Should I complain about my grocery delivery?

[Sultanainasalad]

I had my groceries delivered this morning. The driver (1st time this driver delivered to me) brought it into the kitchen for me. We were chatting about having young kids and how hard it is.

He was friendly and was chatting longer than usual, maybe 10 mins. By the end I was trying to get a natural break in the conversation to move him along. I sensed he was getting a bit flirty, even though I was in shattered Sunday morning mode.

I found the flirty bit annoying as I don't want weird men in my house, I just wanted my groceries but then an hour later he whatsapped me, saying 'it was nice to talk to you this morning' (I'm not going to reply to the creep).

AIBU to be annoyed by that and want to complain about it?

Am I also AIBU to be wary of complaining as he knows my address and phone number?

Were you 'a bit flirty' back? What'sapping you later is crossing a line but before you complain about him is it possible he thought you were flirting too?

The reason I ask this is because I've had several friends/work colleagues meet their partners in similar circumstances eg a tradesman they employed etc... it isn't unusual.

he will no doubt have been told explicitly not to do, used the OP's personal data to intrude into her life
Are they explicitly told though? If not then technically he's doing nothing wrong - just being forward with someone he may have thought was flirting with him. Don't get me wrong, I think firms should be explicit that using customers' details for non-work purposes is a disciplinary offence, and I'd be tempted to contact them and ask them that question, giving them the details of what's happened so that if he is breaking policy he can treated accordingly, and if not then they can change their policy (and possibly have a word with him).

Definitely report back to the supermarket! He has completely breached confidentiality. I have food deliveries and never let them bring my delivery inside, I just take it at the door, even if it's a woman. I am often alone with the kids so I don't want strangers in my house.

He's been completely unprofessional. I'd definitely complain.

If he is a Sainsbury's delivery driver then it would be instant dismissal.

It is weird and he has misread the situation, but I wouldn't want to get him into trouble at work.

Why should be in trouble!! He has misused a customer's personal data. OP gave her phone number to a company so that they could provide a specific service, at no time did she consent to the driver keeping hold of her number or to receiving any personal messages from him and he knows it! He will almost certainly have been warned about this type of thing at the induction stage but chose to do it anyway. It's inappropriate and intrusive. Why should women put up with being made to feel uncomfortable in this way?

Were you 'a bit flirty' back? What'sapping you later is crossing a line but before you complain about him is it possible he thought you were flirting too?

Even if she was, she could have given him her phone number and chose not to, so it was completely out of order for him to take it from the order paperwork and use it for anything non-delivery related.

Meeting someone at work is one thing, a tradesperson who you have given your number to for work is a bit of a grey area IMO, but someone who has had to get your number from a system not intended for dating is out of order no matter what has happened during the delivery.

fe219 definitely not flirty back, we were talking about how much harder children were then we thought, lack of sleep, busy lives etc. I'm a friendly person and it was a friendly chat but that is not my idea of flirting. I told him my husband was upstairs and my mum was in the living room with the kids (all true).

Thanks everyone for your thoughts. I will complain but am a wuss and will now be nervout about it for a while. So annoying!

Massive breach of GDPR. Definitely report him. Be in no doubt that what he has done is wrong. Who knows how many times he's done it before or will continue to do it until he is stopped.

I would make an anonymous complaint to the store, and ask them to have a word with their drivers about remaining professional, especially in their dealings with lone female customers.
This keeps it general enough for it not to be tracked back to you.

Ignore the apologists. I’m really glad you’re reporting him, particularly with your update.

Were you 'a bit flirty' back? What'sapping you later is crossing a line but before you complain about him is it possible he thought you were flirting too?

FFS there's always one, isn't there?
There are plenty of men out there who don't need any excuse to be inappropriate with women. How sad that despite all the many, many instances of inappropriate behaviour, street harassment and general creepiness that goes on there's an assumption that OP must have 'led him on'. OP said they had a chat, she was being polite and friendly. We should be able to be friendly without men assuming sex is on the cards. But even if OP was being flirty, that does not give this man the right to keep hold of her phone number for his own personal use and privately message her. She didn't give him her number, she gave it to his employer to order groceries and he knows it.

