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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To not move my fence?

164 replies

compulsiveliar2019 · 08/07/2019 13:52

About a months ago I move my horses into a new paddock on a small farm. On the farm are 3 cottages. The cottages all have a small private garden but also use of a larger communal garden. In one of the cottages there is a family with 2 young boys.

The communal garden sides onto my paddock. There’s kids swings ect in the garden and is clearly where the kids hang out. The younger one is not hers school age but probably not far off. The older one is in school.

My issue is that the kids are left unsupervised in the garden for blocks of time. They are clearly interested in my horses and constantly stand on the fences, shouting at the horses and generally make a nuisance of themselves. I have now had to padlock the gates so they can’t just walk into the field. They are also very rude. The little one when asked to get down off the fence he was standing on replied “ you can’t tell me what to do you don’t live here”. Followed up by “go away you don’t live here” and “hahaha you don’t live here, your bad”. All silly stuff but at that age I would never have spoken to any adult like that ever!
Yesterday I was trying to fill up the horses water trough. The tap is on the far side of the garden from the paddock. I connected to he hose up and turned it on and walked back to the trough so I could clean and fill it. Just after I had got to the trough the littlest one goes and turns the tap of and shouts “you can’t have any water you don’t live here” and runs off laughing.

This type of thing is happening every day. I’m also repeatedly finding balls and toys in the field with the horses that have clearly been kicked or thrown in. I have now stopped giving them back. At first I thought it was a mistake so kindly put them back in the garden for them. Then when it didn’t stop I went and had a word with the parents along with returning all the things that were in my field. They promptly handed them back to the kids (saying “boys will be boys”, and low and behold they are in the field again next day.

I have now had to put electric fencing up in the paddock to keep the horses away from where the children can see them or throw things at them. I really don’t want to have to move the horses because it’s close to home and has good riding. It’s otherwise a great deal.

The parents have got cross because one of the kids (funny enough the little one) has touched my fence and got a shock (shock will hurt but won’t do any damage). He apparently ran off screaming to his mum and the mum has got really cross and wants the fence removed.

The fence is about 10metres into the field which the children are not supposed to be in. There is no way they can have touched my fence without being somewhere they shouldn’t. AIBU to tell her no the fence stays and to keep better control of her kids?

OP posts:
MrsMoastyToasty · 08/07/2019 15:26

Remind them and their parents that horses can bite and kick and rear up.

pollypenguin01 · 08/07/2019 15:29

I would put a letter through the door saying one of the horses is a rescue horse/stallion/etc and is aggressive. Say it could attack anyone in the field. Make a big point of the field being private property and they shouldn’t be in the field anyway so you’re sure it won’t be a problem but just wanted to give them the heads up to not go near the fence line as the horse will chase and maul Grin

Isatis · 08/07/2019 15:30

You do need to have a warning sign on the fence, and it wouldn't hurt to include in the warning that the horses themselves may bite and kick.

Do you own the communal garden? If the children keep turning off the tap, it would be worth telling the parents that if it happens once more you will be removing the tap and putting one on your land (preferably inside the electric fence) instead.

RockinHippy · 08/07/2019 15:32

Definitely don't move it. I can't stand parents of rude unruly kids who clearly don't even try to parent them. You're nicer than me, I'd have attached it on top of the fence they are so keen to climb on

I'd also be ringing 101 & asking for advice about the harassment, cruelty to your horses(throwing stuff at them) & trespassing your neighbours seem to think is their right - I think a knock on the door from & police officer might show them you mean business & the law is on your side.

billybagpuss · 08/07/2019 15:36

Was it a face to face showdown, in which case what did you say or did she write to you.

I would definitely have a word with the LL and it is worth seeing if they are renting from him too.

AguerosAngel · 08/07/2019 15:39

Definitely don’t move the fence OP! unless it’s to move it nearer to their garden and giving you your space back!

My DSis has a horse and she would go nuclear if anyone threw things into her field or at her horse.

Those little shits sound awful and deserve every zap they get off that fence, I cannot abide anyone being cruel to animals Angry

AllFourOfThem · 08/07/2019 15:40

YANBU.

I would send a letter to the landlord about them. Then I would also send a formal letter to the parents warning them about their children trespassing but phrasing it that you are concerned the horses may injure them, which is why the fence needs to remain in place. Send both letters by recorded delivery and keep a copy, just in case you end up in a situation where you need to prove anything further down the line.

