First, please let me be very clear, our family is NOT wealthy. We've got hit by hard times in the last few years.
However, i come from a very wc background. Large extended family and I loved most of them as a young person. But i was the screwup.
I moved to the city, i didn't stay home, i got an education and married a man whose family is somewhat to very wealthy.
After we married, my brother's wife claimed that i was "difficult to buy for" so i never received ANY Christmas gifts or birthdays either. I would have been grateful for a card. Our dc were deemed spoiled but were actually respectful.
I attended my cousin's daughter's baby Christening (i babysat her with my grandmother and I was very fond of her). I gave her nice new things and hand me downs from our dc. Her mother was kind and happy but when I invited them to our home, I caught a rude gesture to her from her friend out of corner of my eye. (It meant snobby). They never returned my calls. My cousin was the only one who was kind after that, at my mother's funeral. His daughter.didn't even come to the funeral.
We eventually moved far away after my mother died, to my dh's family'area. I was basically exiled from my family. I was accused of being many things but they were not true. I'm not a snob. I loved my family. I was always the same person that I had started out as and I enjoyed being part of my family.
Yes, money buys things, but it's not a substitute for love or family. We made sure our dc aren't snobs. They respect people who are kind and work hard, no matter their financial status.
I actually have a few tears as I write this bc I miss my family.
But they don't miss me.
As long as my mother and grandmother were alive, I was accepted. When they passed away, I was never invited again.
Being snobby works both ways.
(I have had years to go over if I had been a jerk. I truly wasn't.)