all have a small private garden but also use of a larger communal garden. In one of the cottages there is a family with 2 young boys.

The communal garden sides onto my paddock. There’s kids swings ect in the garden and is clearly where the kids hang out. The younger one is not hers school age but probably not far off. The older one is in school.

My issue is that the kids are left unsupervised in the garden for blocks of time. They are clearly interested in my horses and constantly stand on the fences, shouting at the horses and generally make a nuisance of themselves. I have now had to padlock the gates so they can’t just walk into the field. They are also very rude. The little one when asked to get down off the fence he was standing on replied “ you can’t tell me what to do you don’t live here”. Followed up by “go away you don’t live here” and “hahaha you don’t live here, your bad”. All silly stuff but at that age I would never have spoken to any adult like that ever!
Yesterday I was trying to fill up the horses water trough. The tap is on the far side of the garden from the paddock. I connected to he hose up and turned it on and walked back to the trough so I could clean and fill it. Just after I had got to the trough the littlest one goes and turns the tap of and shouts “you can’t have any water you don’t live here” and runs off laughing.

This type of thing is happening every day. I’m also repeatedly finding balls and toys in the field with the horses that have clearly been kicked or thrown in. I have now stopped giving them back. At first I thought it was a mistake so kindly put them back in the garden for them. Then when it didn’t stop I went and had a word with the parents along with returning all the things that were in my field. They promptly handed them back to the kids (saying “boys will be boys”, and low and behold they are in the field again next day.

I have now had to put electric fencing up in the paddock to keep the horses away from where the children can see them or throw things at them. I really don’t want to have to move the horses because it’s close to home and has good riding. It’s otherwise a great deal.

The parents have got cross because one of the kids (funny enough the little one) has touched my fence and got a shock (shock will hurt but won’t do any damage). He apparently ran off screaming to his mum and the mum has got really cross and wants the fence removed.

The fence is about 10metres into the field which the children are not supposed to be in. There is no way they can have touched my fence without being somewhere they shouldn’t. AIBU to tell her no the fence stays and to keep better control of her kids?

OP posts:
Tiredand · 09/07/2019 20:31

Do you both rent from the same landlord? If so might be worth having a word with him about the fact they are causing a nuisance to other tenants.

ToftyAC · 09/07/2019 20:40

YANBU at all OP. I’d be livid having to deal with unparented little shits.

cookie4640 · 09/07/2019 21:57

Sorry if this has been shared already, I haven’t had time to read all the comments.

This makes me laugh very much every time I see it, I can just imagine these kids doing this...! Make sure the battery is nice and fully charged and you’ve got loud clicks. A mediocre battery will be no good 😘

Little buggers!

TheHodgeoftheHedge · 09/07/2019 22:07

I really would think about installing cameras. Don’t reckon you can’t trust the kids (or their parents) at all.

TheHodgeoftheHedge · 09/07/2019 22:07

*can ffs

manicmij · 09/07/2019 22:10

Keep the fence, in fact erect another one nearer the boundary, have a double one. The parents obviously think they and their children have endless rights and you have to accommodate them. Wrong! They are being irresponsible allowing their children into the field. Good Luck.

MulticolourMophead · 09/07/2019 22:13

I've accidentally touched a mains powered fence before. I'd knocked my glasses off and was looking for them but couldn't see the fence.

Ouch! Will always be far more careful in future.

Ellyess · 09/07/2019 23:32

compulsiveliar2019
I think you have been amazingly dignified in the face of these dreadful children. I do hope that they have become bored with Disturbing the horses and trying to upset you now. They are only little after all and somewhat neglected. Maybe they will become better as time goes by. Do you think they might respond if you tried some kind of friendly approach in a sort of Teacher type of way? Maybe that’s a bit patronising, but the little one seems to be left a bit on its own and gets into trouble perhaps through Boredom.

But I just wanted to congratulate you on managing so well. I hope things get better. Good luck!

Chocmallows · 09/07/2019 23:48

I agree with PP who say it's parents causing the problem. I imagine the DC asking questions and parents saying "well she may own a horse, but she isn't good enough to live here" and "why does she keep using that tap" etc. This would result in the DC making these comments. They wouldn't be so rude if parents weren't feeding their rudeness.

Ignore and any more problems install obvious cameras.

ToffeeCake1 · 10/07/2019 00:41

I highly highly recommend you put signs up regarding the fence. You can quote easily be held legally liable for any injuries occurring, even to trespassers! Make sure that you have warned everyone from know on to avoid any liability!

ToffeeCake1 · 10/07/2019 00:42

quite easily and now on

Sasstal67 · 10/07/2019 07:58

If the parents kick off 're the electric fence again, just explain that the small shock the child received, will help prevent both or either if their offspring potentially receiving catastrophic injuries incurred from twatting about, unsupervised, with people's horses!! I won't even allow our relative's young children into the field with our ponies, due to the fact that children behave unpredictably and that coupled with half a ton of flighty horse flesh, lose in a field, is never a great combination.

Ilfie · 10/07/2019 12:03

Totally obnoxious children with similar parents who obviously have no control of them. Leave the fence where it is!

NotMyRealName123 · 10/07/2019 22:01

I mean CLEARLY you need mantraps between the fence and the electric fence as well.

Like you say, the electric fence was to keep the horses away from the fence (working well), you hadn't anticipated the kids coming in to the field so mantraps are now essential too.

or penguin bollards

Definitely NBU

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