That really is crossing the line and a massive breach of GDPR. This needs reporting to but a stop to it as who knows what he will do next. Which supermarket was it?

I worked for Asda.

We would want to know. He misused your personal details. He has those to call if he cant find the house or something. Not to message you and not that sort of message.

He made you uncomfortable and we would want to know, because it's bad for our business and we dont want someone working for us who over steps boundaries and makes people feel uncomfortable.

I work for Asda. Not worked.

I work for one of the big four supermarkets. Definitely, definitely complain. Where I work this would be considered gross misconduct. We have training courses and refreshers about these kinds of things and how important confidentiality re customers' details is.

Also, please complain so that he doesn't do it to anyone else and give the company a chance to put it right.

I would report and ask them not to send him again. Or he might turn up with your next weeks shop!

Grr. What is wrong with some men. Please report this. Texting after is really out of order. Even if it is innocently poor judgement he needs to stop this and he is not a suitable person to be going into customer homes. And the hanging around that long is not on at all. Creepy or unaware of boundaries. Serious either way. Its horrible that women have to worry about things like this.

Don't be intimidated. The company should take it very seriously, esp with GDPR the way it is now. And you have evidence so if anything should result from complaining then you have something to show police, and of course would just prove all the more that he needed reporting in the first place. But he know you have family so i wouldn't worry.

FriarTuck Of course he will have been told not to text customers privately, and if he wasn't then the training needs a serious overhaul so the company needs to know. Its really not on.

I definitely would too because of the WhatsApp.

This has happened to me before with a pizza delivery guy, we didn't even chat when he brought the pizza and half an hour later he sent a flirty text.

Absolutely complain, it’s completely inappropriate to misuse your details that way.

And ignore those saying ‘oh were you flirting back? Lots of couples meet at work’, even if you were flirty it doesn’t give him the right to take your number and message you. It’s hugely inappropriate and very unfair to put you in that position. ‘Romance’ isn’t an excuse.

Are they explicitly told though? If not then technically he's doing nothing wrong - just being forward with someone he may have thought was flirting with him.

a) Yes they are - it's a really basic part of GDPR and data handling and

b) There's no 'technically' about it - he took the OP's phone number from the system used to keep in touch with customers about their orders and used it to send her a personal message. You shouldn't NEED to be told that that's inappropriate and it's technically wrong even if you haven't. It's not 'being forward' it's a misuse of the OP's personal data and it's quite worrying that anyone is defending that.

Oh that would creep me out OP.

Really not sure what I would do but I sympathise

Of course supermarkets train their staff in GDPR.

I would make an anonymous complaint to the store, and ask them to have a word with their drivers about remaining professional, especially in their dealings with lone female customers.

Oh dear. In other words, repeat what they already know. This will completely cheese off the drivers who wouldn't dream of putting a foot wrong because they won't have a clue why an anonymous complaint had been made but will feel they are being unfairly tarnished (and they would be right) while the ones who see themselves as special exceptions to the rule anyway will let it go over their heads and carry on doing it because hey, it's an anonymous complaint anyway and no one can pin it on them.

This is one driver. This one driver needs to be told.

I would report it.

His employers need to know that he is misusing confidential data. Also, he has found himself a job that gives him access to women, some of whom will be vulnerable, many will be single parents feeling trapped at home by their child care responsibilities longing for a relationship with a nice guy who understands the pressures of parenting. He may just be an ordinary, socially inept bloke, but he could just as easily be a predatory paedophile using the job to make contacts with clueless women. Easier and much safer than hanging around outside schools and playgrounds or getting a job that involves working directly with children. Either way he has crossed a line, and he ought to be well aware of having done so.

If the company failed to teach him during his induction why he must never misuse his access to client data then they will get an opportunity to explain the legality of the situation to him. If they did and he ignored them, then that makes him even more suspect and he should face the consequences of his actions.

You have the whatsapp message as concrete proof, there is no way they can dismiss your concerns.

You could also suggest that they employ more women delivery staff. I found myself surprised at how delighted and relieved I felt the first time my groceries are delivered by a woman. So much so that I wrote to the company to let them know how good she was, and what a nice change it made to me as a single woman living alone to have a female person doing the delivery.