Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Next doors pissing parcels WIBU

226 replies

Lovelost01 · 25/06/2019 20:40

Moved almost 3 months ago, waiting to go back to uni so I’m in maybe 60% of daytime hours. Next door is also a single mum and doesn’t work. I hear her in most of the time I’m in.

In the 3 months I’ve lived here, I’ve had delivery people knock for her packages to be left here between 1-3 times a week. Every week. She never introduced herself, I have seen her a few times over the garden fence and said Hi, tried to initiate chit chat when seeing her on the front but she doesn’t seem to want to talk (completely understand that).

Out of all these parcels she has never come to pick them up, the delivery people always say they will put a note through her door so she knows they’re here. I’ve always waited a day or two then taken them round, usually when there’s a few.

On Thursday I accepted a package for her then another man appeared, they brought a huge really heavy box with a picture of a chest of drawers on! He said he was pretty sure he heard someone in the house but no answer so I took it anyway. It’s far too heavy for me to even move slightly. So it’s been here since thursday and she still hasn’t come round. I put a note through her door this morning asking her to come get it and she put one back through mine (?!) saying she can’t because it will be too heavy and she’s a single mum. I knocked for her again knowing she was in but she didn’t answer. It’s definitely too big and heavy even if I suggested we both try to move it to hers we probably couldn’t. WIBU to call the couriers back and tell them I want to return it?! Would they even do that? I can’t open my front door properly because its so huge, cant move it elsewhere!

OP posts:
Bluerussian · 26/06/2019 00:19

You're not being unreasonable Lovelost. There is something strange about the young woman because, if she has ordered things online, one would presume she wants them. As the courier said he felt sure he could hear movement from her home and she didn't answer the door, I wonder if she is reclusive and a little agaraphobic. I know that's not your problem but it does put a different face on the matter.

If the parcel is too heavy for either of you to carry, could you and she hoist it onto her child's pushchair or pram, then she could transport it to her home. Just an idea.

NumbersStation · 26/06/2019 00:35

Our neighbours are holes too.

I took in parcels for them and was used to having to deliver to them. After a while I got ticked off and waited for them to collect. It could be weeks before they came round but thankfully all parcels were smallish.

Until one day I had banshee daughter screaming at me for 'stealing' her prom dress. She is a size 6 and I have an arse that an elephant can only dream of.

I said we didn't have a parcel for them. She insisted we did - effing and jeffing for the whole street to hear - and had the note to prove it. The note said it was with another neighbour... and I politely told her we would never take in for them again.

And yes, couriers are told plainly and yes, it is liberating Grin

HungryForSnacks · 26/06/2019 05:51

@NumbersStation HAHHAA that's awesome

Bixter · 26/06/2019 06:24

Leave it outside your house. If it rains so be it. Lazy cow - your neighbour needs to wake up and stop being a bitch.

Bixter · 26/06/2019 06:25

And for goodness sake, refuse to take in any more parcels for her.

Oblomov19 · 26/06/2019 06:28

Are you such a wet blanket in every area of your life? For Pete's sake, grow a spine!

BlameItOnBianca · 26/06/2019 06:33

Out of interest, in the past, how does she retrieve her packages/parcels from you if she won't open the door or communicate with anyone?

Yeahnahmum · 26/06/2019 06:48

Please try to be more assertive op Blush your neighbour is a cf. When they knock on your door with a package for her just say no. You can do it. I am cheering for you Smile!!

Medievalist · 26/06/2019 06:54

felt awkward that I’d already said yes and signed for it so didn’t say anything before they left

You really do need to man up and be more assertive!

TidyDancer · 26/06/2019 06:58

You need to be assertive with these people or they never learn. Being nice just doesn't work. I've had my fair share of cheeky fuckers over the years and I've had to learn to be hard with them.

You need to tell her that she has two days to either arrange for someone to come and move it for her, or do it herself piece by piece. If she refuses or fails to do so then you contact the courier to return it. And you NEVER accept parcels for her again, no matter the size or importance.

