To wonder why so few women use the diaphragm nowadays

[Jemima232]

I am forever reading posts about contraception and wonder why so few women use the diaphragm or cervical cap nowadays.

I used both for years and found them very reliable.

No hormones, no coils leading to heavy bleeding/pain and no condoms.

Why have they gone out of fashion?

I'm in my early thirties and whilst I know they are a 'thing', I wouldn't have the first clue how to obtain one or use it correctly.

How long before the act do you put it in? Is it fiddly?

It is the least reliable form
of contraception. There is much is simpler and easier forms of contraception out there. You can't use it spontaneously. And it's not something I feel comfortable with, tbh.

Great that it worked for you though.

I can remember having to chase it around the bathroom more than once.

@Ninkaninus Not even stealth. Just a boast

I used to use one and it was the best contraception I ever used, hands down. The only negative was just how very hard it was to get a doctor to fit me for one. I was a married woman, who's stated personal situation was that I didn't plan on having children right away but would cope just fine if I did get pregnant. I had researched diaphragms extensively, was well aware of the risks but I visited and was rejected at 4 NHS clinics. I eventually got sorted at Marie Stopes (for £90) but it was really horrible having my choices undermined repeatedly.

It's really hard to find a clinic which will fit them these days.

I assume because they're one of the least reliable methods of BC and don't protect against STIs.

I used one years ago and couldn't find a clinic that would fit one when I tried a few years ago.

I asked my GP about it when I was much younger and she said “well, in theory the failure rate is about one in twenty, and yes, I have about fifty women in my practice using it and, thinking about it, I probably do see two or three of them with failures every year.” Hearing it in such a concrete way put me off. Much later in life, when pregnancy wouldn’t have been such a disaster I asked a sexual health clinic about them - they gave me a disposable one to try, and I failed utterly in my attempts to remove it, and had to go back to ask the nurse. This is also why I’ve never tried the mooncup.

Following on from that, GP’s prejudices when it comes to contraception are often based on that hands on acquaintance with the stats. They’re no longer just numbers to them.

I went to my local NHS sexual health clinic a few weeks ago for one (I can’t use hormonal contraception due to autoimmune conditions). I was given a Caya diaphragm which is the same one you can buy on amazon. They didn’t actually fit it for me, it’s one size fits most and they just give you the thing and the spermicide and links to you tube vids of how to fit it. I’ve had no issues with it at all. I did have one fitted a long time ago - 20 years ago actually- but the doctor at the icash clinic said the Caya is very good and doesn’t need fitting - you can feel yourself if it’s covering your cervix well or not.

I know that they won’t suit some women - to the person that quoted me earlier!- but I do think a lot of women just don’t know much about them as we just don’t talk about them anymore.

ClashCityRocker you put it in up to six hours before, having smothered it with spermicide front & back & around the edge first (which is the slippery bit!), then if you think it might have been in too long, you put another squirt of spermicide up there, using an applicator, before DTD. It can be a messy & fiddly business.

I liked mine, right up until I discovered I was pregnant with DS1, it did require a certain amount of discipline that I clearly lacked.

For most people they are unacceptably poor as a contraceptive and unacceptably involved to use.

Your experiences regarding not getting pregnant are moot. The 5% figure relates to a year of regular sex. At that (comparatively high) rate you expect to see a pregnancy every twenty years of regular sex for one couple, essentially one unwanted child/pregnancy per marriage.

Why would you want a form of contraception so unreliable you have to expect an unwanted pregnancy within your reproductive lifespan?

www.amazon.co.uk/Caya-Diaphragm-Natural-Contraceptive-Applicator/dp/B01B50WWT0/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?s=gateway&keywords=caya+diaphragm&sprefix=caya&tag=mumsnetforu03-21&qid=1561225388&sr=8-1

Horse & cart used to work fine, but now we have cars...

Because of the really, really horrendous UTIs?

Omg 😮 when I’m holidaytoo. Awful

Heheheh yes...

< hi-fives Monstrance >

@Asdf12345

I wanted to use it because I could not use hormonal contraception and had had a coil which had to removed due to pain and bleeding.

Neither of us were keen on condoms. I don't know anyone who is.

I put it in every night just before we went to bed and put the spermicide in as well. I admit the cervical cap was more difficult to get the hang of but the chance of getting a UTI was lower, so I persevered.

As**@alittleprivacy** said, when you're married and not desperately worried if you get an unwanted pregnancy, the diaphragm is a good contraceptive.

I have never had a partner who wouldn’t wear a condom for me (latex free if required) because I wouldn’t have sex if they didn’t. Condoms are far more reliable than diaphragms.

I completely agree, OP (I have used for many years and have never had any problems).

I think there is a vested interest in keeping women on hormonal contraception. Diaphragms are cheap and last for years. The pill brings in constant revenue for pharma companies.

Because it sounds like a pain in the arse.

I don’t think the fact that you specifically have never gotten pregnant with one in 25 years is really all that scientific an analysis. Some women go for that long and never get pregnant anyway, surely your own fertility is a factor.

The NHS website says it’s 92-96% effective so for every 100 women, between 4 and 8 will get pregnant

Yes but many women are worried about getting pregnant...that’s why they want a very reliable contraceptive.

I got the coil when I had had two children. I did not want anymore. I still don’t.

We don’t only have sex at night in bed, either, so oftentimes it would literally mean me having to stop everything mid session to go and get myself sorted. That really would not work for me.

How long before the act do you put it in? Is it fiddly?

The doctor who sorted my first one recommended putting it in every night before bed because he knew "about those middle of the night cuddles"!

I used one for years, from 30 to my menopause and it worked fine. One was slightly too large, and gave me cystitis-type symptons, but that was easily sorted.

And it's slightly perturbing when your period starts when you've got it in. You don't realise until you take it out, which led to a rather embarrassing incident when I stayed at a friend's. It twanged as I took it out and her bathroom looked like a crime scene! Thankfully, it was fully tiled.

I didn't find it a faff. Much better than a coil, which gave me terrible cramps.

They're marvellous, especially when used with a condom, but very hard to find anyone who can fit one these days.

Because it sounds like a pain in the arse

Only if you shove it in the wrong hole!