when a rich person says 'money doesnt buy you happiness"

[pingIspom]

aibu to feel like screaming ?

money does buy happiness otherwise they'd give it all away

I have been incredibly poor, starving poor. It occupied my every waking thought.

The idea that I no longer have to worry about very basic necessities frees me immensely.

There are millions of people in this country who are not free.

@sadie789

im sorry about your parents

but your situation would have been 100% tougher if you didnt have money, thats my opinion and it wont change.

I have a six figure salary, I have also been taking anti-ds for eight years. Happiness like love cannot be purchased.

Not everyone in Govan is a raging alcoholic

Quite right, there's that sober bloke who lives above the dry cleaners.

Obviously apart from death that happens to everyone rich, poor or in debt up to the eyeballs, and incurable illnesses i cant think of anything that money couldn't help. That's the reality for most people. I don't think its nasty/petty/jealous to acknowledge that no one is saying wealthy people have a blissful life.

People say that money cannot buy good health, and in some cases that is true. However, it's a well-documented fact that people who are rich/wealthy/solvent/loaded are generally in better health than someone who has fuck-all and is living below the poverty line.

I am talking about people who know they can't have a few weeks off sick, as they won't be able to pay their mortgage/rent/bills, (not everyone gets paid for sick days!) and people on zero hours contracts, who have to ring in to see if there's any work for them that day, and people who are forced to claim tax credits to make ends meet (only to have to pay half of them back over 5 years because they somehow ended up with an overpayment - even though they never had any surplus cash during the time they had the tax credits!)

People who have always been solvent/rich are generally in much better health in general, and are much healthier by their mid 60s than people who have spent their whole life worrying about money. They also look younger and healthier. I see people who have had money worries their whole life, look ten years older than their age at the age of 50. And they almost ALL will have to work til 67-70.

Even many years ago (100 years or more back) poor people would die young-ish (like by 35-40,) but rich people would live to 70-80+. And even NOW, people die before middle age in very poor countries where they have very little food, and lots of diseases.

People who have had a cushy ride; a well-paid job for life/brilliant final salary pension, or a big inheritance, or who have just come from wealth, seem to give up work at around 50-55 (sometimes younger,) and spend their senior years on cruises, and visiting their villa in Portugal/Spain/Florida. They also have access to much better (private) health care, and have anything that needs doing, done within 1-2 weeks. They don't have to wait for 1 year to get it done on the NHS.

So, like it or not, money DOES buy good health in many cases.

And it's ludicrous to suggest that people won't be happier with more money. Lack of money = more stress and poor health.

As has been said, it's patronising and insulting to people who are poor to say money is irrelavant.

Money doesn’t buy happiness. But it does eliminate a source of unhappiness.

I liked the screwdriver analogy. That was very clever.

I guess another one is suppose you had a genetic test and you were told that you have a 0% chance of ever getting any type of cancer. And your children and parents have a 0% chance of getting cancer.

To those who have cancer or have had cancer or at high risk of cancer. It sounds a wonderful position to be in.

And it is.

But it doesn’t mean you can’t be hit by a car. Or fall off a ladder. Or get Alzheimers.

And very soon you will have something new to worry about.

And when your mother dies horribly of Alzheimer’s and can’t even remember your name you may even wonder if cancer would have been a better way to go.

I definitely think there's a "sweet" spot between being broke and being wealthy. I don't think people who work 80 hour weeks can be that happy, despite the fact they may make a lot of money. Because they won't have a life outside of work. And yes, money doesn't protect you from tragedy and there are some very unhappy, but extremely wealthy, people.

However I have been dirt poor and now I'm not and yes, I am way, way, happier! I'm not "rich" but I can go on nice holidays, buy the things I want/need etc. I don't have to add up my shopping on the way round the supermarket in case I don't have enough at the till. Those things do make me happy. I can't say they don't. So yes money has "bought" me happiness.

You can argue it's bought me "security" which makes me happy but really you're just adding in an extra step. Bottom line, the money has made me happy.

@pingIspom I don’t have any money and it’s not my situation. It’s my parents’ situation and I’m not sure how you believe it’s easier? No one is spending any money because what is there to spend it on? The treatment is NHS and then what? Are they off on holidays or socialising with champagne and oysters? No both are sitting at home in a dilapidated house, unable to communicate, eat, drive, walk to shops... it would be the same if they had no money. This is the ignorance of the comment money buys you happiness. Money buys you things. Things don’t make you happy.

Being rich doesn't safeguard you from losing people you love.

Of course not not but it does mean you don't have to worry about how to pay for the funeral for example. Paupers funerals are on the rise apparently.

