To lie to a family member that my sons Ill so he can look after the dog?

[teenmum18]

So we have a family wedding this Saturday but I totally forgot about the dog 🤦🏻‍♀️ can't get anyone last minute to look after her and definitely not putting her in kennels. Ds is 16 and isn't interested one bit in going but hasn't moaned and just excepted that his going. Would it be out of order if I tell the bride and groom that he's got a sickness bug and can't attend the wedding? He can stay with the dog and will happily have the house and food to himself so wouldn't feel left out about not going. I know he'd be fine with it but do you think it's a shitty thing to do to the couple?

I can guarantee there'll be some kind of dog sitter/kennel in your area that will not be fully booked on Saturday, you just need to look around more. Post on your local Facebook page, see if anyone can help out.

Or just do what you're going to do with no qualms anyway and don't ask for opinions because they won't make any difference.

Your mum let you down only last week?

So you were pretty stuffed from that point on tbh.

I see no reason to lie either. Just tell the truth and get your DS to stay at home. I wouldn't leave my dog home alone in this situation. Fifty miles away? And weddings can go on for hours and hours.

There's no need to lie is there?

What you had organised fell through & your son was the only option.

@diddl yep because my dad kept changing his mind. He was changing it up until last night. The woman doesn't know wether she's coming or going lol

"Won't be able to fill the spot at the last minute"

Ha ha I'd like to see them try. How's this for making a guest feel wanted: "We're getting married this Saturday. We didn't invite you before back in January but a spot has come free now, so you could come if you like?"

@MirandaGoshawk I'd tell them where to stick there wedding 😂 I'm no ones second best!

Well done OP 👍🏻

Tell the truth offer to pay for food

Ha ha I'd like to see them try. How's this for making a guest feel wanted: "We're getting married this Saturday. We didn't invite you before back in January but a spot has come free now, so you could come if you like?"

This is pretty common in my circle of friends. Because we all understand how expensive weddings are, and don’t take offence to only be invited to the evening do like most of mumsnet seems to.

For us it would be more “hey, one of the extended family that I only invited to keep the peace has flaked out, fancy coming to get pissed up for the whole day now instead of just the evening?”

the invite was given to us in January. It's a hell of a long time to know what's going to be going on in July.

That’s a long time to plan arrangements for your dog to be looked after.

I cannot believe someone suggested leaving the pup in the car and then, just incase this wasn't enough to overheat it, trot it round the block every so often, and his/her only concern was that it might be too stinky for his/her grand plan Wtf? I really hope this person doesn't have pets or kids "OP" you did the right thing in telling the truth. At least now, they have the option of inviting someone else to take your DS's place if they wanted.

@Reastie ffs read the fucking thread!!! It's not hard is it?

She hasn't even read it yet! Biting my nails off here 😬😬😬😬

Go and make a brew OP

Dear lord theres some people in here with some mad ideas....

Its holiday season, I can assure you that any kennels of any repute AT ALL will have been booked up for months, so suggesting the OP can 'definitely' find a kennel space (which she doesnt want anyway) realy WON'T be happening..

I agree with letting the wedding person/couple know that a guest isn't attending because they may have a standby person, and its polite, but bugger telling them why, not their business and tbh they are likely to have far better things to do than worry about why a 16 year old hasn't come.

I wouldn't blame you for lying but I bet if you rang round you would find someone who would come in, feed and take your dog for a walk. Vets have loads of cards and adverts for people who do that, at our vets one of the nurses does home visits for cats. Not much help to you as you have a dog but I'm sure you can find someone.

@Bluerussian I'm not comfortable with strangers coming into my house. If they were recommended that's fine. But I've contacted them the recommended ones and they can't fit her in. Believe me I've tried it's not happening!

This sort of thing is why dripfeeding on threads is tiresome, the whole thing starts to feel a bit fake.

"I completely forgot to arrange anything about the dog" becomes "I made arrangements with my mum but she changed plans a few days ago"

"I don't want to put the dog in kennels" becomes "I've already tried phoning the kennels and they are full"

etc

Believe me, it's not that easy. I was let down by dog sitter at the last minute and it was a complete nightmare trying to find someone. Kennels are all booked months ahead (not that I would leave him in a kennels - did it once and that was it) and as for dog sitters of any repute - they are in huge demand .

OP - how come your ds has only just found out about the wedding - you mention this in earlier post. Don't you have conversations?!

tell them asap so they can upgrade someone from the evening list

@Sniv how is it a drip feed? I don't want to put the dog in kennels because I don't like them, but I tried them as a last resort!

If you read the thread you will see that I suffer with short term memory loss!
I can't help that my mum let me down.
Move along..

@IrmaFayLear I told him last year that they was getting married. I told him about the invite. He obviously forgot. Teenagers don't listen.

I would tell them the truth, but offer to pay for his meal.

Fingers crossed she replies soon, OP.

Glad you told the truth, hopefully she understands.