To wonder why so few women use the diaphragm nowadays

[Jemima232]

I am forever reading posts about contraception and wonder why so few women use the diaphragm or cervical cap nowadays.

I used both for years and found them very reliable.

No hormones, no coils leading to heavy bleeding/pain and no condoms.

Why have they gone out of fashion?

Gosh I just clicked on the link. I think if my ovaries hadn’t been removed, they would have just shrivelled up in the last 5 minutes.

Monstrance
Wouldn’t that be really painful for you seeing how big your dh is??

5% fail rate is quite high when you are on medication which would be dangerous for a baby if you were to fall pregnant. For that reason I wouldn’t use it.

To be honest, I don’t know anything about it? Do you have to fit it before you have sex? And then use a spermicide too! I can see that a lot of people wouldn’t be arsed to put it in and therefore the chances of pregnancy would be hire

They're marvellous, especially when used with a condom, but very hard to find anyone who can fit one these days.

My gynaecologist measured my vagina and told me what size to buy.

I think it depends on your circumstances I guess... me and dh have been married for years and years, we both have low fertility so our overall chances of unwanted pregnancy is lower than most anyway, we have a disabled child and a teenager so sex is a pretty rare occurrence and only on “date nights” anyway (!) so it’s easy to think I’ll whack it in (the diaphragm that is ) and we don’t tend to have time for spontaneous quickies so it suits us.

If you’re in a new relationship having constant sex and shagging like rabbits it probably isn’t for you...

As for it being fiddly - I find it much, much less fiddly than using a mooncup. It just slides in and settles itself against the bone (it doesn't have to be airtight, because you slather the edges and the surface that go against the cervix in spermicide).

There's only a few days of the month where my body doesn't spit out things that need to sit above the public bone. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Back in the eighties I once worked out I knew 11 women who conceived when using one!l

It sounds like an absolute faff. I also don't like the idea of things getting lost up there (I don't use tampons except for swimming).
Condoms can be sexy, my bf likes me putting it on for him, I doubt he'd be as excited to cram a slippy diaphragm up my bits

I would imagine its premediated and takes the spontaneity out of the moment - Ben Elton does a brilliant sketch about the trials of female contraceptive choices and this is right up there. Quite literally!

Alright OP, we get it. You like the diaphragm.
Doesn’t mean all other women should be as enthusiastic- every woman puts thought into what contraceptive works for them.
I for one wouldn’t want to put it in because I don’t like touching inside there and therefore wouldn’t use one.

My youngest sibling was conceived when my mum was using the diaphragm.

My gynaecologist measured my vagina and told me what size to buy.

They really need a hysterically laughing emoji.

I used to use a silicone Lea's shield (which is sadly no longer being made - apparently, the factory where they were being made suffered damage and never came back. Caya diaphrams are similar but not quite the same). I found it great for a decade, had no issues until POI caused vaginal issues that made that and menstrual cups too painful to use.

I think fewer women use them similar to why a lot of people stop using condoms in long-term relationships and more women are moving away from the pill onto things they don't have to think of every day - it's another thing to think about and many prefer not to think about it. It's a great option for some and that it should certainly continue to be supported which is a struggle to find in some areas, but I don't think it's ever going to be a very popular option.

Pretty much every time I said that was what I was using to a medical professional, they made it very clear they disapproved or weren't entirely sure what I was talking about (usually the younger ones). Much like choices in many things where there are multiple options, social and medical preferences influences people alongside the information that is out there.

I am the product of a diaphragm failure. They're also a faff and nowhere near me fits them. And they need quite regular re-fits compared to an iud.

I was conceived while my mum was using one and my sister also got pregnant using one.

I asked for one before I started having sex because they seemed like a good option but I had quite a strong hymen and couldn't face the pain. After losing my virginity (painfully) I tried again and used one for a few months. I hated it and found then a massive turnoff but don't know if sex would have been better without it - I found touching my genitals disturbing but was too passive to ask my boyfriend to wear condoms, plus when i did go on thd pill i had a lower libido. I wasn't good at placing it, I believe I only didn't get pregnant on it because my boyfriend and I saw each other very infrequently.

If it's so easy to get it wrong, perhaps it's not that women are crap at using them, it's that they're poorly designed.

If used correctly, with spermicide, the failure rate is said to be 5%.

I actually think the failure rate is lower and that most women don't use them correctly.

You've got something backwards here.

If used correctly, with spermicide, the failure rate is 5%.
So if people don't use it correctly every single time, the failure rate is higher.

The NHS says:
Perfect use: 92-96% effective. Between 4 and 8 women in 100 who use a diaphragm or cap with spermicide will get pregnant in a year.
Typical use: around 71-88% effective. Between 12 and 29 women in 100 using a diaphragm or cap will get pregnant in a year.

That's way too high a pregnancy risk for me.

I agree OP.
I have used a diaphragm for years - a brilliant method.
Has limitations of course, for a young fertile couple may not be effective enough, but I used for years while charting ovulation and doubling up with condoms on fertile days.
Insertion is easy, I would pop it in while getting ready for bed, brush my teeth, wheter or not sex happened.
It is a method very gentle on the female body, no fumbling with condoms.
Like others my practice nurse said she rarely fits them but I think it is a great device.

@Perditavita

I wasn't trying to promote the use of the diaphragm.

I was just wondering why women weren't keen on using them nowadays, that's all.

Of course contraception is a choice, as it should be.

I feel like diaphragms are very '80s'.

Did anyone here ever use a Femidom?!

Because condoms are easier and more deceive and less faff

Femidoms truly are awful. Like a carrier bag version of a condom...

I can remember having to chase it around the bathroom more than once

I have a weirdly shaped cervix and when I was being fitted for a diaphragm the doctor had to chase it round the surgery - twice. Think frisbee.

OH got a vasectomy.

I don’t like the feel of condoms and neither does dh, but I know lots of people don’t mind them. With a diaphragm you can’t feel anything.

I was keen on the idea, got a caya diaphragm, used it correctly (as far as I could see) got pregnant.
Would never use again for this reason!