To not want in laws at xmas when due 28.12?

[LovesHisMummyReally]

By in-laws I mean 4 younger siblings aged between late teens and mid-30s. They are all scattered in different places in 1 bed flats and we are the only ones who can accommodate everyone so they won't get together otherwise. But really, it's fair to just want your own space when you are about to drop, right? I spent 20 hours of labour walking around the house in my underwear doing various poses to deal with contractions last time, for example. Thanks

Im french too :) Still- you should put your foot down!

Ugh just saw your update Im sorry I missed it. Good for you and congratulations xx

I was once at a birthday party where a family member was pressured to go to 1 day before the due date on a hot summers day (so wearing thin materials). Her waters broke quite spectacularly halfway through the party, she looked really vulnerable while we cleaned it up and gave her a beach towel and a plastic bag for in the car.

Thanks everybody, this gave me the courage to tell him it ain't happening. He looked miffed (he had the idea they would be helpful....) but got it and we are going to suggest they come for Easter. Airbnb is obvious alternative but they just won't sort it out and I sure ain't.

Brilliant! Make sure you see that text!

Do you think I they will take it well?!

I don't think you shouldn't have your parents there just because he's cancelling his family. Make sure he tells them ASAP that they can't come though!

Right decision definitely. I hosted Christmas a couple of years ago two weeks before due date and it was horrendous. People all say they'll help but the reality is on they day they either don't bother or just do things badly like stack the dishwasher so nothing actually gets clean (as they don't have to deal with sorting it later) and just leaving food around as they don't know if you want it or whether to bin it. Nobody takes any initiative so it's you that needs to say we'll open presents now or whatever.

I dislike hosting Christmas at the best of times but pregnant or with a baby it is horrendous.

Absolutely no chance. You could be in labour!! If you want to spend Christmas together then you need an air BnB as other suggested that you can pop in to for the day and leave when you’ve had enough.
No chance would I be hosting though!

And I think, in the circumstances, you’re well within you rights to say you want Christmas in you PJs with a selection box on your bump and you’ll catch up with everyone in the new year.

Well done that girl! 😁

Just make sure you check that the message actually has been sent though and is very clear...

Another thought- something to prepare in advance of Christmas. Write down a list of all the duties/tasks that hosting them would have involved. Like an event running sheet. Add in everything from ‘go pick up pudding ingredients’ to ‘run a wash of towels’.

Pull it out and refer to it frequently when those dates arrive. Whether you are cradling a new bundle, or just lolling helplessly on the sofa by then it’ll be fun to keep reminding your DH ‘Oh look, if I hadn’t put them off coming, you’d be doing ‘x’ ‘x’ and ‘x’ right now!’. Do that several times a day. Set alarms in his phone. I think he needs to have the point driven home, to stop this nonsense recurring.

I have a DH who is full of ‘nice ideas’ that often involve changing the Laws of Time & Space. Unless he personally feels the pain of his ‘plans’, the pace of them accelerates. And I don’t appreciate being cast as the ‘fun police’.

Well done OP 👏🏻

Baby may already here by then - and you'd still have them all in your house with a newborn?
You've got 6 months seriously just say no you've changed your mind due to risk of baby arriving early.
So many people on MN with situations that JUST REQUIRE A SIMPLE NO!

Agree with another poster. Send a nice message to inform everyone that there will be no Xmas meal at yours as you'll be due with the baby. As long as you know about it, they can plan an alternative between them.

Well done OP. Stuff like this, arranged late in pregnancy always gets a big no from me. I went into labour with my first at 37+2, and second at 41 weeks, so I don't put much stock in due date, and view those last few weeks as "Baby could arrive at any time" and therefore having anyone to stay etc would just be an instant no. You could have had the baby by Christmas, you could be in labour, at the very least you'll be uncomfortable and exhausted in the late stages of pregnancy. I hope DH's family are understanding, you've made the right call.

My update OP? I really hope the visitors have been cancelled!