MotherTime3 · 26/06/2019 06:59

The first parcel we took for an old neighbour was a massive part of a car. Courier did same thing by asking and then returning with the huge thing. Couldn’t track neighbour down for days, eventually searched social media for her name. She then turned up expecting me to carry it while she watched (I was 2 weeks post ceserian - it wasn’t happening). We were at stalemate when dh barged out the kitchen, dragged it down the street and put it on their drive for her to shift inside.
In future all requests to take parcels for no 2 were met with a “no, they don’t collect! Sorry” Not one courier ever questioned it
You have to never accept them again once you’ve sorted this. It’s very liberating 😂

Sux2buthen · 26/06/2019 07:13

Agotophobia or difficulty with social interaction don't put 'a different face on it' at all.
It's still not op's problem and if her neighbour hates dealing with people so much she needs to with out a better system

TheGoogleMum · 26/06/2019 07:26

I think do what you can to get it out your house this time but then don't accept any more. It's weird she never comes to pick packages up :s

Pinkmouse6 · 26/06/2019 07:28

Just stop taking them. She’s in the house but ignoring the door which is all manners of weird. Why order so many things online then ignore the couriers?

Miniloso · 26/06/2019 07:35

Just say no next time

MrsAJ27 · 26/06/2019 07:56

Your neighbour is seriously weird. I would tell her she has until this evening to collect or it goes out on the doorstep.

Does she have visitors at all? I don't get why she just doesn't answer the bloody door.

ShatnersWig · 26/06/2019 08:06

As Judge Judy would say "after she didn't come and collect the first parcel, or maybe the second parcel, you were on notice. You should have stopped accepting any more parcels. After the second time, it's all on you"

Seriously, I just don't understand your attitude. If something pisses you off time and time again, why the hell do you keep doing it for weeks on end and then moan about the situation that you have primarily contributed to?

Damntheman · 26/06/2019 08:15

omg no don't deliver the shitting thing! Then she wins, again! Just put it outside and then it's on her.

Sicario · 26/06/2019 08:23

I had one of these neighbours for years. My response to couriers asking to leave her shit with me was "No. She's a cow."

Then I ordered a sign from Timsons saying "No parcels for other houses please" and screwed it to the door.

FakeUsername · 26/06/2019 08:33

Get your dad and brother to put it in her front garden. Don’t open it

Kanga83 · 26/06/2019 08:40

Can you stick it outside her front door? So she has no choice but to take it in once she opens the door? And from now on just 'no'- no reasons, just 'no' and close the door.

TheViceOfReason · 26/06/2019 08:42

Why are people so wet on here? Jeez. Just say you aren't taking in parcels for anyone else as they don't come and collect them.

Even if you'd already said yes, you could have changed your mind and said no once you saw how big it was.

Why on earth have you delivered all her other parcels to her?

In an ideal world, people would always be considerate and not take the piss - but if you make no attempt to have any backbone you can't be surprised that people take advantage.

FriarTuck · 26/06/2019 08:51

Unpack it, take most of the pieces round to her garden, accidentally drop a couple of small but vital pieces and all the screws in your bin while thoughtfully disposing of the cardboard for her in your recycling, job done. Out of your house, she won't bother you again.

greenlynx · 26/06/2019 08:52

Unfortunately you are responsible for the parcel now so don’t open it, don’t put it for sale, etc. The carrier wouldn’t take it back from you. So your only option is to deliver it to your neighbor somehow and make it the last one. If you could ask someone to help it’s great. Leave her a note saying that you will move it to hers tomorrow between say 5-7 pm and leave it in her garden if she’s not in. Take a photo of the note, then take a photo of the parcel when delivered and that’s all.
Actually you made things in some way worse for your neighbour by taking her parcel in as she was expecting it to be delivered straight to hers. Also she might be busy with her child and not always quick enough to open her door. We had this problem in the previous house a lot. The delivery drivers knocked literally for 3 seconds and it wasn’t enough for me to go downstairs. I would give her chance and sort this out politely this time and never ever take any parcels for her again.

Likethebattle · 26/06/2019 08:56

Get a backbone, it’s not awkward to say ‘sorry I can’t have something that big taking up sauce. She never collects!’