It also cushions you from the day to day anxieties when someone is ill. Eg my mother used to get 2 buses each way every day to visit my dad in hospital. We didn't have a car. With money, she'd have had a car or been able to take taxis.

That's just one example. There are numerous others.

But Sadie if your extremely wealthy parents spent their money on 24hr care, someone to fix their dilapidated house, cleaners, someone to shop and feed them, nurses whatever - then surely this would alleviate their discomfort

What's the point of being wealthy and not doing that?

Sadie, I'm also very sorry about your parents. I have a good idea what it's like, my father had something similar and my mother was his full time carer. She wadn't I'll at that time thank God but she had 2 children to look after (my dad became Ill in his early 40s). She ran herself ragged with little help from the state and money would have made a massive difference to our lives.

"Wasn't ill"

Billionaire ASOS owner Anders Holch Povlsen has said that three of his four children were killed in the Sri Lanka terror attacks on Easter Sunday.

Do you think he's laughing hysterically all the way to the undertakers?

“Money isn’t everything, but not having it is”.

Yes money won’t buy happiness, but it will prevent the constant stress, anxiety and frustration of money worries.

For those who believe money brings you happiness, explain how it would help if your child were to die? Yes, you can pay for the funeral - what then? You have a massive, pain filled hole in your life that no amount of money can replace.

My DH's family are extremely wealthy, and I can safely say money does not buy you happiness.

SIL cannot have children, has had several rounds of IVF and could easily pay to continue (and may well do) but with each failed round and her age increasing - she is facing the agonising realisation that it may never happen. She may seem to others that she is happy but she is breaking down inside.

It's very sad to think that happiness comes from money. Some people can get their happiness from the material goods their wealth can afford them, but it is not true happiness

That's true of poor people too SilverySurfer - rich people don't grieve more or less

Money doesn't prevent anyone ending up dead - that's not what this thread is about

Money doesn't prevent anyone ending up dead - that's not what this thread is about

But it is though. The implication that money solves all pain and worry and stress.

It doesn't, and that proves it.

As you say, money doesn't dictate grief.

The implication that money solves all pain and worry and stress

Of course it doesn’t, but it makes dealing with pretty much anything life throws at you easier because you haven’t additional stress about money!

You can’t buy happiness, but you can buy choices and different opportunities will open up to you.

Sometimes workaholics become more miserable the more money they make. Or they have breakdowns after they made millions and millions. I’ve seen this a fair bit first hand. Happiness is largely a frame of mind.,

There's a lot of faux naivety being dressed up as some kind of spiritual/moral superiority on this thread.

Of course money can't buy happiness but I'd certainly rather have money if I got ill than have none. I know someone having treatment for cancer, they have money so don't have the added stress off having off work and wondering how they're going to pay the mortgage, food, bills.
I know elderly people with money who get to pick the best care homes and have the option of carers to take them out for the day. Those without money go into a bog standard care home and get the minimum amount of hours for care.
No amount of money can compensate for the loss of a loved one but knowing you can pay for the funeral takes away a little of the worry.

I know someone in very poor health, the strange thing is the only time I see her get upset or worried is when her income is threatend she takes all her health issues in her stride. She's virtually housebound, it's very odd.
Money really does bring her peace of mind. I'd rather be poor and well I think.

Sadie789 if your parents are very wealthy they could pay for private carers - a live in care team if they wanted, cleaners, gardeners, lifting equipment, adaptions and alterations to the house to enable them to avoid residential care, a car which could transport an electric wheelchair and be driven by the carer, the best care home if finally unavoidable. Money could not make them happy but it could alleviate misery.

My grandmother did exactly that - bought in a level of care and adaptions and equipment she wouldn't have had access to if poor. My parents are gradually doing the same - they built a swimming pool to help with my mother's arthritis and heart problems, and buy in household help, can afford to adapt the house as necessary etc.

Money can help in many situations.

When you're stuck in hospital with a dying relative it helps to be able to be afford to be off work, to afford childcare for the children, to afford to buy any food or drink they might have a whim for a mouthful of, to be able to afford to buy your own food in the canteen or hospital shop...

Shit things happen to people at all income levels but statistically wealth is protective for health at a population level. Also as others have said if x shit thing does happen then money provides some choice and takes away some of the practical challenges. For example, with a bereavement of a spouse, a poorer household might not be able to afford life insurance and really struggle to pay housing costs. A richer family might have an insurance pay off and be able to pay off mortgage, have childcare covered or be able to take a career break to spend time with the children. Both families will suffer but the poorer family may also have financial worries to add to their bereavement grief.

So no money doesn’t make someone immune from grief but it does help alleviate other stresses.