Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

About periods and holidays

109 replies

brummiesue · 08/07/2019 08:26

Since turning 40 my cycle has changed a bit and ia anything from 23 days to 30. My periods are 'normal' last about a week with heavy/uncomfortable first 2 days tailing off. I cant use tampons or take norethisterone.
So my aibu, I have 3 weeks off work to go on holiday, because of my cycle I wanted to hold of booking until I had my last period so I could judge when best to go (for a week) to avoid having it while away in a hot country. We are looking for villas and my dh has thrown a wobbly saying that we have missed out on all the best villas leaving it until the last minute, apparantly noone else is ruled by their periods the way I am and I should just manageHmm thoughts??

OP posts:
SuzieQQQ · 08/07/2019 09:21

Mooncup, go on the pill (no need to take the sugar pills you can take it continuously), period indies and you can also buy period swimwear. Absolutely ridiculous to book holidays around your period.

elliejjtiny · 08/07/2019 09:22

Yanbu. I couldn't go on holiday during my period, they are a nightmare and like you I can't use tampons.

LakieLady · 08/07/2019 09:23

YANBU. If that's the sort of holiday you both want, not being able to swim and having to deal with pads etc would really spoil it.

Tell your DH to suck it up for now, in another 10 years or so it won't be a problem. For some of us, the menopause is an absolute blessing.

SoupDragon · 08/07/2019 09:23

You'll get more helpful answers if you're not so snappy OP.

I think her so called "snappiness" was well founded.

TheOnlyLivingBoyInNewCross · 08/07/2019 09:25

Lovely to have the luxury to be able to plan holidays around your period!

SoupDragon · 08/07/2019 09:25

Period pants and ibuprofen (or the tranexamic acid mentioned earlier) could be the answer.

SoupDragon · 08/07/2019 09:25

Lovely to have the luxury to be able to plan holidays around your period!

🙄

stucknoue · 08/07/2019 09:27

As annoying as they are, your husband is right. Why not try the pill so you can regulate them?

theWarOnPeace · 08/07/2019 09:27

I have horrendous periods, so am ruled by them to an extent. Thing is though, they’re awful wherever I am, and as you’ve got three weeks away I wouldn’t put off booking to avoid a period. You will definitely have less choice and probably pay loads more money the closer you are to booking, so I’d be annoyed too if was your DH.

Titsywoo · 08/07/2019 09:28

Buy one of those swimming costumes you can wear during your period. Modibody or something?

Notcopingwellhere · 08/07/2019 09:30

Also, you’re away for three weeks so the period is only going to affect one week if the holiday at most.

Original poster
brummiesue · 08/07/2019 09:31

I am lucky in that I have a 3 week window to book a weeks holiday. We are going to a villa and there are hundreds avaliable with decent priced flights still, he is just very fussy.
I am not 'snappy', I was frustrated that even though I clearly stated that I could not use tampons I was still being questioned as to why. I cant use the pill due to migraines.
Mix of responses thank you, I will show him this thread. For all the people suggesting I am being precious, if you could holiday within a 3 week period when you knew it wouldn't be your period are you honestly saying you wouldn't do it? As suggested I think the best villas get snapped up months and months in advance and we hadnt even thought about holidays then. Many thanks anyway

OP posts:
Original poster
brummiesue · 08/07/2019 09:32

I am going away for 1 week. I have 3 weeks off work to book it within.

OP posts:
adaline · 08/07/2019 09:34

I sympathise OP. I used to have horrific periods and they really did rule my life. If they fell on work days I was often too unwell to work as I felt sick and faint. If it was on days off I just spent all day in bed feeling or being sick - it was awful.

You can really tell the posters on here who've had light, easy to manage periods!

JacquesHammer · 08/07/2019 09:35

I cant use the pill due to migraines

Isn't it the oestrogen component of the combined pill that is a risk for migraines? Definitely worth speaking to your GP about Provera, that's progesterone only.

ZillaPilla · 08/07/2019 09:37

How old are you now OP? I mean for how long have your periods been unpredictable in their timing ie is it something your DH is aware of, or something quite new? If you've managed to deal with them for the time you've been together but only recently they've become something of an issue, it might be that you just need to sit him down and explain.

TabbyStar · 08/07/2019 09:38

I can't take hormonal contraception, it causes almost continuous bleeding, but even where women could, why is messing with our bodies a better solution than just planning around our period, which has no negative health impacts?

Gingeraledrinker · 08/07/2019 09:39

[Sigh] why do other women ...even those who suffer with bad periods themselves ...constantly minimise period discomfort?

Labelling uncomfortable periods as a body "quirk" is deeply unhelpful imho.

Of course it is right and sensible to book the holiday for the good of the family as a whole, but personally, my DC (and dh for that matter) would prefer me to be active and engaged on holiday with them, not curled up in a hotel room in pain.

Blubluboo · 08/07/2019 09:41

I agree with the poster who said they'd love to have the luxury to plan a holiday around their period. It is annoying but it is what it is.

dontdoxmeeither · 08/07/2019 09:42

YANBU.

Some people clearly don't get it! And I say that as someone who probably would have had a rolly eye moment at your post twenty years ago. In the days where my period was predictable, 4days max and could use a tampon.

Nowadays, mine are also all over the place and I also can't use tampons due to prolapse(s). And for those suggesting using a mooncup, that's not possible either.

The swimwear sounds worth a try? I might have a look at that myself so thanks for the suggestion.

dementedpixie · 08/07/2019 09:43

You can get period underwear and swimwear now, could that be an option?

Mumfun · 08/07/2019 09:44

For women who have a prolapse a Mooncup branded cup would be useless as too long. Need to look for a low cervix menstrual cup - there are several on the market like JuJu and Meluna.

dottiedodah · 08/07/2019 09:46

One thing about getting older ,no more periods!.I remember trying to book a break ,and working out which week for me was best.Like you I never got the"hang " of tampons though,(daughter the same )No prolapse or anything .Can you see your doctor at all ,they may be able to help you .Paramol is quite an effective painkiller, and is avaliable over the counter in Chemists .I think your husband is being a little insensitive and there are usually lots of Villas/hols available at last minute surely?

GetOffTheTableMabel · 08/07/2019 09:47

I understand it but I can also understand your dh’s frustration. My periods can drag on for 10 days now I’m peri menopausal and there’s no way to book our trip around them. We go to an area with occasional shark attacks and I hope to stay out of the water completely if I have my period!

bumblingbovine49 · 08/07/2019 09:47

Why the hell are people being so awful to the op. I couldn't use tampons in the last few years before my periods stopped. If I wore one, it made my period pains almost unbearable. My periods were also so heavy they would have ruined at least 2-3 days of a holiday for me. I couldn't swim and had to be close to a toilet as I needed to change sanitary towels at least every hour sometimes. The period pains in the day before and on day 1 were terrible as well., though that usually eased after that to be replaced by the flooding for the remaining 2-3 days Hmm

The only saving grace for me was that my periods were incredibly predictable (every 28-31 days with almost no variation at all in 30 years. OP I completely agree with you but I think you have a DH problem (as they say on MN) rather than a period one