Hooking the fence up to the mains is a great idea. Grin

Purpletigers · 08/07/2019 15:42

Don’t put a warning on your fence , they know it’s there . Even an animal knows not to go near them so I’m sure humans can work it out . I’d move the fence nearer the boundary of the land you’re paying for tbh . Then I’d get a wheelbarrow and make sure I dump all the horse shit beside it .
Attach another battery to it - just to be safe . Dicks !

AmICrazyorWhat2 · 08/07/2019 15:44

Oh and there’s far more danger to the kids in them mucking around with horses than an electric fence so it’s not only protecting the horses but the kids too!

Exactly! Sorry you're having to deal with such irresponsible and rude behaviour, OP. These people sound like idiots, they're actually risking their children's lives by letting them upset your poor horses. Angry.

CuriousaboutSamphire · 08/07/2019 15:47

From Framers Weekly, for those who are wondering about the legalities, need for signs etc:

It is sensible to set barbed wire or electric fences back slightly because if it causes a nuisance to those using the highway you may be liable for any damage caused and the Highway Authority can force you to remove it.

It can help to ensure that barbed wire is not fixed on the public right of way side of the fence.

Where an electrified stock fence is placed alongside a route it should be clearly identified, best practice suggests warning signs should be placed every 50 to 100m.

So OP does not need a sign as her fence is inside her field, not running along any rote or walkway. And she can't put up a Danger! Horses sign... as that could be read as her specific horses pose an individual danger!

So it is all up to the parents to teach their kids how to behave around livestock. Maybe a visit from Joe and Petunia... show them how really not to do it!

CuriousaboutSamphire · 08/07/2019 15:48
MatildaTheCat · 08/07/2019 15:49

Allowing very young children to access a field with horses in, unsupervised and most likely looking for mischief is insane.

Tell the parents that the fence is there for the children’s protection and if they are adequately supervised and parented they will never be at risk of a shock again.

What a horrible bunch.

Lifecraft · 08/07/2019 15:49

Land owners used to use the same argument for mantraps.

Ffs, the two are not even remotely comparable.

No one has said they are. Why don't you read the post properly and try and understand the point.

The point being, that the argument "if you hadn't been somewhere you shouldn't, you wouldn't have got hurt" isn't on it's own a legitimate defence. You need to ensure you are acting within the law, which it appears the OP is.

Soubriquet · 08/07/2019 15:52

I would rather an electric fence than one of the horses kicking the child and potentially killing them

Yanbu

katewhinesalot · 08/07/2019 16:01

Just come back with "It's for the kids own protection, as well as the horses." every time they moan. "I don't want to be sued if my horse injures your child because it has been spooked"

MilkTrayLimeBarrel · 08/07/2019 16:02

Cheeserton - I think it is because a lot of people don't know what the abbreviation means and actually say' eksetera' rather than the full phrase 'et cetera'.

MrsTerryPratchett · 08/07/2019 16:10

The horses are the mantraps, after all they could conceivably kill the children given the right circumstances. The fence is the warning.

regmover · 08/07/2019 16:13

Why aren't you talking to the person you rent your land from about this? Are the cottages rented from the same person?

CuriousaboutSamphire · 08/07/2019 16:15

Cheeserton And it is a typing speed thing. Your fingers get to the c before the t because of it's keyboard placement. Same as the typo becasue.

Histrorically the keys are placed as they are to slow down typists, to allow the metal arms on typewriters to return to the key bed without jamming on the next key struck.

WhoWants2Know · 08/07/2019 16:17

Maybe the horses need a friend, like a turkey or gander to encourage the kids to stay in their own garden.

AmICrazyorWhat2 · 08/07/2019 16:21

A gander is a brilliant idea, he wouldn't stand for any humans invading his territory! Grin

RockinHippy · 08/07/2019 16:22

Maybe the horses need a friend, like a turkey or gander to encourage the kids to stay in their own garden.

This is actually a great idea.

As a kid me & friends were probably similarly annoying oiks though would never backchats as badly as these lot, it do anything to upset the animals
We did trespass a lot though, especially the pig pens. That farmer night geese. They were evil & definitely kept is away from those pigs

Ambydex · 08/07/2019 16:31

Some people would see a big 10m wide strip of horse-free field at the bottom of their garden and think "ooh, that's the perfect place for my kids to play footie"...just saying.

I'm not sure the 10m gap is helping here.

AllFourOfThem · 08/07/2019 16:44

Geese are a legitimate deterrent you could consider using as long as you can ensure you can put them in/let them out during daylight hours.

Isatis · 08/07/2019 16:46

OP doesn't have to put warning signs up as a matter of law, but it's a sensible precaution and will help in the event of further whinging or even legal claims from the children's parents.

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